Cornered
by 1gurgi1
Summary: Haunted by his mother's death. Cornered by his father's relentless blame and abuse. Friends that couldn't possibly understand. Then Axel comes along. Roxas' life is messed up in more ways than one. Can Roxas be set free?
1. Much Too Young

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**The first thing I want to address is the title. If you read my previous Fic Complete 180 you'll know that I asked for help deciding on a title for this. After talking to my best friend Bethany; Tabi Caracu and Alecksander92 and sorting through my ideas and suggestions I decided on Cornered.**

**Second thing I want to address is the nature of this story. It's AkuRoku so if you don't like yaoi I suggest you find another Fic to read. I'm rating it M due to coarse language and abuse that occurs. I don't do sex scenes. Period. I've tried my hand at them and I don't like how they turn out. No matter what I do it always turns out primal and crude even though it's not meant to be. The most you're gonna get out of me is detailed kissing. **

**Third, my stuff is always AU and I usually warp the characters personalities to my liking, but not extremely, so you can consider it OOC I guess.**

**Last thing, and this is totally unrelated to the story, if you happen to play the games HOW THE HELL DO YOU BEAT DEMYX IN HOLLOW BASTION! I'm very incompetent when it comes to video games so I fail. A lot. Usually I'm fine with doing a fight over and over until I win, but I swear if I hear him say 'Dance, water dance!' one more time I'm gonna pull my hair out! If I knew how I would totally reprogram the game so that Sora snatches the guitar out of his hand, smashes it against a rock and walked away saying 'Now that that's over with…'**

**Okay, enough of my rambling. Time for AkuRoku~~**

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><p>"Roxas!"<p>

A spasm of fear traveled though me when my father gruffly shouted my name as he slammed the front door behind him.

I set down the book I had been reading and got up, staring at my door warily. I opened it a crack so that I could listen.

He kicked his shoes off in the entryway, walked into the dining room and slammed his briefcase onto the table.

_That's not good… He had a bad day at work…_

The fridge door was opened and I heard the clinking of glass as he reached for a bottle of beer.

_Straight for the beer? Scratch that. He had a horrible day at work…_

I winced at the sound of the wooden chair legs being pulled back over the tile floor. He sat down with a grunt and popped off the cap of the beer.

He obviously wasn't in a good mood so I figured it was safest to hide out in my room the rest of the night. I started to quietly shut my door…

"Roxas! Get your ass out here and make me some fuckin dinner you useless piece of shit!"

"Fuck…"

That's my dad for you. He's so eloquent with his words. Always knows just the right thing to say…

I hesitated for just a second before opening my door and heading towards the kitchen. If I didn't come out he would just come after me. I know doing what he says doesn't guarantee anything, but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

His face set into a grimace when I stepped into the kitchen. He took a swig of his beer and loosened his tie. His eyes never left me as I walked towards the fridge to take out something to cook.

"Hey Dad. How was work?"

_Might as well try to be civil… It's never worked before but there's a first for everything…_

He scoffed and took another swig of beer as I pulled out a package of thawed chicken.

"It was just fucking fantastic Roxas! You know how much I love working with brainless idiots all damn day!"

I ignored his excessive use of sarcasm and started cutting the chicken into smaller strips that would be easier to fry.

"That sucks Dad… At least you got off early today, right?"

I reached for the bag of flour on top of the fridge and winced at the pain that traveled up my side. My ribs were still a little bruised after coming home 5 minutes late last week.

"Yea, coming home early is great! More time with my boy!"

He toasted his beer towards me but the sarcasm and disappointment in his voice made the action degrading in a way.

I didn't say anything else to him after that. Talking wasn't doing anything in my favor. I just went back to cooking the chicken.

"When's my fuckin food gonna be ready!"

_Why don't you learn to cook for yourself fat ass!_

_No! Don't get angry. It's worse when you retaliate._

"I'm working as fast as I can Dad…"

He scoffed and I knew that he was thinking it wasn't fast enough.

He tossed back the rest of his beer and got up to grab another out of the fridge. I noticed that there was only one left and that was very, very dangerous.

He finished off his second beer as I cooked and snatched the last one out of the fridge.

"We're out of beer… Roxas go to the store and buy me some more!"

I rolled my eyes and forced myself to keep my voice level.

"I can't Dad. I'm not 21 and even if I was alcohol can't be sold on Sunday. You'll have to buy some tomorrow."

He slammed his beer onto the table.

"Don't treat me like an idiot Roxas!"

I held back the chuckle that wanted to escape my lips.

"Never Dad."

I turned the burner off and took a plate out of the cabinet above the stove and started placing the chicken onto it. Then I grabbed another plate for myself and took some silverware out of a drawer before starting to walk to the table.

"What the hell's in your ear Roxas!"

I recalled the pain of the metal stabbing through the cartilage of my right ear earlier this morning. It had been a spur of the moment decision but after looking at it in the mirror constantly I realized it actually suited me.

"It's called a piercing Dad. Don't worry. It didn't cost you a thing."

It all happened so fast. My dad rocketed from his chair. The plates shattered when they hit the floor, sending glass everywhere. The forks and knives scattered around me as my knees hit the floor.

It wasn't until I was gasping on the floor curled up on my side that the pain from being punched in the stomach caught up to me.

I stared up at him in shock as he towered over me, trembling with anger at whatever had set him off.

"Don't patronize me boy! Who told you, you could go mutilate your body? Cause I sure as hell didn't! Huh! Answer me!"

I tried to push myself up off of the floor. A shard of glass pierced my hand as my father's foot came down on my leg. I cried out in pain and a deranged smile wove its way onto his face.

I scowled up at him and snarled through clenched teeth.

"What's it matter if I got a fuckin piercing! You have no problem with it when you mutilate my body!"

He brought his foot down on my leg again before kicking me in the stomach repeatedly.

"Shut up! Don't talk to me that way! Shut the fuck up!"

The fire that lit his eyes every time this happened ignited. He _enjoyed _this.

The salty tang of blood entered my mouth as I bit down onmy lip to prevent myself from crying out. I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of hearing me endure his torment.

"That's what I thought! Don't have anything to say now do you, you little piece of shit! Get the hell out of my sight!"

He aimed a final kick to my gut before snatching his beer bottle off of the table and storming into the living room.

Once he was gone, I thrashed about; kicking at everything in reach.

"Fuck!"

I winced at the throbbing pain in my hand and yanked the shard of glass out and threw it to the floor among the others.

I lay there for a few moments, drowning in a pool of self pity before pushing myself up off of the kitchen floor; wincing at the pain that was coursing through me.

I looked at the mess on the floor in disdain. I turned away from it and wrapped my arm around my stomach as I hobbled back to my room.

I slammed the door behind me and flipped the lock. It was pointless though. My dad wouldn't have any reservations about breaking the door in. It was his house after all. He could do whatever he damn well pleased.

I collapsed onto my bed and rode out another wave of pain. Once I felt like moving, I reached over to my bedside table and took an old, folded piece of paper out of the drawer.

I unfolded the permanent creases and looked down at the words I had memorized long ago.

_Roxas, I can't guarantee you'll ever read this but I'm writing it all the same. I need you to understand. Throughout my life everything was handed to me, but that all changed when I abandoned my family to be with your father. All of sudden I was expected to do things on my own. Depend on myself instead of others. I tried… but I never learned how. I wasn't ready to be a mother to you Roxas. I remember bringing you home from the hospital and you cried all day and night. I couldn't get you to stop. Nothing I did worked. I locked myself in the bathroom and covered my ears until you finally fell asleep. How was I supposed to raise you when I was still a naïve child at heart that didn't understand anything? Taking care of you, your father, and working; it all was too much for me Roxas. I tried Roxas. Believe me when I say I tried, but I was a failure as a mother Roxas. I couldn't live with myself if I was constantly going to fail you. No mother wants to be seen as a failure in her child's eyes. Taking myself out of the picture is what's best for you. I'm sure of it. You're father will take care of you. He loves you as much as I do. I love you Roxas. With all my heart. Never doubt that. Love just isn't enough sometimes._

I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to conjure a good memory of her. I couldn't. I just recalled that she had been beautiful and that she hadn't been in a stable set of mind for a while. I tear slid down my cheek and landed on the only thing I had left of my mother.

I had found it years ago in a box in the attic while I was looking for something. I knew right away that Dad had hidden it away from me. I took it and had kept it hidden in my drawer and read it every night.

I had gone years thinking that I hadn't meant anything to her. And I could never ask Dad if it were true or not. He never talked about her. Not since that night we came back from the hospital…

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><p>"<em>Sir, you have to calm down…"<em>

_I looked up from the toy truck I was playing with in the hospital lobby at the sound of Daddy yelling._

"_Whatcha doing Roxas?"_

_I turned to look at the nurse talking to me. I remembered she was nice cause she had given me candy._

"_Playing with this truck! The nice police officer gave it to me to play with… Why is Daddy yelling at him? The police officer is nice. Why's Daddy being mean?"_

_She looked over at them before smiling at me._

"_Your Daddy's just upset right now. He's not trying to be mean."_

"_I will not calm down! My wife's dead! That child killed her!"_

_The nice nurse frowned before taking my hand._

"_Did you like the candy from earlier? I know where there's a whole bowl of it just for you!"_

_The nurse's promise of candy was the only thing on my mind as we walked away._

"_Sir, I understand you're upset but you mustn't blame your son. I just got done talking to the doctor. Your wife hasn't been stable for a few months now. This note was found on her person."_

"…_See! She says so herself! That child was too much for her! It's his fault she's dead! That child's a monster!"_

_I looked back at Daddy as I popped the candy into my mouth._

"_What's wrong with Daddy? Why's he crying?"_

_She looked back at them again and patted my head._

"_Nothing sweetie."_

"_Sir, I understand that this is difficult for you but blaming your son isn't the answer. Nor is it healthy for you or your son. If you honestly feel that way… I can take him into the states custody. He's a bright, healthy young boy. He could easily find a family willing to adopt him…"_

"_You've lost your damn mind if you think you're going to take my son away from me! He's the only thing I have left of her!"_

_He walked over to me and lifted me into his arms._

"_We're going home!"_

_I smiled at the nice nurse and waved._

"_Bye!"_

_Daddy was silent the whole way home. It didn't bother me though. I was used to Daddy not saying anything while I talked. It was always Mommy that listened and talked with me._

_We stepped into the house and started to head to my room before a thought struck me._

"_Daddy? Where's Mommy? I haven't seen her since she fell asleep earlier."_

_Daddy fell to his knees and pushed me against the wall._

"_Daddy? What's wrong?"_

"_Gone… She's gone… And it's all because of you! It's all your fucking fault!"_

_His grip on my arms tightened and it started to hurt. Spit hit my face as he yelled at me. I was scared._

"_I don't understand… Daddy let go!"_

_No matter how much I screamed, he wouldn't let go. He just kept gripping my arms tighter and tighter._

"_Daddy! Stop it! You're hurting me!"_

_I didn't know what else to do so I started kicking at him._

"_Good! You deserve to hurt for killing your mother! Apologize!"_

_I didn't understand. Mommy's dead? I killed her? How?_

"_Apologize!"_

_I felt his finger nails cut into my arms and I screamed at how bad it hurt._

"_I'm sorry! I'm sorry Daddy! Please stop!"_

_Snot and tears blended together as they streamed down my face._

_I had seen monsters on TV but right now Daddy was a real monster. I was afraid of Daddy._

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><p>I had been much too young to understand that my mom had been mentally ill for a year. Much too young to understand that she was planning on killing herself. Much too young to know that the candies I thought she had been eating were actually the pills that killed her. Much too young to understand that the 'child' my father was referring to was me. Much too young to understand why he blamed me. Much too young to understand why I went to bed terrified of my father for the first time in my life…<p>

I snapped back to the present when I heard my father's bedroom door slam shut.

I tiptoed over to the wall and waited until I heard the springs of his mattress squeak before going back to my bed and sliding under the covers and waiting for sleep to overcome me.

This was how my life was. How it had been since that night. Cornered. Trapped. A prisoner in my own home. Bound by fear and unable to break free.

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><p><strong>So that's the first chapter! I I couldn't stop working on it and I finished it so I figured I might as well upload it. I like how it turned out even though I only spent 2 days on it. What do you guys think? I wanna know before I start the second chapter. I don't wanna slave over this if people hate it.<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

**Okay, so if you've read my previous stuff you know that I update at lightning speed. Well that won't be the case with this story. Usually I spend a month drawing my story and writing rough drafts before editing and then finally uploading the chapters. Well that's not how it's happening this time. I have no idea where this story is going or how it's going to end. Hell, I barely know what's happening in the next chapter. So just be patient with me and I'll get it up as fast I possibly can.**

**In other news~~**

**Upside about today: I hung out with band and orchestra friends from high school.**

**Downside about today: I LOST THE GAME! Over and over and over again. If you play the game I'm sorry. If you don't just ignore this. **


	2. Go Back

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**Ack! Sorry for keeping you guys waiting on me to upload this! I finally finished sketching it out and sat down to type it… but the words weren't coming! Writer's block set in with a vengeance! DX I honestly wasn't sure if I'd have this up before Christmas (if at all) but then Bethany (best friend) talked (yelled) at me. *shivers in fear* She's very… persuasive (scary) when she wants to be… I'll explain in greater detail at the end of this.**

**AkuRoku~~**

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><p>Air whooshed out of my lungs when my father threw me against the wall.<p>

He had sent me to pick up his suit from the dry cleaners but they had closed at 5. When I came home empty handed he snapped and grabbed me by my shirt.

"Do you realize I have a very important meeting I have to attend in the morning! I need that suit Roxas but that obviously doesn't matter to you does it! You've never appreciated how hard I work to put a roof over your head! To clothe you and feed you! You ungrateful piece of shit!"

I felt like a helpless child every time I was subjected to his abuse

I scrabbled at his hands, trying to get him to let go. It was useless. His hold was too strong and I couldn't bring myself to hurt him. No matter what he did he was still my father…

All I could was yell in my defense and try to make him see reason.

"There was nothing I could do! They were closed! Calm down! Just wear a different suit Dad!"

That was when he threw me against the wall. The impact hadn't been that hard but I hit my arm just the right way and it was throbbing from the pain that shot down it.

I sat up awkwardly and glared up at his towering figure. I averted my eyes from his. The obvious loathing in his eyes was too much for me to handle.

"Another suit! All of my other suits are crap Roxas! If you weren't so self absorbed you'd know that! If I show up looking like shit I could possibly lose my job! Did you ever think about that? Of course you didn't!"

He started to advance towards me but he stumbled over his briefcase and I took that as my chance to escape. I managed to get back on my feet without using my right arm and ran down the hall and out the front door.

"Roxas! Get your ass back here! Now!"

I ignored my father as he yelled after me. I knew he wouldn't come after me out of the privacy of our 'home.'

I was safe... For now...

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><p>I kept running until I couldn't run anymore. A painful stitch had developed in my side so I slowed to a fast walk and waited for my breathing to go back to normal.<p>

My mouth was parched but I didn't stop to get something to drink. I still hadn't put enough distance between myself and my father. I just wove my way through the crowded streets; bumping into people without bothering to apologize.

My phone started to ring and I groaned when I saw whose picture popped up.

"Hello?"

"…Roxas! I'm surprised you picked up. I've been trying to call you for a week now! Where have you been? Why are you skipping school? Is it your Dad? Well… we can talk about it later. I was thinking we could go ou—"

"Sorry Kairi. I can't talk right now. Bye."

I hung up before she could rope me into hanging out with her. I loved Kairi like a sister and I felt bad for blowing her off but her personality was just too bubbly for me to be around right now.

My phone started ringing again right away. I bumped into someone as I pulled my phone out of my pocket again. I glanced at the person briefly and noticed spiky, fiery red hair and emerald green eyes.

I lingered on those eyes for a few brief seconds before tearing my eyes away to stare back at the street in front of me and answered my phone.

"I mean it Kairi! Leave me alone!"

She tried calling again a few seconds later and I pressed decline before turning my phone off.

"Hey!"

I didn't realize the person was addressing me so I kept walking without paying attention to the voice.

"Hey blondie! Where's the fire?"

I halted when I heard blondie. There were lots of blonde people on the street but I knew I was the one they were referring to.

I turned to acknowledge them and was surprised when I recognized the guy I had just bumped into. I noted the bright red color of his hair again and threw a snarky reply his way.

"On your head apparently."

He looked surprised form a few seconds before throwing a smirk my way.

"Nice one kid. Think of that all on your own?"

Everything about this guy radiated over confidence. It pissed me off.

"Well, you made fun of my hair so I figured I might as well return the favor."

With that said, I turned and started walking away from him but for some reason he walked with me.

"I wasn't making fun of your hair kid. I actually like the color. And I took what you said as a compliment. The color of my hair is pretty awesome don't ya think?"

_Arrogant bastard… Go away… I'll never admit it's actually kinda cool…_

"Sorry but no. I wouldn't be caught dead with hair like that. If that's all you wanted to know, you can go away now."

I saw him chuckle silently out of the corner of my eye and he shook his head.

"Actually, you looked depressed and I was worried. You don't have to be an ass."

I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Why? You don't even know me."

Everything about him pissed me off and now he was making me feel guilty for thinking bad about him.

_Who the hell is this guy?_

He shrugged and winked at me.

"Just a concerned citizen blondie."

I glared at him and looked away. I hated being called blondie but I didn't bother telling him my name. It's not like I was ever going to see him again.

"Nothing to be concerned about. Just running away from the hell hole I call home."

_Why the hell did I just tell him that? It's none of his business…_

To be honest I felt comfortable talking to this guy but that doesn't mean I need to go tell him everything about myself.

"A runaway huh? I tried that once. It didn't work out the way I planned… Go back home kid. You might regret it if you don't."

_Mind your own damn business!_

"You have no idea what you're talking about so stop acting like you do. There's no way I'm going back…now leave me alone!"

I sped up my pace and tried to get away from him but he kept pace with me. He grabbed the shoulder of my injured arm and I jerked away from him.

"Don't touch me!"

I laced my words with venom and took a defensive stance.

His eyes widened in shock before his face relaxed into a gentler expression that took me off guard.

"Go home kid. Whatever you're running away from isn't as bad as you think."

I glared at him before giving a resigned sigh. Some part of me trusted him though I knew I couldn't go home.

I'd tell him I was going home but I had every intention of crashing at Sora and Riku's place tonight.

"If it'll get you off my back fine…"

I stepped around him and headed back in the direction I had come from. I didn't look back as he called after.

"You'll thank me for this blondie!"

_Yea… Right…_

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><p>I kicked at a rock for a few blocks as I headed to Sora and Riku's apartment. A chill went up my spine as I got closer and closer to my neighborhood.<p>

They lived a block before me so it was a little too close for comfort but Dad didn't know any of my friends so it wasn't like he would find me there.

I considered calling them to let them know I was coming but I knew as soon as I turned my phone on I would be bombarded with missed calls and voice mails from Kairi.

It's not like they would turn me away if I turned up unannounced. They knew what my dad did to me. They were the only ones though. Kairi and Namine just thought that we didn't get along and argued a lot and that's all they needed to know. Why worry them?

A car horn snapped me out of my reverie and I realized I was on my street…

_What the hell am I doing here…?_

I must've taken what that guy said to heart and went home unconsciously.

I started to turn around and head back in the direction of Sora and Riku's place but I stopped myself and looked back at my house.

_Maybe he's right…Maybe it's really not that bad… Maybe Dad and I can talk it out…_

I swallowed nervously before walking to my force and letting myself inside. All the lights were off so I thought that maybe Dad had left.

I breathed a sigh of relief and stepped into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water. I froze in my tracks when I saw my Dad sitting in a kitchen chair in the dark.

He glared up at me and I smiled nervously.

"Hey Dad…"

He was standing in front of me before I even knew that he stood up. He clasped his hand around my throat and pushed me up against the wall so hard that all the breath in my body whooshed out of me.

"Who taught you to run away like a coward boy! It sure as hell wasn't me! If you ever run away from me again I will flay you within an inch of your life!"

Dad's face, flushed with anger and hatred, was so close that his spit rained down on my face. He tightened the strangled hold that he had on me and I fought for air.

I tried to voice an apology or anything to make him let go but I couldn't. It was impossible.

"Are you afraid of me Roxas! Do you think you don't deserve to be treated this way! Well you're wrong! You want me to show what real fear is boy!"

I gasped for breath and shook my head frantically. I had never seen him this mad and I was afraid for my life.

With a look of utter contempt, Dad let me loose and I fell to the floor coughing violently and gasping for air.

The relief I felt when air entered my lungs was like heaven. I glared up at Dad who was staring me like I was something foul and disgusting.

"T-That… wasn't n-necessary… Dad…"

Seconds before that he seemed to be walking away, but as soon as I said that he grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and threw a forceful punch at my left eye.

I felt blood rush to the area as it started to swell. Come morning I would have a black eye. I would have to come up with some believable story.

Dad's voice was calm and even when he spoke to me.

"You bring this on yourself Roxas…"

He dropped his hand from my shirt and looked at me sadly before going somewhere else in the house. I quietly walked to my room and locked the door behind me.

I grabbed a bag and stuffed some clothes in it before slowly easing my window open.

It had been insane to think that we could work something out. I didn't look back. I had no intention of going back.

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><p><strong>Poor Roxas… <strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

**(ignore this if you wish. It's not important at all.)**

**Okay so time to explain my writer's block hysteria over the past few days.**

**Bethany: Paige? What's wrong?**

**Me: I can't write anymore…**

**Bethany: I thought you liked this story?**

**Me: I do… I love it… The words just aren't coming to me…**

**Bethany: Give it some time. You'll figure it out.**

**Me: No! I'm done! I'm done writing! I'm done with everything! This time for good! No one likes my stuff anyways! My writing, my art, my photography! It's all crap!**

**Bethany: That's not true and you know it. Everyone on DA likes your stuff and you last story was a big success.**

**Me: Well I'm convinced the people on DA are blind and Complete 180 was a fluke! I'm done with it all! I'm dropping out of school and I'm gonna work at the bookstore the rest of my life. It's all I'm good for…**

**Bethany: Paige if you give up everything I will never speak to you again. If you don't sit down and type the second chapter I will stab a knife into your throat and bleed you out slowly, completely ignoring your pleas for mercy. Understand?**

**Me: … That's it! Bethany thank you so much! *goes and starts typing***

**Bethany: Thank you? For threatening your life? What's it?**

**Me: Yes! You're a great best friend! You made me feel afraid so I can sorta understand how Roxas feels now. That was the problem!**

**Bethany: Anytime…**

**Heh… I'm sorta irrational sometimes… and over dramatic… and have no confidence in myself…**

**Hope everyone has a great Christmas! ;D**


	3. Chase

Cornered

**Kingdom hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**Is everyone having good Christmas? I know I am (Sorta)! Christmas morning with Scott, then after opening our gifts to each other we went to his parents house (Where I proceeded to be glared at for 3 hours…) afternoon hanging out with friends, and I just got back from my Mother's house for Christmas dinner. It's been awhile since the whole family has gotten together. It was sad but it was nice at the same time.**

**Anyways this was ready to be posted 2 days ago but I'm banned from doing anything writing related around holidays so had to wait until now when I have nothing else to do. Sorry guys!**

**This chapter is mostly a dream and it's kinda… graphic? I guess is the word I'd use.**

**AkuRoku~~**

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><p>"I found a toothbrush you can use Roxas."<p>

Sora stepped into the bathroom and smiled at me as he leaned against the counter.

"Thanks…"

I took the toothbrush from him and ignored his questioning gaze as I turned the faucet on and squirted toothpaste onto the bristles.

"…So…What happened…?"

I briefly glanced at Sora and shrugged his question off. I felt his worried stare and started brushing more vigorously to relieve my frustration.

"You've got a shiner the size of a baseball Roxas. Don't try to act like it's nothing."

I spit into the sink and turned the faucet off. Sora's eyes never left me as I stepped around him and headed towards the couch.

"Don't worry about it Sora. I'm fine."

I traded my jeans for a pair of sweats and stripped my shirt off before collapsing onto the lumpy couch. It was far from comfortable but it would have to do.

"Where's Riku?"

I tried to steer the conversation in another direction but Riku decided to emerge from the hall as soon as I said that.

"Right here. What the fuck happened to your face?"

His tone was rude but he smiled at me in a concerned way.

"Tell me what happened to yours first Riku."

He chuckled and flipped me off.

"Don't be jealous."

Sora was my best friend but one thing I liked better about Riku was that he never tried to make me talk about what happened at home. If I wanted to talk, he was all ears but he never pestered me like Sora did. And Sora wasn't going to let Riku's subtle change of subject derail him.

"Roxas our offer still stands. I really think that you sho—"

"Sora we've talked about this! It's not going to happen so just drop it. All I want to do is go to sleep! Please."

Sora's mouth clicked shut and he glared at me before sighing in defeat.

"Fine. But we will talk about this in the morning. Come on Riku."

Riku shrugged his shoulders at me as he started to follow Sora. I saw him grab Sora's hips as they walked down the hall and I threw a pillow at them.

"And keep the noise down! I didn't get any sleep last time!"

The last thing I needed was to hear them going at it all night.

"Don't blame me. I can't help how vocal Sora is."

Riku looked back with a smirk before shutting the bedroom door. I groaned at the visual that had given me and pulled the other pillow over my head.

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><p>"<em>Roxas…"<em>

_I heard my name echoing from the tunnel on my left so I quickly veered right. My cold limbs screamed at me but I gritted my teeth and kept running._

_I heard flapping, creaking, slithering, and scratching as whatever was giving chase pursued me._

"_Roxas…"_

_My name sounded in front of me and I turned into the tunnel on my left._

_All of sudden everything went silent and I stopped running. I listened closely trying to pin point it's location. _

_A brittle snapping sound like dry twigs and sand sounded faintly behind me and I took off in a dead sprint._

_A door appears before me and I slam into it, wrenching it open without a moment's hesitation and haul myself through. I jerk it close and try to lock it but there's no lock._

_I turn around, looking for an escape but I find myself in a never ending dimly lit hallway._

_Cackling laughter sounds behind me and I lunge away from the door and careen down the hallway as fast as my wobbly legs allow me._

_I reach a T-shaped intersection. Both ways look exactly the same and I don't know which path to choose._

_Thins tendrils of shadows tentatively reach out to me. Far behind me, the door slowly creaks open._

"_Oh Roxas…"_

_The farther I go, the darker it gets and the amount of shadows increases and grows. Soon I'm running blind and I have to thrust my hands out in front of me in fear of hitting a wall. Someone. Something._

_After a short while in the darkness I'm not sure if I've missed other halls or doors or if I'm even in a hallway anymore._

_My footsteps sound different, no longer a tight echo. I reach out a hand and I don't feel walls in any direction. I'm completely exposed, utterly lost, and stumbling through impenetrable darkness. Panic starts to take hold and my breath comes in ragged gasps. I feel dizzy and lightheaded so I hunch over and put my head between my knees._

_As my breathing slows, I hear a steady, quiet rumble to my right. It sounds like rushing water. _

_I head towards the sound, still keeping my hands out so I won't run into anything. After a few minutes of fast walking, I trip and fall forwards onto the bottom of a stone staircase, slamming my palm onto the edge of one of the steps._

_The pain of the impact shoots through my body and I curl up on the gritty steps, clutching my hand until it passes. Then I get back on my feet and start to climb._

_As I ascend, the sound of rushing water grows louder. A dim, ruddy glow comes from somewhere ahead of me. At the top, the stairs taper off as they lead to a narrow outcropping, where the path simply ends. I peer over the edge and see a canyon twenty feet deep. A river flows through the center of the canyon, but it isn't water. It's blood._

"_There you are Roxas…"_

_The voice echoes from the darkness at the bottom of the steps. I whirl to face whoever was approaching, but the only thing I see are two luminous eyes getting slowly closer._

_I look down at the seething river of blood, then back at the approaching eyes. I jump._

_There's a moment of weightless queasiness, then I hit the surface. The crimson liquid was thicker than water, so I didn't sink down too far. After a few hard kicks, I break the surface._

_I scan the edge of the canyon but the eyes weren't following me. The thought that it couldn't reach me here flitted through my mind and I might have stumbled upon the perfect escape._

_I begin to swim with the current, moving to the center of the river and downstream. After a while, the cliffs on either side slowly shrink down until the shores of the river are only slight hills of congealed blood. I was tired of swimming and I decide to head for shore._

_But the blood is so thick it feels like swimming through oatmeal. After a few minutes, I've only made it halfway to the riverbank. Then the current picks up. The surface gets choppy. Quick slaps of bubbling red splash my face. A little bit makes it into my mouth and the rusty metallic taste makes me gag._

_Then I see a large fin, like a shark's, just out of the blood just twenty feet away. I stop swimming and try to keep my head above the surface with as little movement as possible. The fin veers off to the right and makes a slow, wide circle around me. It's glossy, pitch-black, like obsidian, with jagged edges._

_For a moment, its head breaks the surface and the luminous eyes from before are glaring back at me. It cuts through the strong current and thick blood easily as it circles, getting closer with each revolution._

_All of my attention is on the fin, so it takes a while for me to look past the tightening circle to see the choppy current downriver. Then my ears pick up the deep roaring sound of a waterfall. Or would that be a bloodfall?_

_The obsidian shark is close enough that I can see rows of diamond teeth. I make a break for the riverbank, my arms and legs flailing wildly. But the creature speeds up and launches itself into the air, then descends on me in a wall of diamond teeth._

_The shark just barley misses me as I go over the falls._

_When I hit, I shoot all the way to the bottom of the blood river. For a moment, the blood pounds down on me from above and holds me pinned there. My lungs scream for air and I think to myself, Is this it? Am I going to die now?_

_But I force myself up against the pressure of the blood and kick off from the bottom as hard as I lungs burn for air and I clench my teeth to keep from taking an involuntary gasp. _

_Finally I break the surface and swim wearily to the riverbank. The bank is covered in ice and snow and is stained red as I climb up onto a snowdrift, panting and coughing. It's freezing but at least I can breathe._

"_You really should stop running Roxas…"_

_A spasm of fear rolls through me at the whisper in my ear but there's nothing there. I pull myself up onto my knees, looking for an escape._

_From the blood riverbank, the snow-covered field stretches out past my line of vision, broken only by scattered outcroppings of jagged ice. The sky is a dull gray, and mottled black storm clouds scuttle quickly from horizon to horizon. I try to get to my feet but I stumble in the deep snow and fall over._

_I feel a cold, hard hand close around the back of my head and lift me into the air. I'm slowly turned around and I finally see who has been after me._

_I gasp at the grotesquely misshaped figure of my father. His eyes are the same ones that have been following me the whole time._

_I struggle against his cold grip and he lets go. I drop to the ground, then push my way through the snow, first at a stumble, then on hands and knees._

_My father smiles at me dementedly and shakes his finger at me._

"_Ah ah ah, I don't think so Roxas…"_

_All of sudden my body goes limp and descends upon me, looping a thin wire around each of my wrists. He tugs on them and they cut into my skin and draw blood. I suck in a breath and swallow a scream as he stretches my arms out to either side._

_He grins wide enough for me to see his sharp little teeth. He pulls something out of the shadows around him and it takes me a few moments to realize it's my mother._

_He grabs her by the neck and holds her at arm's length. Her eyes are rolled back in the back of her head so that only whites show. Foamy yellow spit dribbles from her lips. She's covered in scratches and bruises._

"_You did this to her Roxas… You drove her to this Roxas… You killed her Roxas…"_

_I shook my head frantically and whimpered like a wounded dog._

"_N-No… I didn't…"_

_His demented smile got even wider and he started to tug me closer with the wires. I turned my head away in fear as I got closer to him and my dead mother._

_He stops pulling but he's holding the wires so tight that my arms are stretched out to the sides as far as they will go. Every time I strain at the wires, it slices deeper into my skin. Blood run downs my forearms and drips from my elbows to the snow covered ground._

_He regards my mother for a moment, then drops her to the floor._

"_Now Roxas… How should I punish you for killing your mother…?"_

_I struggle against the wire until my arms are slippery with blood, but I can't shake the loops. They have cut so far into my flesh that they're embedded into my skin._

"_Please stop! I'm sorry… I'll do anything! Just let me go…"_

_H cocked his head and widened his smile._

"_No my boy. You're already doing what I want you to do. Suffer. Which I am enjoying immensely."_

_He tugs on the wires and I cry out in pain._

"_On your feet Roxas!"_

_I struggle to pick myself up off the ground, but I feel dizzy from blood loss and collapse onto my stomach._

_Father laughs, a sound hard and shrieking, like a buzz saw on sheet metal. Then he lifts up one foot and shoves it down on my back, pressing my face into the snow. I struggle weakly as he continues to push down on me. I sink deeper and deeper into the drift. It seems bottomless. Everything faded to black._

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><p><strong>Sorry if you were disappointed by this. I know it's mostly a dream but I really<strong> **like how it turned out.**

**I tried to make it disturbing to read and give visuals. Did I succeed? Yes? No? Kinda?**

**Reviews please. :O)**

**So I know I usually put something interesting or funny here but I don't really know what to say…**

**Oh! For those of you that don't know, I'm a horrible cook. Like literally, it should be illegal for me to cook. Anyways, I was trying to help my mom cook dinner… I got banned from the kitchen cause I burnt the rolls…**

**Another funny thing is that I'm really short. The ceiling light in me and my boyfriend's bedroom blew out today so I went to get the step stool so I could change it. Scott offered to help but I told him I could do it… I stood on my tip toes on the step stool and I still wasn't tall enough… He's still laughing at me…**

**Merry Christmas everyone! XD Love ya guys!**


	4. Worried

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**So last month my little brother broke my violin and I've been violinless since then cause it couldn't be fixed properly DX But today I ordered me a new one so I'm a happy girl! XD Should be here the first week of January! XD And after I tune it and everything, the first thing I'm gonna play is Danse Macabre! Love that song! I remember playing it for the first time in high school and I was like what the hell is this shit! But now it rolls off of the fingers like it's nothing! XD**

**Hah! Finally got far enough ahead in drawing the story so now I'll be able to update more frequently! You have no idea how many PM's I've gotten demanding to know what happened to my fast updates. Apparently they didn't read my AN at the bottom of the first chapter but oh well.**

**Yay! Axel's back in this one! After Roxas, Axel is by far my favorite character! I mean with his eyes and his tattoos and his attitude and his use of fire and his sadness at Roxas not remembering him and his… I'm rambling. I could talk about Kingdom Hearts for hours so I'll stop now.**

**AkuRoku~~**

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><p>I suddenly break through the other side of the snow bank and I'm lying on Sora and Riku's lumpy coach. I'm drenched in sweat and my heart is thudding erratically. I push myself up into a sitting position and look around me. Filled with foreboding, I waited for <em>something<em> to happen.

Nothing moved.

The malevolent creature of my father didn't fall down upon me. No luminous eyes shined in the dark. No shadows swarmed. Nothing bad happened at all.

Aside from me, Sora, and Riku the apartment was empty. Nothing was out to get to me. I was safe.

I fell back down onto the couch with a heavy sigh of relief. I leaned my head back into the couch and shut my eyes; waiting for my heart to regain its steady rhythm. Suddenly, something cold and slick touched my cheek and I fell with a yelp of surprise onto the floor.

I glared up at Sora who was leaning over the back of the couch with a bottle of water extended towards me. I saw the amusement in his eyes but he held back his laughter. Good thinking on his part because I was considering violence if so much as a chuckle escaped his lips.

"Man, I didn't mean to scare you Roxas. Bad dream again?"

I snatched the bottle out of his hand and chugged half the bottle in one gulp before dignifying him with a response.

"Yea, well you never make a sound when you're walking around. It's fucking creepy Sora. And yea, I had the dream again except this time I ended up in a river of blood with a shark… It's always the same beginning and ending though…"

I chugged the rest of the water and plopped down onto the couch. Sora sat down next to me and I remembered him saying that we would talk. The water bottle crackled as I squeezed it in my hand, waiting for the unwanted onslaught of questions.

Sora looked at the pulverized water bottle then raised an eyebrow at me.

"You alright Roxas?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose with my empty hand and growled through clenched teeth.

"Just get it over with Sora…"

I pushed myself off of the couch and headed into the kitchen so I could throw the bottle away. Then I leaned against the kitchen counter and waited.

Sora sighed and looked at me pleadingly.

"Roxas… Why won't you talk to me? We're best friends. I tell you everything so why can't you just trust me a little bit and con—"

"Because you can't possibly understand Sora! You don't get the shit beat out of you day after fucking day! You're father's not crazy and you're mother didn't kill herself because she couldn't handle raising you! I've told you all you need to know! So you can take the pity party/ counseling and shove it on someone who actually wants it! "

I was gripping the edge of the counter so hard that my knuckles turned white. I felt bad for yelling at Soar but it was true. He couldn't possibly understand so I didn't see the point in laying any more of my problems on him.

Sora didn't feel the same way. His gaze set into a steely glare and an uncharacteristic edge touched his voice.

"Well Riku and I offered to let you move in here but you said no without even thinking about it and we haven't seen you since until last night. You're keeping Namine and Kairi in the dark so they are worried sick but we can't tell them anything according to you. I'm fucking trying Roxas but all you do is push your friends away when things get worse then they already are! We want to understand Sora. We want to help but it's hard to help someone who disappears for a fuckin month now isn't it?"

If guilt was tangible I would've sagged under the weight he had put on me. I knew I had been out of touch with my friends but I hadn't realized a month had passed… It wasn't like I had completely disappeared though…

"It's not like that… I just needed some space but I'm here… You guys are still my friends…"

Sora snorted in disbelief and I had to look away from the bitter disappointment in his eyes.

"Friends? Right… So you know what happened to Namine last week right?"

He looked at me expectantly but I had no clue what had happened but I knew it wasn't anything bad. If something bad had happened I would've heard… would've remembered… right?

"That's what I thought. Well for your information, she got her acceptance letter from that art school she's been dreaming about for years. We celebrated the day after she got her letter but you were getting some much needed space apparently. Obviously much more important."

She was an amazing artist and deserved to go there. I remembered her saying something about being wait-listed a few months ago… I guess a spot opened up…? I couldn't remember the last time I had talked to Namine…

_I'll call her later… Apologize for acting like a jerk…_

"Oh, and just so you know, Kairi thinks you hate her now cause you've been such an ass lately. Called me yesterday in tears about you yelling at her to leave you the fuck alone. How could you do that Roxas? She was _worried_ about you. We're all _worried _about you. You might be acting like an ass but we're still your friends Roxas. When are you going to realize we're the only ones you've got? You need to stop pushing us aw—"

"Alright I fucking get it Sora! Okay? I'm sorry! Is that what you want to hear? Or do you want a fuckin formally written apology letter? Heaven forbid that I want to be alone cause I don't to drag you guys down with my problems right? I get that you're worried and want to help but the sooner you realize there is nothing you can do, the better. He's my father Sora. I can't escape him and you definitely can't save me from him. I'm gonna be bound by him until he dies or he kills me! Whichever happens first! So excuse me for not wanting to drag you guys into that! And I really doubt including the girls in this will do any good."

My voice cracked as I finished my tirade. I wasn't looking at Sora but I could feel the pity coming off of him in waves. It was all too much. I grabbed my jacket and stormed out of the apartment as Sora yelled after me to come back.

* * *

><p>I got strange and curious looks as I stormed through the streets. I guess I couldn't blame them. I had a black eye, tears were leaking out of my eyes, and I had neglected to put on a shirt before leaving Sora's apartment. I would've zipped my jacket up, but the zipper had broken ages ago and I didn't have the money to buy a new one. And if I asked Dad for money to buy a new jacket… I shuddered at the thought.<p>

I hunched my shoulders up and hung my head to avoid the stares that were aimed at me. I tried to make my body language say leave me the fuck alone…

"Blondie? Hey! Hey kid! Wait up!"

Apparently the message was lost in transmission… Then I recognized the voice, and the unfortunate nick names, and groaned. He was the last person I wanted to see. And I resented the fact that, for whatever reason, I felt safety envelope me knowing that he was near.

_What the fuck is up with that?_

I didn't acknowledge him. I hoped that if I ignored him he would think it wasn't me. That is just looked like me… The guy was persistent though.

"Hey blondie. Surprised to see you again. You're not running away again are you kid? Sure seems like it by the loo-"

"Why don't you just leave me the hell alone alright… whoever the hell you are…"

I didn't look at him but I saw him grin out of the corner of my eye.

"Name's Axel. Get it memorized."

_How big of an ego does this guy have?_

"Whatever… Just leave me alone…"

I knew from last time that that wouldn't work. I still tried though but he kept pace with me just like last time.

_Doesn't he have somewhere to be? Something to do? Other than pester me?_

I started to ask him just that but I stopped myself just in time and shut my mouth with a click. I was ignoring him. Not trying to start a conversation.

"What is your problem kid? Do you bite off every person's head that tries to talk to you? Or is it just me that pisses you off so much? Look blondie, I don't know what I did but I'm sorry. I'm really just worried is all."

It was the combination of being called kid and blondie and him sounding just like Sora that set me off.

"How many times do I have to tell you to leave me the fuck alone! I don't know what you're trying to do but all you're doing is annoying the living hell out of me! And it's not kid or blondie! My name's Roxas! Get it memorized!"

All my anger and frustration spilled out with my words and satisfaction rolled through me as I spat his words back at him.

He stepped back in surprise when I rounded on him and I noticed him take in my injured eye and the curiosity and worry that pooled in his eyes. My anger sizzled out as fast as it had flared up when I saw his expression. I just couldn't be mad when he looked like… that.

"Jesus ki-Roxas, what happened to you?"

He took a step towards me and reached out as if he was going to touch my face. I wasn't scared of him but an automatic reflex made me step away and glare at him.

He dropped his hand and my glare softened into a frown at his expression. I couldn't bring myself to talk to Sora, my best friend, but I feel totally at ease when this stranger I barely know asks me that.

I turned my face away from him and sighed before answering.

"…You're the one that told me to go back…"

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><p><strong>Yay! Axel! I love Axel… and I already covered that at the top. Umm so I'm thinking of starting the next chapter off from Axel's POV but I'm not sure. Has anyone read I Can Stop the Bleeding? If so did you like Axel's POV?<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

***squeals and jumps up and down excitedly* I got my hair highlighted today! It's been a year and a half since I last highlighted it and I'm so glad that they are back. My hair looks so dull without them! That's when Scott would say: No babe, you look beautiful no matter what. And then that's when I say: I call bullshit. Don't lie to me. And then a petty argument ensues that ends with him saying something sweet and making me forget what we were arguing about.**

**Anways~~ Leaving for Missouri in… 4 hours! XD Me, Scott, Bethany, and her boyfriend Michael do this every year right after Christmas and stay with Bethany's grandparents for a week. Even though we always hang out and have been on this trip since before any of us could drive the 4 of us in a car together for hours on end never gets old! XD So expect some funny stories in the next few chapters I upload. Mainly it's the 4 of us arguing over what to listen to cause our music taste is so diverse. Scott: rap Me: anything but country Bethany: country Michael: death metal: D Eak! This week is going to be so much fun! **


	5. Pity

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**Ahh~ I don't remember that last time I slept in… Hell I don't remember the last time I slept that well period. I love Missouri! If it weren't for school and work I would not be going back home anytime soon.**

**Let's see, about the chapter… I typed it up while we were driving so there are probably more mistakes than usual. Sorry about that. Also, haven't gotten many reviews on the last chapter so I couldn't think over your guys's opinions. I just went ahead and started this from Axel's POV so hopefully you guys like it.**

**AkurRoku~~**

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><p><em>I hope everything turned out okay for that kid...<em>

Once again I found myself thinking about that blonde kid from yesterday. I mentally shook myself and started to think of the task at hand.

I was on my way to help my friend Larxene move into her new apartment. There are a million other things I'd rather do, but I owed her the favor and… Larxene has blond hair… Just like the kid… but his was a warmer color…

That's how it's been since he walked away from me yesterday. I couldn't get him off of my mind… And I didn't understand why!

_You're just curious as to what happened to him. He looked like hell when you saw him._

It was more than that though. Only a small amount of my thoughts were worried about him. Most of them were full of curiosity about him. But the main question I had for myself, was would I ever see him again?

_Dumbass! You should've asked for his name! Right… Like he would've told you even if you did…_

Why I wanted to see him again I had no idea, but I did. Every time I saw a head of blond hair in the streets I would get excited, but every time I got a closer a look disappointment set in.

_Stop looking for someone you're never gonna see again! It's pointless and pathetic!_

Just because I wanted to see him didn't mean that he was going to appear in fr—

But that's just what he did. I just happened to look across the street and there he was. He was staring at the ground so I couldn't see his face but it was him alright.

I made my way across the street and called after him. He ignored me until I was walking beside him. He gave me the cold shoulder and was just as rude as he had been yesterday. I felt like the only thing I had heard him say was to leave him the hell alone. It would take a lot more than that to dissuade me though.

"Name's Axel. Get it memorized."

I worked my name into the conversation so that he would give me his but it didn't work. He told me to leave him alone again and it pissed me off.

"What is your problem kid? Do you bite off every person's head that tries to talk to you? Or is it just me that pisses you off so much? Look blondie, I don't know what I did but I'm sorry. I'm really just worried is all."

I might have been pissed but my tone didn't sound mad at all. So when he suddenly rounded on me and started yelling it took me by surprise.

"How many times do I have to tell you to leave me the fuck alone! I don't know what you're trying to do but all you're doing is annoying the living hell out of me! And it's not kid or blondie! My name's Roxas! Get it memorized."

The only thing I picked up was his name.

_Roxas…_

I probably could've come up with some witty response but the only thing on my mind was whose ass do I kick for giving him the black eye he had. I couldn't explain the protectiveness I felt towards him but it was there.

Without thinking I reached for him.

"Jesus ki-Roxas, what happened to you?"

His face hardened into a glare and he stepped away from me. I couldn't blame him. Someone had hurt him so why would he accept the touch of a stranger?

His glare melted into a frown and he sighed as he turned his face away from me.

"…You're the one that told me to go back…"

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><p>I held my breath as I waited for his reaction to that. I waited and waited but he said nothing. I peaked over at him out of the corner of my eye and was shocked by the pained expression on his face. I couldn't tell what he was thinking though and the suspense was killing me.<p>

"Well? Say _something_…"

He blinked a few times and cleared his head with a shake.

"Who...?"

_So it's going to be the simple inane questions…_

"My dad…"

"How long?"

"As long as I can remember…"

I waited for him to say something but he didn't so I turned around and started to walk away from him. I was going to stand there as he judged me. It wasn't any of his busi—

He grabbed my arm and spun me around so I was facing him.

"Why didn't you say anything yesterday when I told you to go back!"

He practically hissed in my face and his grip on my arm wasn't hard but I still should have some sort of semblance of fear or a need to defend myself but I didn't. Still, I didn't feel a need to answer to him and I wrenched my arm out of his grasp.

"And say what? If I go home my dear old dad will proceed to beat the shit out of me. It was none of your concern! It still isn't your concern! God! Why am I even talking to you?"

"It is my concern because it's my fault you got a black eye! I didn't realize what I was sending you back to kid! How do you think that makes me feel!"

"It doesn't matter to me how it makes _you_ feel! You're no one to me! And I knew what I was going back to! It's my fault… It's always been my fault…"

His enraged expression faded into pity when I said that. I hated it. I hated it when people pitied me. I hated it when people felt sorry for me.

"Why's it your fault Roxas?"

Even his voice had pity in it. I tried to ignore how much I liked it when he said my name but I couldn't.

"It's none of your concern…"

He sighed in frustration but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes.

"You're a stubborn one aren't you? …Do you need a place to stay?"

I looked away from him and rolled my eyes when he called me stubborn but I looked back at him so fast when he offered me a place to stay that my neck cracked. At first I felt grateful at the unexpected, and undeserved, kindness he was offering me, but then I bristled in anger.

"I don't want, or need, your help! So you can take your pity and shove it asshole!"

I didn't care that he felt guilty for getting me hurt. Even if I wanted to accept his help I couldn't so it was a moot point.

He chuckled and I narrowed my eyes at him.

"I thought I told you to get my name memorized? It's Axel. Asshole's pretty close though. Alright… I know a lost cause when I see one."

I was completely taken off guard by his behavior. Just a minute ago he was angry. Now he's cracking jokes? Now he's walking away?

Ever since I had met him I had been telling him to leave me the hell alone but now that he was leaving I didn't want him to go.

"Wait!"

I didn't realize I said it out loud until it was too late. He looked back at me surprised but then he grinned. I shoved down the thought that I liked his smile as he walked back towards me.

_Don't even go there Roxas…_

He stood in front of me with that smug grin and waited for me to say something. I had nothing to say.

He chuckled and grabbed my hand.

"Wait! What are yo—"

He pulled out a pen with his other hand and scribbled something before I thought to pull away.

"Call me later. If you just wanna talk or if you need somewhere to sleep."

I looked down at the seven black numbers on my hand and made a fist around them. I wanted to tell him that there was no way in hell I was going to call him. I wanted to tell him a lot of things, but I just stood there looking like I didn't know how to open my mouth.

"I'm busy tonight…"

It was a lie but I didn't want him to think that he was in control of the situation.

He grinned again and shrugged.

"So am I."

I stood there nailed to the spot as he turned and walked away, digesting what had just happened.

I finally recovered from my shock and the effects of his smile and yelled after him.

"I won't call! Not…ever!"

He looked back with another grin and I glared at him.

"My couch is always open Roxie."

He winked and I felt a blush creep its way under my cheeks.

_I'm gonna kill him!_

"My names Roxas!"

He just waved me off before turning a corner and disappearing from my sight.

* * *

><p>I walked around until I calmed down before going back to Sora and Riku's apartment. When I opened the door, Sora threw himself at me in a vice grip.<p>

"Roxas, I'm so sorry! Please don't be mad!"

I struggled to get into the apartment and shut the door with Sora clinging to me but somehow I managed.

"Let the guy breathe Sora. You know how Roxas is. He gets made. He takes a walk. Everything's fine again."

I looked at Riku gratefully. He sounded calm but I didn't miss the way his eyes narrowed at the sight of Sora hugging me.

Thankfully Sora let go before Riku really got mad. Sora still looked nervous so I ruffled his hair and tried to reassure him.

"I'm not mad Sora. I am irritated though but not at you."

Sora's interest was piqued and he stared at me curiously.

"What happened?"

I groaned as I sat on the couch and ran my fingers through my hair.

"I met this asshole yesterday who convinced me to go home yesterday. I ran into him again while I was out… He knows about my dad. He offered me a place to stay whenever I needed it and gave me his number. Fuckin asshole…"

Sora and Riku shared a look and for some reason I got nervous.

"What?"

Sora grinned at me and it gave me the creeps.

"So you like him then?"

_Something must be wrong with my hearing…_

"Umm…what?"

Sora rolled his eyes and Riku chuckled.

"I asked if you liked him."

I blinked a few times and tried to understand the question.

Do I like him? No Sora! He's a jerk with an overly inflated ego. I'm pretty sure I called him an asshole. A few times actually."

_I should've kept my freakin mouth shut!_

Sora rolled his eyes and tossed a pillow at me.

"I know! He's such an asshole. A complete stranger letting you crash on his couch whenever the need arises. Who does that? You may have called him an asshole, but you had this sappy look on your face while you were talking about him."

I groaned and threw the pillow back at him.

"Harhar very funny Sora… He just feels sorry for me. That's all. Even if I was interested, which I'm not, I'm not cut out to be in a relationship so just drop it."

Riku slapped me on the back of the head and I turned to glare at him.

"What the hell was that for!"

He smirked and shrugged his shoulders.

"Trying to knock some sense into you. Hell, I feel sorry for you Roxas but that doesn't mean I'm going to let you crash here all the time. He doesn't just pity you. You're too annoying to put up with just out of pity."

_You didn't see the look on his face…_

I mentally shook myself and slapped him on the stomach.

"That's because you're an asshole Riku and you're more worried about getting laid than about your friend."

He shrugged and tried to hit me on the head again but I dodged out of the way this time.

"Hey, a guy has his priorities Roxas."

I rolled my eyes and started to say something but then I noticed the look on Sora's face.

"What is it Sora?"

He looked away and shook his head as he sniffled like he was holding back tears.

"It's just… I worry about you and I want you to be happy…. Never mind. Forget it. It's nothing…"

His tone was heart wrenching and I wanted to comfort him somehow.

"Tell me Sora. What is it?"

He twiddled his fingers and shrugged his shoulders.

"He sounds like a nice guy Roxas… It couldn't hurt to call him, could it?"

I groaned when I realized what he was getting at.

"Sora… I don't need to call him. If I need somewhere to stay I come here, which I rarely do. There's no need to call him."

He turned to look at me and his expression was beyond pitiful.

"Please…?"

I was taken aback by his pleading tone and I groaned in defeat.

"Fine! I'll call him! Are you happy now?"

His face went from being pitiful to being split in half by a blinding smile.

"Thanks Roxas! Call him now!"

_Fuckin faker!_

I groaned and pulled my phone out of my pocket and started dialing the number inked onto my hand.

* * *

><p><strong>Haha Sora's manipulative! I'll save the phone call and other things for the next chapter. I'm about to go out and do some shopping with Bethany and her grandma!<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

**Haha so I've always been an itty bitty thing and I'm one of those people who can eat tons and tons of food and never gain any weight. Like I literally haven't gained any weight since freshmen year of high school. But if I'm going to get fat on anything it's gonna be the beefy crunch burrito from Taco Bell! We stopped at every Taco Hell on the way to Missouri yesterday. I think I ate like 10 yesterday and I've already eaten 3 today. I've got a problem… but it's so damn good!**

**Also, I want to address something. Someone sent me a PM asking me if I could do a SoRoku story and there are 2 reasons why I'm saying no and I'd figure I'd answer here in case anyone else thinks of asking for a request.**

**1) Absolutely refuse to put Sora and Roxas together. Ever. Period. End of Story. One, they are practically the same person so eww and two, Roxas belongs to Axel and only Axel. I don't really care who Sora's with but if I'm writing it will not be Roxas.**

**2)I'm not taking requests atm. Eventually, yes but not now. When I do decide to entertain requests I will post it on my profile and/or at the bottom of a chapter. So if you have a request save it till then.**

**Okay. Time to go shopping now! :D**


	6. Offer

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me.**

**Haha we just spent the last 2 hours looking through our old pokemon cards we found in the basement! I'm surprised Bethany's grandparents held onto those! We haven't touched those in what? 8 years? Wow! Talk about a blast from the past! Lol that's right! I was a pokemon nerd and damn proud of it!**

**Okay, enough of that.**

**AkuRoku~~**

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><p>My nerves got the better of me the first time I dialed his number and it started ringing. I hung up right away and earned a glare from Sora.<p>

"If you don't call him I will and we both know you don't want that to happen."

I recoiled at the thought of Sora calling him. Who knew what he would say. I sighed and dialed his number again.

Secretly I hoped Axel wouldn't answer my call. Instead, he answered on the fourth ring.

"Hello?"

Hearing his voice calmed me down a bit but I still hesitated, unsure of what to say.

"I-I might take you up on your offer…"

I tried to sound confident and sure of myself but I stumbled over my words and I mentally cursed myself.

"Roxas."

He smiled as he said my name. I could just hear it in his voice.

_How the hell do you hear a smile!_

_Why's he so happy to hear from me…?_

"Thought you weren't going to call. Ever."

I could just picture the smug look on his face.

I hated that I was eating my words. I hated Axel for rubbing it in. I hated Sora and Riku for putting me through this.

I opened my mouth hoping something smart would come out.

"Well… Does your offer still stand?"

I heard him chuckle and I scowled.

"I told you my couch is always open didn't I? Where are you at? I'll pick you up."

I balked when he said that. I wanted to hang up but he would probably just call me back. And I'd have to face Sora's wrath if I did and I'd prefer not to die today.

I started to tell him the address but then I heard a voice in the background on his end.

"_You're not taking off already are you Axel? You just got here and we haven't even started yet!"_

It was a girl's voice and I had a good idea of what I was interrupting.

"Sorry. You did say you were busy today… Forget it. I'll stay where I'm at."

Sora glared at me and I flipped him off.

"Don't worry about her Roxas. Larxene's just too lazy to move into her new apartment by herself. Where are you at?"

"_I am not lazy!"_

I hesitated and chewed my lip nervously before rattling off their address after Sora nodded encouragingly.

"I'll be there as soon as I can Roxie."

I yelled that my name was Roxas but he had already hung up.

"So? How'd it go?"

I shoved my phone into my pocket, grabbed a pillow off of the couch and proceeded to beat Sora with it.

"Why. The. Hell. Did. You. Make. Me. Call. Him!"

I punctuated each word with a hit before collapsing onto the couch and burying my head in the pillow.

Sora started laughing and I aimed a kick in his direction but I didn't make any contact.

"S'not funny…"

He continued to laugh and Riku's low chuckle joined in.

_I'm gonna kill them…_

"Oh Riku, Roxas has got it bad!"

I threw a kick in his direction again and smiled in satisfaction when I heard a groan.

"I don't have anything! I can't believe you made me do that! What am I gonna do when he gets here?"

I felt like I was having a mental breakdown. I didn't even know this guy but he was coming to get me so that I could stay at his house! All because Sora and Riku thought that I had some sort of crush on him! Which I don't. I don't !

Not only cause I didn't know him either. Everything about him pissed me off. When I get to know him better it won't change a thing.

Not that I wanted to know more about him.

Since I didn't like what I'd seen on the surface, I doubted I would like what was lurking deep inside.

Only, that wasn't entirely true. I'd liked _a lot_ of what I'd seen.

Long, lean muscles down his arms, broad but relaxed shoulders, and a smile that was part playful, part seductive. I was in an uneasy alliance with myself, trying to ignore what had started to feel irresistible…

Stop! There's nothing irresistible about that asshole! Nothing! Not his eyes or his smile or… Fucking asshole! I hate him!

"I'm not going anywhere with him! When he gets here tell him he's got the wrong address. I'll be in your room."

I threw the pillow down and pushed myself off of the couch. I stopped when I got to the hallway though and turned to face them.

"You'll just send him in after me won't you…?"

Riku shrugged.

"I don't know about that but we would tell him that you refuse to come to the door."

_Fuckin traitors…_

Sora gave me a pleading look.

"Give him a chance Roxas."

I was ready to rip my hair I was so stressed out.

"A chance at what Sora? This isn't going to be some fairy tale where he sweeps me off my feet! All he's doing is giving me a place to stay! And now that I think about it, why would a complete stranger do that? He's probably some psychopath…"

I knew that wasn't true though. I knew that his offer was sincere. I just couldn't figure out why he was being so nice to me. After all, I had been a complete jerk to him.

"Well, if someone finds you dead in some alleyway we'll be sure to apologize."

I blinked a few times, completely taken by surprise by that statement.

"Well don't I feel loved…"

They both chuckled and I started to laugh with them until I heard a knock coming from the front door.

_Shit! I thought it would take him longer!_

A smile spilt Sora's face and he got up to answer the door. I had a hold of his arm before I even realized I had moved.

All traces of teasing and amusement vanished from Sora's eyes when he looked at me.

"Calm down Roxas. I call you later and if you really don't want to be there we'll come get you. Okay?"

I thought it over and figured it would have to do. I let him and grabbed my bag.

"Fine, but you aren't answering the door. The last thing I need is for you to say something unnecessary."

Before he could protest I wrenched the front door open and slammed it behind me. I didn't even glance at Axel as I walked past him down the stairs and out of the building.

He caught up to me quickly.

"What's wrong?"

I glanced at him for a second but quickly looked away.

"My friends are assholes…"

He chuckled and nodded.

"Aren't they all? May I ask where you're going?"

I stopped in my tracks and turned to look at him when I realized I didn't know.

"I'm not sure… I was just gonna walk with you until we got to your place…"

I stared over his shoulder so I wouldn't be affected by his smile. He inclined his head behind him.

"Well you can walk if you want but it'll be faster if I drive. Plus I'm starving and was gonna stop to get something to eat."

I narrowed my eyes when he approached a black vehicle and opened the passenger door for me.

"Well? Are you gonna get in?"

I stood rooted to the spot. There was no way I was getting in that car.

"You were walking earlier… Where'd the car come from?"

He smirked.

"Grand theft auto. It's a side hobby of mine."

He chuckled but when I didn't laugh he sighed.

"It's a friend of mine's. He owed me the favor. Would you please get in the car? It's cold and I'd rather you not freeze to death on my watch."

I hesitated, but only for a few seconds, before giving in and getting into the car. He shut my door and walked around to the drivers slide and slid in.

He looked over at me as he started the engine.

"You alright? You seem tense?"

I glanced at him out of the corner of my before turning to look out the window.

"You aren't a serial killer or anything are you?"

He laughed and put the car into reverse.

"Quit the habit last week actually."

I rolled my eyes.

"You aren't funny. I hope you know that."

Puncturing his overly inflated ego sounded like a fun thing to do.

"Of course I'm not funny. I'm fuckin hilarious."

_Cocky overconfident bastard!_

"Hmph…"

We lapsed into silence. I had nothing to say to him and must've known that I was open to talking. I felt cold but I refused to turn on the heat. I rubbed my arms a bit. He must've noticed because he turned the heat on.

"Let me know if you get too hot."

I just nodded and continued to look out the window. I waited for awkwardness to fill the car but it never happened. I hated how comfortable I felt around this guy. It was like he was a security blanket for me or something.

"Are you hungry?"

I shook my head but my stomach gave me away by growling. I saw him smirk out of the corner of my eye and I wanted nothing more than to wipe it away.

A few minutes later he parked in front of a diner I had been to a few times with my friends. At least I knew the food would be good. Maybe that would help distract me from thinking about how much this seemed like a date.

Opening my door for me made that really hard though.

"I can do it myself thank you!"

I stormed past him and into the diner. The hostess smiled at me.

"Just one?"

I started to nod but then Axel came in behind me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Two actually."

I saw a faint blush touch her cheeks when she saw Axel and for some reason it irritated me.

She fluttered her eyelashes and smiled at him. I might as well have been invisible.

"Right this way."

I glared at her and then him as we followed her to our table.

She set menu's down in front of us. She had other people to seat but she continued to smile at Axel.

"Let me know if there's anything I can do you for you. You're waitress will be with you shortly."

Axel rolled his eyes at me as she walked away.

"It's so annoying when they act like that."

I raised an eyebrow at him.

"I thought your ego would enjoy all the attention."

He shook his head but didn't say anything. I looked down at the menu and thought over what I wanted. I was tempted to get the most expensive thing on the menu just to piss him off but I wouldn't eat it.

"Hi! My name's Namine and I'll be your waitress today. Can I start you two off with something to drink?"

I mentally cursed myself when I heard Namine's voice. Apparently she had started working here without me knowing. There was a steel edge to her voice so I knew she was mad at me.

I peeked up at her with a sheepish smile.

"Hey Namine…"

She barely glanced at me.

"One glass of 'I'm a fucking loser' for you. And what can I get you sir?"

I groaned at her tone and had to force myself not to punch the amusement off of Axel's face.

"Two water's please."

She wrote the order down and glared at me before she turned and walked away.

"Who was that? An ex-girlfriend?"

I shook my head as I took a pen out of my pocket and startled doodling on my napkin.

"No… Just a friend. I've been a jerk lately and haven't been around. She'll get over it soon… I hope."

We sat in silence as I doodled. Namine brought us our waters and took our order. 10 minutes later we got our food.

It was silent for a few moments. I stole a glimpse up at him.

I was surprised to find Axel already watching me. He grinned.

I went back to scribbling on the menu as I waited for him to say something. Finally my name broke the silence.

"Roxas."

I looked up and was taken by surprise as he leaned across the table, raised his hand to my face and brushed his thumb under my bruised eye. I pulled away too late.

"Don't…"

I tried to think of something to talk about, but not nearly as hard as I tried to appear unmoved by his touch.

"Sorry."

He smiled at me apologetically.

My heart did an unexpected flip, startled by his bizarrely attractive smile. To my horror, I was so taken aback, I dropped my pen. It bounced on the tabletop a few times before rolling over the edge. Axel bent to pick it up. He held it out it the palm of his hand, and I had to focus not to touch his skin as I took it back.

"Is your eye okay?"

I blinked a few times until I recovered from the effect his smile had on me.

"I'm fine…"

I pushed around with my fork. I wasn't hungry anymore.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I shook my head and he nodded.

For some reason something he had said when we first met made its way into my thoughts.

"…You told me I might regret running away… What did you mean…?"

His eyes clouded over when I asked that. I'm surprised I even noticed it. It made me realize that I knew his face more than I should after only meeting him yesterday.

"I didn't like being told what to do so I ran away from home when I was 16…"

I nodded my head thoughtfully.

"Did you ever go back?"

I wasn't really curious but I felt like I should ask.

"I never got a chance to... My parents were murdered during a break in."

_Shit…_

Now I felt like an asshole. No, I was an asshole.

"I'm sorry…"

He waved it off and smiled but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Don't worry about it."

We finished eating in silence and didn't say anything else until we got to his apartment.

"Umm bathroom's through there. I'll put some pillows and blankets on the couch for you."

I started to head towards the bathroom but I hesitated and turned back to him.

"Look, I know I've been a jerk and I don't deserve how nice you're being but I really do appreciate this…"

He smirked and for the first time it didn't piss me off.

"I know kid."

I scowled when he called me kid and he laughed. I started to tell him off but my phone rang. It was Sora.

"Hey Sora."

Axel disappeared down the hallway. Probably to get the pillow and blanket he promised but I think he was also giving me some privacy.

"So? Do you need rescuing?"

Since I had left their apartment I had been waiting for this call. I already had it all planned out. Sora would call, I would make up some excuse for me to leave and I would never see Axel again.

But I found myself telling Sora that I was fine and that I would call him tomorrow.

I hung up as Axel came back into the living room.

"Who was that? Or can I not ask that?"

I rolled my eyes and took the blanket from him.

"It was my friend Sora. He wanted to know if I wanted to leave."

I might have been imagining it, but I think his face fell a little.

"Do you?"

I shook my head and sat on the couch. I noted that it was a lot more comfortable then Sora and Riku's.

"I'm still here aren't I?"

Surprise flitted across his face before he grinned and nodded.

"Night Roxas."

I didn't say anything back to him. He turned the light off and disappeared down the hallway. I didn't think I would get much sleep but as soon as my head hit the pillow I was fast asleep.

* * *

><p><strong>Hello? Is anyone reading this? I hate to sound desperate and beg but could I please get some more reviews people? I need to know how you are receiving this. Am I doing it okay? Is there stuff you don't like? Does it completely suck? Should I hang my head in shame for attempting to write? Please let me know what you think.<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

**Lol so Bethany's older brother, his wife and their 7 year old son Matt got here this morning. While we were looking through our old pokemon cards Matt came downstairs and asked us what we were doing. When we told him he was like 'what's pokemon?' We were like 'OMG! You poor deprived soul!'**

**Lol so we've spent most of today teaching him the awesomeness of pokemon XD He's obsessed now. **


	7. Ball Game

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**EAK! I love this chapter! Mainly because ChibiSeme97 beta'd for me! He's so freakin awesome! XDD I've always been iffy about someone betaing my stuff but he totally won me over! XDD I loved this chapter before he put his awesomeness into it but now I absolutely adore it! XDD I look forward to working with him on this story! XDD**

**AkuRoku~~**

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><p>Sunlight was streaming in through the blinds and hit my face. I have to say, it's not a way I like to be woken up. I groaned and pulled the pillow over my head as I rolled over to face the back of the couch. Enjoying the dark, I waited for sleep to overcome me again.<p>

Unfortunately, that's when I registered my thirst. I tried my best to ignore it but my throat was so parched it felt like I'd been swallowing cotton balls all night.

I laid there for another 5 minutes before giving in and pushing myself into a sitting position on the couch.

I stretched on the soft, but firm couch, and heard my back crack in the process. I groaned again and rubbed my eyes. Then slowly I got up and headed towards the kitchen. I let out a long yawn as I went, and good thing Axel wasn't here right now or he would cracking some sort of joke.

I was used to waking up at either my house or Sora and Riku's, so I automatically opened the fridge to pull out a bottle of water.

I balked. Nothing. Absolutely freaking nothing.

_Great…_

I didn't think he would mind if I went through his cabinets, but I still felt weird about it. Thankfully, the first one I opened had plastic cups in it.

I grabbed one and held it under the faucet as I turned it on.

I scrunched my face up in slight disgust at the metallic taste of the water. I couldn't remember the last time I drank water from a tap; and if staying at Axel's was going to become a regular thing he would have to invest in bottled water. ASAP.

Reluctantly, I took another sip of water before dumping it down the sink and placing my cup on the marble counter.

I rounded the corner of the kitchen to return to the couch, only to bump into Axel. He had his hands stuffed into his pockets and he grinned at me as he leaned against the wall.

"Morning Roxas. Sleep alright?"

I decided to try to be civil and offered him a slight smile. He seemed surprised but he didn't say anything about it.

"Yea, thanks Axel."

He's gonna make me murder him one day if he keeps smiling at me like that.

"No problem Roxas."

His eyes snapped to my hair and he reached out to me. I looked at him with calculating eyes but stayed still.

"There's something in your hair…" He mumbled.

I shivered at the feel of his fingers in my hair and I turned my face away just in time so that he wouldn't be able to see the blush on my face.

He still knew though.

"Do I make you uneasy Roxas?"

His mouth held a neutral line, but I detected a speculative smile trapped behind it.

Yes, actually, he had that affect on me. He also had the tendency to wipe all logical thought from my mind. I don't know why, but ugh, it's so frustrating.

"Sorry… What were we talking about?"

I said at a failed attempt to change the subject.

He smiled knowingly and walked away without answering.

I couldn't help but blush even more.

Axel walked back out of the kitchen with a cup of water in his hand and I rolled my eyes. He gave me a questioning look but I didn't elaborate.

"Hey Roxas… You aren't planning on going back home anytime soon are you?"

I shook my head.

"Nope…"

_But I know I should…The longer I wait... the worse everything will be. No..._

_It doesn't matter when I go back home… I'm still gonna get the shit beat out of me…_

"Why?"

I thought he had been asking out of concern and was going to try to convince me not to. So the smile on his lips took me by complete surprise.

"Up for a little game?"

I didn't like the mischievous look he had on his face.

"Game…?"

He nodded and his grin got even wider.

"Yep. Every weekend me and my friends get together to play some baseball. You're going to come with."

Me? Playing baseball? Oh no, no, no, no.

_Not going to happen!_

"Umm… well...Oh! I just remembered that I had something to do. Maybe some other time…"

_Yea… when hell freezes over…_

He smirked and I knew my fate was sealed.

"Oh you're coming Roxas. And you will play."

_Fuck…_

_Why can't I be a bird and just fly away? Oh yeah that's right because humans are fucking retarded, that's why._

Axel smirked.

_Damn it, I'm really going to kill him._

* * *

><p>"Do I really have to do this?"<p>

I looked at the equipment and people in the field with doubt. Axel chuckled and nodded as he clapped me on the shoulder.

"Yepp. Consider it payment for letting you stay at my place."

I looked at him doubtfully.

"Have I mentioned that I suck? Cause I suck! It's pathetic how much I suck!"

He chuckled.

"You any good at it?"

He asked.

I shook my head 'no', and blushed at the innuendo and turned away from him.

I reluctantly followed him as he approached his friends. After divvying up the teams, Axel led ours to our 'dugout' and determined the batting order. Handing me a bat, he pushed a helmet onto my head.

"You're up first, Roxas. All we need is a simple base hit."

I took a practice swing and almost whacked Axel in the face with it.

"No... I feel like getting a home run. I'm in a competitive mood."

He chuckled as he directed me towards home plate.

"We'll take one of those too. Step into the pitch and swing all the way through."

I placed the bat on my shoulder, thinking maybe I should have paid more attention during the World Series. Okay, maybe I should have _watched _the World Series when my friends invited me over. My helmet kept falling into my eyes, since it was way to big for someone like me. I looked out into the infield and quickly concluded that there is now way that I can hit a home run.

The blonde girl, I think her name's Larxene, took her place on the pitcher's mound. She flicked me off before getting into her stance.

_Huh? Wonder what that's about…_

She flashed a toxic smile and shot the baseball at me.

I barely hit it and it weakly rolled to the foul line. I blushed and I heard they guy behind me say:

"Strike…"

I looked over at the pink haired guy who was acting as the umpire. He sounded beyond bored. Looked it too.

Axel called from behind me.

"That wasn't a clean throw! Stop being a dipshit Larxene, and throw it normally."

I blinked, and then cracked a smile at Axel's comment.

Again the ball left Larxene's hand. I wasn't even paying attention, but I did swing. It was a pure miss.

"Strike two!"

I glared at the guy behind the catchers mask. I vaguely recalled his name being Demyx.

I stepped away from home base and swung the bat angrily at nothing. Axel Came up behind me with a chuckle. He grabbed my hands and repositioned my body.

"Here hold the bat like this. And when you see the ball close enough just pivot with your hips and swing. Got it memorized?"

He whispered into my ear and the hairs on my neck stood up.

"Let me show you… Pivot your hips like this. Don't be so robotic about it... Yeah just like that."

I could feel my face heat up with every one of his friends watching. He gave a me a bright smile.

"I think I've got it. Thanks."

Larxene was glaring at us and grinding her teeth. Jealous much.

"Get a room, fairies!"

I blushed some more and stepped away from Axel.

"Hey, I'm not a faerie! And try throwing something that isn't as half- assed as you, and I bet you any amount of money he'll hit it!"

Larxene and Axel glared at each other.

"Bitch, you're going to regret saying that!"

Axel rolled his eyes at the name and cockily boasted, "Well my Roxas can do anything. So shut the fuck up, whore!"

Wait...what...?

_HIS ROXAS?_

I blushed and looked at Larxene.

Larxene's eyes went wide and mad, and for a moment I thought she was a bull.

Axel dropped his voice, speaking to me alone.

"The moment you lose eye contact with the ball, you will miss. Don't let her get to you. When she's like this her pitches will be wilder than before, so just pay attention. I know you can do it!"

Axel walked back to the dugout and was cheering loudly for me.

Larxene threw the ball again and just as I was about to swing, I heard my name being bellowed from the parking lot nearby.

My bat clattered to the ground as I froze up in fear.

_Dad…_

I turned towards where his voice had come from. He was marching towards me with a look full of pure hatred etched onto his face.

Axel saw the look of fear on my face and started to move towards me but Dad got to me first.

I started walking backwards away from him, but he grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and lifted me off of the ground as he emitted a feral snarl in my face.

"Where the hell have you been boy! Huh? Tell me! I've been worried sick and here I find you _playing _like you've done nothing wrong! Explain yourself! Now!"

I had never seen him so angry and it was even worse because Axel was there. I didn't care about anyone else seeing me like this but I just couldn't take the pity and judgment in Axel's eyes.

_This is it… Yesterday I never wanted to see Axel again… Looks like I'm going to get what I wished for…_

I averted my eyes from my fathers' as my tears started to fall.

"Stop you're crying boy! I haven't hurt you! Yet! Now where have you been! Who are these people?"

I flailed around, trying to get him to loosen his hold on me so I could speak but it was to no avail.

"F-Friends… b-been wi..h frien..ds…"

I barely managed to gasp it out. I shouldn't have even tried. No excuse I gave him would be good enough.

"You… were… with… friends! So now your friends are more important than coming home!" He bellowed.

He threw me to the ground and aimed a kick at my stomach. I threw my head back and cried out in pain.

My father had the same sick look of accomplishment on his face, like every other time...

Axel had been rooted to the spot until my father drew his foot back to kick me again. He lunged between me and my father and stood over me in a protective manner.

My father's eyes widened in shock. I don't think anyone has ever stood up to him and I was sure he didn't know how to handle it.

"Who the hell are you?"

I couldn't see Axel's face and I was glad. I didn't want to see what could make my father's eyes fill with doubt. I didn't want to be afraid of Axel.

"I'm a friend of Roxas'. Leave. Now."

I stared at Axel's back with wide eyes. I had never heard his voice have such an edge to it. It had me quaking in fear. It was above and beyond the tone my father had been using with me for all these years.

I was so focused on Axel that I barely noticed my Dad drawing his arm back to throw a punch at Axel.

"Dad! No! Stop!"

The fear I felt for Axel was indescribable. If I wasn't hunched over in pain and barely able to move I would've thrown myself between them. I would've gladly taken another punch to the face so long as Axel didn't get hurt.

Dad didn't listen. He didn't need to. He never listened to anyone but himself.

I saw my father's fist fly toward Axel's face...

Axel grabbed his fist and twisted his arm around. I flinched at the crack that filled the air.

"Leave. Now."

My dad hissed in pain and backed away from Axel.

"You'll pay for this! Roxas! Let's go!"

I hesitated. Every instinct in my body told me to listen to my father but I didn't _want _to listen to him.

I just stared up at him from the ground. Not saying anything. I didn't know what to do...

"Roxas isn't going anywhere with you."

Dad looked between me and Axel. I nodded sheepishly in agreement as I looked away from my father's steel gaze.

My dad snorted before turning around and heading back to his car.

Axel towered above me and watched as my father drove away.

Then Axel turned to face me and knelt down beside me. I expected a fierce expression to match his deadly tone from a few moments ago, but a sincere gentleness in his eyes took me by surprise.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded numbly and winced as I sat up.

"I'm used to it… This is nothing…"

His face set into a small scowl when I said that, but he didn't say anything about it.

"Can you walk?"

I wasn't sure. I tried to stand up but I stumbled and fell onto my hands and knees.

"Here."

I looked at Axel's extended hand dumbly. I was so used to denying people's help but I found myself reaching for his hand without thinking.

"Thanks…"

He steadied me on my feet and slipped his arm around my waist.

"Axel?"

One of his friends called his name and looked back at them.

"I'll call you guys later. Sorry about the game."

_I shouldn't have come…_

"I'm sorry…"

He smiled down at me sympathetically.

"There's nothing to be sorry for Roxas."

I shook my head.

"I ruined your game."

He chuckled and I questioned his sanity.

"I'm pretty sure you ruined the game with your terrible batting skills Roxie."

I glared at him.

"You're the one that made me play! And for the last time my name's Roxas!"

I turned my face away from him when all he did was smile.

I scowled a little bit, but I wasn't serious and found myself with a small smile seconds later.

"That's more like it. I don't like seeing you sad Roxas. I prefer your usual attitude where you _act _like you hate me."

I rolled my eyes.

"It's not acting…"

I didn't sound convincing at all and he continued to tease me about it as we hobbled back to his place.

All he did was ramble about simple things, and I couldn't hold back my smile.

* * *

><p><strong>Hah! Axel totally showed Roxas' Dad that touching Roxas will not be tolerated! XDD And go Axel for calling Roxas his! XDD Credit goes to ChibiSeme97 for that part I never even thought of it but I totally love it! XDD<strong>

**Reviews please :O)**

"**I'm not perfect; but I keep trying cause that's what I said I would do from the start. I'm not alive when I'm lonely, so please don't leave. Was it something I said? Or just my personality…?"**

**This describes how I'm feeling perfectly. I feel like I can't live up to people's expectations but I keep trying and the harder I try, the harder I fall…**

**I'm gonna go crawl into a corner now…**


	8. Scars

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**Just wanna give another shout out to ChibiSeme97! XD You're awesome! Thanks so much betaing for me! XD**

**Haha Roxas gets drunk in this one! XD**

* * *

><p>I felt Axel's eyes on me for the millionth time since we got back to his apartment. I understood that he was worried, especially after witnessing what I went through first hand, but there was a limit.<p>

"Axel! I'm fine!"

I turned around and glared at him but he didn't seem to care that I had caught him staring.

"If you don't stop staring at me like that I'm going to spontaneously combust!"

He rolled his eyes and chuckled and I turned around with a scoff.

_Glad to know I fuckin amuse you! Asshole!_

"You're acting like you hate me again Roxas. I wouldn't pursue a career in acting, if I were you. You suck at it."

I threw a glare his way.

_You think I'm acting, but ohh, you just irk me Axel. Maybe I can get back at him later..._

I didn't notice I was just staring into space, smirking, until Axel snapped his fingers in front of my face.

I quickly returned to reality and blushed.

"I'm not acting!"

I stormed down the hallway and slammed the bathroom door behind me.

_Stupid, arrogant, self absorbed, over confident, red headed asshole!_

If I had a nickel for every time he looked at me with that smug smile of his, I'd be rich in no time!

I winced as a pain shot up my side and I leaned against the bathroom counter for support.

I should've stayed on the couch and ignored Axel, but the guy just got under my skin! And now my side was

starting to throb again because I had exerted myself getting away from him!

I knew it was wrong to place the blame on Axel, but I wasn't going to admit I was the reason my side started

hurting again.

Another spasm of pain ran up my side and I pulled my shirt off to inspect the damage.

A bruise the size and shape of my Dad's foot was plastered across my side. I gingerly poked at it and squeezed

my eyes shut at the slight pain it caused. It would be a while before it went away.

_At least it'll be easy to hide._

I took on my other scars and wounds my father had inflicted over the years as I looked myself in the mirror.

I had a cigarette burn scarred on the right side of my chest after my father had found a pack of cigarettes in my

back pack last year. He held me down and held a lit cigarette to my flesh... I still remembered the smell of my

skin as it was being burned…

I turned around to look at the tiny scars that were littered across my back that I got from being thrown onto the

shards of glass on the living room floor. Let's just say I never played baseball since... well ever since today...

I traced my recent scar along the tip of my index finger as the bathroom door opened. Axel poked his head inside.

"Hey, are you okay? I was ju—"

He broke off mid sentence when he saw the bruise on my side. And probably all of my other scars too.

I turned away in shame.

"Don't look…"

I could feel his eyes roaming over me and a shiver traveled down my spine.

"Jesus Roxas… I didn't realize it was this bad…"

_That's my dad for you… He's nothing if not thorough…_

"It's not as bad as it looks…"

I pulled my shirt back on and stepped past him out of the bathroom without so much as a glance.

I knew I had gone back to being my usually jerk self, but I hated that Axel knew how vulnerable I really was.

I wanted him to know that I wasn't as weak as I seemed.

I strolled over to the couch and collapsed onto it, pulling the pillow Axel gave me, onto my lap and hugging it to

my chest.

Axel followed me and leaned over the back of the couch, piercing me with a calculating stare.

He opened his mouth but I cut him off before he could say anything.

"Look, whatever you have to say, don't. Whatever you're thinking, stop. And whatever pity you're feeling for me, forget all about it."

His mouth shut with a click. He opened his mouth again but didn't say anything. Then he sighed and pushed

away from the couch.

"Want something to drink?"

I nodded and started to say water but then I remembered it would come from the tap. And to be honest I

wanted something stronger than water.

"Yeah… a beer…"

I hated that my dad drank but every once in a while I indulged myself and attempted to drink my problems

away. It always ended up with me having a massive hang over though…

"A beer?"

I sat up and nodded at him over the back of the couch. He had a doubtful look on his face as he pulled a bottle

out of the fridge.

"How old are you anyways?"

I rolled my eyes and scoffed. I hated how short I was. People always thought I was younger than I really was.

"17. I'll be 18, April 25th."

"Really? You're just so short!"

I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms.

"Well, how old are you then?"

He gave me a smug smile as he walked over to me.

"21."

That took me by surprise.

"Oh…"

_I guess I really am just a kid to him then…_

"Why don't you just move out and get away from your dad? You're old enough. Well almost."

I glared at him for doing exactly what I had told him not to do. He was voicing his thoughts. He was judging me. But I still wasn't mad at him. Instead, I wanted to make him understand.

"…I can't. He needs me Axel…"

I took a beer from him and popped the cap off. He gave me a cynical look as I drank.

"Roxas… The man doesn't give a shit about you…"

I took another, longer, drink when he said that and shook my head. I was regretting allowing the conversation to start. I already knew that no one could possibly understand. Especially someone like, Axel.

"… My mother killed herself… Taking care of me, my dad, and working all at once was too much for her and she killed herself. My dad blames me but I'm the only thing he has left of her… So he loves me in his own way…"  
>It was the best way I could explain the tie I still felt I had with my father despite the way he treated me.<p>

_He's my dad… He has to love me… Right…?_

"Roxas! Look at yourself! He's the one that did this to you! That's not love!"

He pointed at my black eye and grabbed my arm gently as he indicated the scar on my hand before scooting closer and pushing my shirt up to expose my bruise.

The anger I felt towards him overrode the pleasure I felt when his fingertips brushed my bare skin.

I shivered slightly and shook my head.

"He's the only family I have left Axel! You wouldn't understand!"

I pushed myself away from him and buried myself into the corner of the couch.

"…You're right. My parents are dead… How could I _possibly_understand how you feel!"

I could hear the heavy, angry sarcasm in his voice.

I flinched away from the expression on his face. I had never seen him look like that and it terrified me.

I started to apologize but he cut me off.

"Fuck off Roxas…"

He walked over to the front door and looked back me with disdain before wrenching the door open and slamming it behind him.

I stared blankly at the door and waited for him to come back. I could've, should've, gone after him but I didn't. I

I just turned the TV on and drank my beer.

* * *

><p><em>Fuckin kid! Who the hell does he think he is! <em>

I had been ready to throttle Roxas for telling me I couldn't understand how he felt. But the last thing I wanted to do was hurt him so I forced myself to get out of there.

_Just walk around for a few hours… Clear you head… Calm down… then go back and talk to him__…_

Yeah that's what I'll do... I'll talk to him about it...

The last thing I wanted to do was push him away. And I knew that could easily happen if we didn't talk cause the kid was a runner. I didn't know much about him but I knew Roxas was the type of person who ran away when things started to look bad.

_And after telling him to fuck off I'm sure he's ready to bolt any minute…_

Sure I'd chase after him, but... I'd rather he not run from me at all.

He doesn't deserve to have to live with someone so aggressive. Through his mask of fake bravery, he's someone who needs help getting away from it all.

_And I want to be the person to help him__…_

* * *

><p>I strolled back into my apartment at half past 7. I half expected to come back and find that Roxas had left but there he was. Passed out on my couch with the TV still on... Well he seemed to be passed out at least.<p>

"Hey Assel…"

I was surprised. He didn't sound pissed, but that could easily be the alcohol talking.

"Hey Roxas…? Are you okay?"

He snickered and looked at me through drowsy eyes.

"Heehee… Why's the rum always gone?"

His cheeks were flushed, and his eyes were glassy. He was trying to sit up, but failed completely and collapsed back onto the couch.

I rolled my eyes as and chuckled at his behavior.

"Note to self: My little Roxie cannot hold his liquor… How much beer did you have?"

I looked at all the beer bottles that covered the floor next to the couch, and the coffee table and groaned mentally.

"S'not beer! I prefer rum! Rum's good... Why's the rum gone Assel…?"

_They just had to have a Pirates marathon tonight of all nights didn't they…?_

"Come on Jack Sparrow… Let's get you to bed…"

I turned the TV off and hoisted him off of the couch.

"I'm Captain Shack Shparrow, savvy?"

_If I hear one more line from that damn movie…_

I put my arm around his waist and half walked, half carried him to my bedroom.

He was going to have a massive headache in the morning so I figured I'd let him sleep on my bed. It would be a lot more comfortable for him and sleeping on the couch for one night wouldn't kill me.

As we stumbled to my bedroom, I had difficulty opening the door, because Roxas was putting all his weight on me, and refused to keep his feet up.

When I finally got the door open, I continued to drag/carry him to the bed. When we were about a foot away from the bed, Roxas tried getting onto the bed, but collapsed.

I caught him as he fell forward, but it resulted in us in the bed, with my arm stuck under his body. When I tried to remove him from on top of me, he made a whining noise and I looked at him.

He had eyes almost completely closed, and he looked like a dog that was just kicked.

"Assel... stay..."

Then he closed his eyes, and fell into what looked like a peaceful sleep.

I shook my head and moved our bodies, so that we were both laying comfortably in the bed.

_Roxas… you're going to be the death of me…_

In his sleep, Roxas turned towards me and grabbed on to my shirt.

_This kid really doesn't deserve what his father put's him through...It's bullshit…_

He snuggled closer to me and let out a content sigh.

_Definitely going to be the death of me… He's just too damn cute!_

All I could do was hold the boy as he slept. And soon enough, I joined him in a peaceful slumber.

* * *

><p><strong>D'awww! The endings so cute! I love it. And I just had to put in the Pirates of the Caribbean part. I was watching a marathon of the mives a few days ago and the idea popped in my head.<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

**Hope everyone has a good New Year's Eve! I know I'm going to ;D**


	9. Headaches

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**AkuRoku~~**

* * *

><p>My phone started ringing in my pocket and jolted me awake. I groaned and buried my head deeper into the pillow trying to drown out the annoying noise. But it just continued to ring and ring.<p>

The call went to voice mail but it started ringing again right away. I went to drag my pillow over my head but _something _was on my arm and was preventing me from moving it.

I snapped my eyes open and realized that that _something _was Roxas. Waking up to him surprised the hell out of me but once the haze of sleep left me I recalled how we ended up like this.

My phone ringing broke through my initial shock of waking up to Roxas. I stuffed my hand into my pants pocket and wiggled out my cell.

"What!"

I yelled quietly into the phone. I was pissed about being woken up but I didn't want to wake up the blonde sleeping beside me.

Someone was breathing angrily on the other end.

"What! You're asking me what! You're _late_ Axel! You were supposed to be here 20 minutes ago! But you're not here! And I bet its cause of that blonde _brat _that has you wrapped around his little finger!"

Having Larxene screech into your ear makes it really hard to decipher what she's saying, but unfortunately I've had years of practice.

I looked over at the clock on my bedside table until the red numbers swam into focus. It was 9:20.

I knew I had promised Larxene I'd meet her at 9 today but I couldn't remember where, or even what we were going to do.

I held my phone between my ear and shoulder so that I could use my free hand to rub the sleep from my eyes.

"Calm the fuck down Larxene! Damn! I'm not gonna be able to make it today. And he's not a brat! What the hell's your problem!"

My voice started to rise but I lowered it when Roxas squirmed a little bit.

I heard a sound that was somewhere between a growl and a hiss come from the other end of the phone.

"Ever since you met that fuckin kid, he's all you can talk or think about it! I mean you brought him to the baseball game yesterday Axel! That's our thing! What do you mean you can't make it! It's my fuckin birthday Axel! My birthday! You promised to spend it with me…"

I pulled my phone away from my ear. She was screeching so loudly I was afraid my ears would start bleeding. I groaned, but then her voice took on a whiny, pathetic tone when she said I promised to spend today with her with her.

_Shit! I can't believe I forgot her birthday…_

"Larx… I'm sorry. Forgive me? Please?"

I heard her sniffle a little bit and scoff but I knew she was calming down. Finally, she sighed and answered me.

"…Will I not see you at all today…?"

I knew that we usually spent her birthday together, but I didn't realize that it meant so much to her.

"I just woke up Larx…"

I heard a slight whimper come from her end and I groaned in defeat.

"But I'll be there as soon as I can. Okay? I'll call you when I'm on my way. Don't blow up my phone. If you do, I won't show up."

I heard her squeal in delight before she hung up the phone.

I dropped my head back to the pillow. I had a headache and was ready to go back to sleep but I couldn't now.

Roxas squirmed some more in his sleep and scooted closer to me. As he moved, a strand of his hair fell across his face and I reached out to tuck it back behind his ear.

My thumb grazed his cheek and I marveled at how soft his skin was. I proceeded to run it up and down his cheek before running my thumb very lightly under his bruised eye. The color was starting to fade and

I guessed it would disappear completely by the end of the week.

He grumbled in his sleep and squeezed his eyes shut before they snapped open.

I pulled my hand away from his face and smiled at him.

"Hey."

* * *

><p>The ruffling of my hair and a slight pressure on my face woke me up. I wasn't ready to wake up though, so I kept my eyes shut and tried to fall back asleep.<p>

But the pressure on my cheek wouldn't go away and I was laying on something that wasn't comfortable at all.

I also had a massive headache.

_I think I drank just a little too much last night…_

I mumbled something under my breath about not being able to fall back asleep and squeezed my eyes shut before opening them… and I was...staring at Axel?

_What the hell…?_

I noted that the pressure I had felt on my face was his fingers. He smiled at me as he pulled his hand away.

"Hey. Finally awake Captain?"

_Captain…?_

He chuckled. For some reason he thought that was funny…

I continued to stare at him. I didn't even blink.

_Why the hell am I in bed with Axel…? I wasn't that drunk was I…?_

I ruled out that possibility when I realized we were both fully clothed. I also realized I was clinging to his shirt and I dropped my hand from his shirt as if it had electrocuted me.

I pushed myself away from and sat up. The sudden change of gravity made me feel nauseous and I placed my head between my knees until it passed.

"Are you alright?"

Axel sat up too and placed his hand on the small of my back. A tingle ran up my spine and I tensed up at his touch.

I shrugged his hand off and pushed myself off of the bed.

"I'm fine… Umm why were we… I mean… what exactly happened…?"

I scrunched my face up in the effort of trying to remember but it was all a blur. The last thing I remembered was Axel telling me to fuck off.

_Oh no! Is he still made at me! He doesn't seem to be…_

I could feel the panic etched on my face as I turned to face him.

"Axel, I am so sorry!"

He raised an eyebrow at my apology.

"What for?"

_What for…?_

"For saying that you couldn't understand…"

He pondered that for a few seconds before a chuckle escaped his lips.

"Oh that? I'm not mad anymore."

I literally collapsed to the floor when he said.

_He's acting like it was no big deal… The fact that I was freaking out obviously means nothing to him…_

"I fucking hate you… you know that, right…?"

He chuckled some more. If I could reach him I would have punched him in the face.

"You were just too cute last night Roxie. I couldn't possibly stay mad at you."

_Hmph… Wait! Cute!_

"I am NOT cute! And my name's ROXAS!"

Then something clicked in my head and I cut Axel off before he could say something else that would piss me off.

"Why'd you call me captain earlier?"

He smirked and I narrowed my eyes at him.

"When you were drunk off your ass last night you kept quoting lines from Pirates of the Caribbean. You called yourself Captain Jack Sparrow. There was a marathon on or something. It was really annoying, but funny."

I blushed furiously when he told me that.

_So embarrassing!_

"…Asshole!"

I stormed out of his bedroom and down the hallway into the living room and collapsed onto the couch.

_Never stepping foot in that room again! Never! Never drinking again either! FORGET IT!_

"Come on, don't be mad. I was just teasing. It was cute Roxie."

_Shut up! I'm mad at you and refuse to talk to you! Just sto—_

"I AM NOT CUTE! AND FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME MY NAME IS ROXAS! R-O-X-A-S!"

_So much for not talking to him…_

He chuckled and ruffled my hair. It irritated me cause it made me feel like a little kid. I ignored the other

part of me that enjoyed it.

"I know Roxas, I just like to tease you. You make it too easy."

I rolled my eyes and mentally cursed him.

"Whatever…"

He flashed me _his_ smile, which resulted in me blushing, before he walked over to the door and grabbed his jacket out of the closet

All irritation forgotten, I sat up and looked at him curiously.

"Where are you going?"

He pulled his jacket on and grabbed the keys to the car he had borrowed.

"It's Larxene's birthday and I promised to spend it with her."

_Larxene…?_

"Oh… So, like a date?"

I tried to make it sound like I was asking out of casual curiosity but I'm not sure if I pulled it off.

"Yea, you could call it that."

_He has a girlfriend… WAIT! Why am I disappointed! It doesn't matter to me one way or another!_

"Oh, okay. Have fun."

I tried my best at a fake smile, but I knew It looked odd.

_But that sounded indifferent... right?_

"See you later Roxas."

He walked out the door, leaving me alone in his small, cold apartment.

I tried to act like it didn't bother me, but it did. A lot.

_Stupid… Somewhere along the line you got your hopes up didn't you…?_

_NO! I don't care about him at all!_

I grabbed my head with both hands and tried to work against the massive headache that was forming.

_This is all his fault…_

I grabbed the pillow off of the couch and threw it against the front the door.

"Axel, you idiot…!"

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry it's so short! DX<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**


	10. Denial

Cornered

**Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me in any way.**

**I really like this chapter and I hope you guys do too. :D**

**AkuRoku~~**

* * *

><p>The pillow hit the floor and I continued to stare at the door. Glaring was more like it. Scorch marks just might appear if I stare at it long enough.<strong><br>**

Suddenly, Larxene's behavior at the baseball game yesterday made perfect sense.**  
><strong>

_Stupid Axel… Stupid Larxene… Stupid… me…_**  
><strong>

My headache became a pounding mess and I tried rubbing my head again but it only made it worse.**  
><strong>

_I've had enough of this…_**  
><strong>

I shoved my shoes onto my feet and shrugged on my jacket before running out of Axel's apartment.**  
><strong>

For some reason, Axel going out with Larxene really bothered me. It bothered me _a lot_. But I was not going to sit around his apartment, moping, and waiting for him to come back to me like some love sick teenage girl, dammit!**  
><strong>

_No! You don't love him! Hell, you don't even like him! He's a jerk and an asshole… and he completely saved your ass yesterday and gave you a place to stay… NO! NO SHAME ON YOU FOR THINKING THAT! Ugh...stupid...STUPID!_**  
><strong>

I was going to ignore whatever _feelings _I _thought _I was _feeling _towards Axel. Even if I was interested in him, which I'm not, he just feels sorry for me. He helped me out of pity. He doesn't feel anything for me… There may be little things he says or does that suggests otherwise but it was all a joke to him.**  
><strong>

He said so himself. He enjoys teasing me, he told me himself! I make it 'too _easy', _he said_. _**  
><strong>

I stopped dead in my tracks, not caring that people behind me were grumbling about having to go around me.**  
><strong>

_He must've realized that I was feeling… something…_**  
><strong>

I leaned on the wall of the building I was next to and slid my back down it. I then hung my head to my chest where I could at least try to think about what the hell I was thinking of nowadays.

_God, how pathetic am I…? _**  
><strong>

"Roxas?"**  
><strong>

My ears perked up when I heard the familiar voice and I looked up at a girl with shoulder length auburn hair and blue eyes that were filled with worry, curiosity, and a tint of wariness.**  
><strong>

"Hey Kairi."**  
><strong>

The corners of my lips twitched in an attempt to smile at her but I couldn't. I was too… I don't even know.**  
><strong>

Hesitantly, she smiled back and crouched down in front me.**  
><strong>

"What's up?"**  
><strong>

And on top of feeling shitty and pathetic, I now feel guilty. I had been an ass to Kairi, but she was acting like I had done nothing wrong. But here she is, worrying about me, and smiling like she always does.**  
><strong>

I shook my head and leaned forward so my head was resting on her shoulder.**  
><strong>

"Everything's fucked up Kairi…"**  
><strong>

I rarely let people see me like this, but I really didn't care if I was seen as vulnerable at the moment.**  
><strong>

She patted my shoulder before wrapping me in a hug.**  
><strong>

"Sora told me you haven't gone home in a few days. What did you and your dad argue about this time?"**  
><strong>

I was shocked when she asked about Dad. He was the furthest thing from my mind then. **  
><strong>

"Huh? No. That's not what I'm talking about Kairi… I'm talking about Axel…"**  
><strong>

She pushed me back to look at me and her face was scrunched up in confusion.**  
><strong>

"Who's Axel?"**  
><strong>

I realized Kairi had no idea what had been going on in my life the past few days. And I didn't feel like explaining and reliving it all over again.**  
><strong>

I shoved myself off of the ground and started walking away.**  
><strong>

"He's nobody."**  
><strong>

_Yea… Right… Nobody…_**  
><strong>

I heard her give an exasperated sigh before she started walking after me. She looped her arm with mine when she caught up to me.**  
><strong>

Without saying a word, we started heading for Riku and Sora's apartment.**  
><strong>

"_Nobody_ couldn't make you look so miserable. Who is he Roxas?"**  
><strong>

I tried to ignore her intense stare but it was impossible. **  
><strong>

"He's the asshole who's letting me stay with him…"**  
><strong>

I growled through clenched teeth. I sounded unintelligible but she got the gist of it.**  
><strong>

An amused smile touched her lips and I knew exactly what she was thinking.**  
><strong>

"That's very generous of him. So why's he an asshole?"**  
><strong>

I groaned. I was tired of everybody going on about how nice and generous he was.

_He is an asshole to the core and nothing was going to make me think otherwise!__**  
><strong>_

"He's an over confident bastard! And he's always teasing me! He gets under my skin Kairi! And he constantly calls me Roxie! You know how much I hate that!"**  
><strong>

I hated the whiny edge that my voice had taken. And I hated how Kairi's amused smile became even more pronounced.**  
><strong>

"Yes, and I also know that whenever someone dares to call you Roxie you all but kill them, but it sounds like he's still walking around and breathing. Seems to me like you like him."**  
><strong>

She bumped her hip against mine and winked at me.**  
><strong>

_NO! _ _There is no liking going on here! Nada! Zilch! Zero!_

"He's got a girlfriend Kairi, so even if I was interested, which I'm not, there's no chance of anything happening. So you can forget all about the sick fantasy that's forming in your head. I mean it."**  
><strong>

It was like I hadn't said anything at all.**  
><strong>

"How do you know he has a girlfriend?"**  
><strong>

_Too late…_

Her fantasy had already taken root in her brain.**  
><strong>

_Great…_**  
><strong>

"He's on a date with her right now. He told me so himself."**  
><strong>

_Come up with a rebuttal for that! I dare you!_

She giggled. I had no idea why. There was nothing funny about the situation.**  
><strong>

"You're too stubborn Roxas—"**  
><strong>

"I am NOT stubborn…"**  
><strong>

"—And I can tell you like him—"**  
><strong>

"DO NOT!"

"—Even though you refuse to admit it—"**  
><strong>

"There's nothing to admit!"

"—And I _think _that maybe you're misunderstanding the situation."**  
><strong>

"What part of 'he has a girlfriend' don't you understand Kairi!"**  
><strong>

She rolled her eyes and bumped my hip with hers again.**  
><strong>

"Girls just have a sixth sense about these things."**  
><strong>

I mumbled something under my breath and rolled my eyes.**  
><strong>

"Bitch…"**  
><strong>

She smiled and pecked me on the cheek.**  
><strong>

"Aww, I love you too Rox-ass."

Is it possible for your eyes to get stuck when you roll them? Cause I seem to be doing that a lot lately.

"Harhar. You're sooo clever Kairi."**  
><strong>

We reached Sora and Riku's apartment and started heading up the stairs.**  
><strong>

"So, do I even want to know how you got a black eye? It doesn't look bad, but I'm guessing it did a few days ago."**  
><strong>

_Crap…_**  
><strong>

Before I had a chance to come up with a lie, yelling started coming from inside the apartment.**  
><strong>

"Don't bullshit me Riku! Where is he! I'm gonna kill him!"**  
><strong>

_As if today couldn't get worse!_**  
><strong>

"Namine calm down! We don't know where he is!"**  
><strong>

A pissed off Namine and a pissed off Riku in the same room could easily be compared to the beginning of World War 3.**  
><strong>

Sora wasn't saying anything, but he was probably hiding out like any sane person would be.**  
><strong>

"Calm down! You want me to calm down! He doesn't talk to me for weeks, he shows up at the diner with some guy, who was hot as hell by the way, and says to me 'Hey Namine.' That's all he had to say! After disappearing for a month Riku! A month!"**  
><strong>

Her impersonation of me was dead on. It would have been funny if she wasn't so mad, but right now it was kinda freaky.

Kairi looked at me and waggled her eyebrows.**  
><strong>

"You forgot to mention he was hot Roxas."

_I didn't notice… Okay maybe I did but his hotness is irrelevant!_**  
><strong>

I glared at Kairi and mouthed at her.**  
><strong>

'_So not the time…'_**  
><strong>

We stepped into the apartment and the short blonde whose eyes were lit with fire rounded on me.**  
><strong>

"Hey Namine."**  
><strong>

She snorted and placed her hands on her hips.**  
><strong>

"Rox, you have five minutes to explain yourself before I fucking murder you!"**  
><strong>

I untangled my arm from Kairi's and collapsed onto the couch. I leaned my head back and squeezed

my eyes shut, trying to get over the incessant pounding in my head.**  
><strong>

"Kill me, please. At least my headache would go away. And I wouldn't have to deal with all this bullshit either."**  
><strong>

Namine's expression softened a little and she sat on the couch next to me.**  
><strong>

"I'm still mad as hell at you, but what's wrong hun?"**  
><strong>

Kairi sat down on the other side of me and Riku, followed by Sora who just emerged from the bedroom, leaned over the back of the couch.**  
><strong>

Knowing I would regret it later, opened my mouth and started to explain my inner turmoil.

* * *

><p>"So were you two on a date the other day?"<strong><br>**

I shook my head at Namine's question.**  
><strong>

"It's not like that…"

I sounded exasperated and for good reason. Somehow they managed to stay silent throughout my explanation but a relentless onslaught of questions started up as soon as I was finished.**  
><strong>

"But it scares you that you like him."**  
><strong>

I wasn't really paying attention to what Kairi said and I nodded.**  
><strong>

"Yes."**  
><strong>

Then I realized what I was saying and quickly corrected myself.**  
><strong>

"I mean no!"**  
><strong>

Sora looked confused.**  
><strong>

"So, you don't like him."**  
><strong>

I nodded.**  
><strong>

"No. I mean, yes, I don't like him! Ugh, stop trying to trick me into saying something I don't mean! He has a girlfriend!"**  
><strong>

I felt the blush that touched my cheeks and glared at them as they started laughing.**  
><strong>

**"I hate all of you. I hope you know that."**

_I so need new friends…_**  
><strong>

I crossed my arms in a pout and turned away from them.**  
><strong>

"Aww come on Roxas, don't be mad."**  
><strong>

I threw a glare at Sora but he wasn't perturbed by it.**  
><strong>

"Come on. We're going to the diner for lunch and you have no choice in the matter. You're coming."**  
><strong>

It weren't for the fact that I was starving, I probably would've argued. Sora smirked when my stomach growled. He knew he had won.**  
><strong>

Axel was still wearing on my mind, but I felt better than I had in a while as I walked to the diner with my friends. I was laughing and joking around with them. I wasn't even worrying about my dad. Namine didn't seem mad anymore so that was a big weight taken off of my shoulders.

I couldn't wait to get to the diner. I was starving and already thinking about what I was gonna get. I was actually looking forward to eating lunch with my friends. Until I saw familiar heads of blonde and red emerging out of a store across the street.**  
><strong>

I stopped walking and my friends stopped with me and looked at what I was staring at.**  
><strong>

Axel came out of the store laughing with Larxene following behind him. She was giggling and reached out for Axel's hand. He seemed surprised but he yanked on her hand and pulled her closer.**  
><strong>

She leaned into him and stood on her tiptoes and… I couldn't watch anymore. I wrenched my eyes away from the devastating scene.**  
><strong>

Namine's face was etched with concern. I realized she was the only one that knew what Axel looked like.**  
><strong>

She stepped towards me.**  
><strong>

"Roxas…"**  
><strong>

I smiled and laughed it off.**  
><strong>

"See? I told you guys he had a girlfriend, didn't I? There's you're proof… I-I gotta go…"**  
><strong>

They called after me and I started running. I went back to Axel's apartment, grabbed my bag and made sure to lock the door behind me as I left.**  
><strong>

It was hard to not look back...

* * *

><p><strong>Aww! Poor Roxas! :'( Everybody give him hugs!<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

**I'm starving! SO Gurgi's gonna go find herself some munchies n' crunchies! XD Haha let me know if you got that! XD**

**Hope you like the chapter! XD**


	11. Not Coming Back

Cornered 11

**Kingdom Hearts**** does not belong to me in any way.****  
><strong>

**AkuRoku~~**

* * *

><p><strong><strong>"One. You can pick out one thing as my gift to you, Larx. And please try to remember that I'm on a budget right now."**  
><strong>

She rolled her eyes and started searching through a rack of clothes.**  
><strong>

"I know Axel. You tell me the same thing every year. You know, it's a general rule that you're supposed to be nice to the birthday girl."**  
><strong>

She turned to face me and wrapped her arms around my waist.**  
><strong>

_And it starts…_**  
><strong>

I placed my hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her away.**  
><strong>"Cut it out Larx. You know I'm not interested."**  
><strong>

She batted her eyes and smiled. It was probably supposed to look attractive but all it did was gross me out.**  
><strong>

"I could make you interested."**  
><strong>

I ignored that comment and waited for her to pick something out. The sooner I was done here, the sooner I could go back home to Roxas.**  
><strong>

"Why aren't I good enough for you Axel? Is it because I'm not a short blonde boy with blue eyes?"**  
><strong>

I started to get angry but I quickly reined it in.**  
><strong>

_Just set her straight….Like you have a million times before… even so...It never changes anything…_**  
><strong>

I chuckled and tried to make my tone light so I wouldn't upset her.**  
><strong>"Well there's that, the fact that you're a girl, and the fact that I think of you as a sister. All very understandable reasons I think. But other than that you're great Larx. Just not for me."**  
><strong>

I offered her a smile and she smiled back, but I could still see the hurt in her eyes.**  
><strong>

"There's nothing here I want. Let's go somewhere else."**  
><strong>

I groaned on the inside but forced myself to laugh as we left the store.**  
><strong>

"You're too picky Larxene."**  
><strong>

She started laughing as well and it seemed like things were back to normal.**  
><strong>

"I am not picky! I just have good taste."**  
><strong>

Without any warning she took hold of my hand and pulled, making me stumble back to her a bit.**  
><strong>

"Larx, wha-"

"Axel, can't you give me a chance?"**  
><strong>

I was shocked speechless, but only for a few seconds.**  
><strong>

I went to tug my hand out of her grasp but she held on and I ended up pulling her to me.**  
><strong>

"Larx we've talked about this! I'm not interes—"**  
><strong>

She wasn't even listening to me. She leaned into me and pressed her lips against mine. **  
><strong>

I wasn't even thinking as I pushed her away from me. And I pushed her hard.**  
><strong>

She fell to the ground. The expression on her face would've been comical if I wasn't so pissed at her.**  
><strong>

"What the _hell _is wrong with you!"**  
><strong>

Something was definitely wrong. I was used to Larxene's advances, but she would always stop after I told her. Albeit, she would start right back up again a few weeks later, but she had never gone this far before.**  
><strong>

She glared up at me as she wiped at the corners of her eyes.**  
><strong>

"Fuck you Axel…"**  
><strong>

She pushed herself up off of the ground and ran off in the direction of her apartment.**  
><strong>

I shook my head and started heading in the opposite direction. I felt bad for treating Larxene that

way but she had had it coming.**  
><strong>

_There was nothing else I could do…_**  
><strong>

Okay, I probably could've handled it a little better but it's too late now. She'll come around in a few days. She always does.**  
><strong>

I took the stairs that led to my apartment two at a time and reached for the door knob. I was surprised to find out that the door was locked though.

I knew I hadn't locked the door when I left, so the only explanation I could think of was that Roxas had gone somewhere.**  
><strong>

I didn't think too much of it as I unlocked the door and stepped inside. I shrugged my jacket off and hung it up next to the door, before walking into the kitchen and grabbing a pop out of the ridge.

My head was still throbbing from this morning and I deiced to take some Tylenol and take a nap. Hopefully my headache would go away and it would pass the time until Roxas came back.

* * *

><p>My phone started ringing for the millionth time as I made my way home. I was so fed up with the incessant ringing that I finally gave in and answered the call.<p>

"What the fuck do you want!"

I hadn't bothered looking at the caller ID. I had just assumed it was one of my friends. Or worse. Axel.

"_What the hell did you sa—"_

I panicked when I heard my dad's voice and hung up without a second thought.

_Great… He's gonna kill me when I get home…_

My phone started ringing again and I made sure to check the caller ID before answering this time.

"What Sora?"

He took a sigh of relief before answering.

"You need to stop running away like this Roxas. It scares the shit out of us."

I tightened the grip I had on my phone and tried to keep my voice leveled as I answered.

"I'm sorry but Dad's probably flippin out and I thought that I should go home…"

We both knew I was lying and Sora wasn't going to let that slide.

"Bullshit. You're upset cause you saw Axel kissing that girl and now you're running away from him.

Everybody knows it so don't even try to lie to us."

_It's not like that… _

"I could care less about who he kisses…"

I didn't sound convincing at all.

"Are you or are you not upset?"

I shook my head and silently groaned.

"No. I was just…surprised is all. And the only reason I'm leaving his place is because I never should've been there in the first place! I was thinking about it way before I saw them together…I mean I can't stay at the guys' place forever..."

That's what I was going to tell myself and anybody else who asked at least.

"So what then? You're gonna go back home? Let your dad beat the crap out of you? Wallow in self pity when he's done? And then mope around the next day cause you can't see Axel? That sounds like a great way to live your life Roxas."

I stopped walking and sat down on a nearby bench.

"I'm not going back to Axel, Sora…I'm not gonna mope around all day… I'm gonna start going to school again…"

Sora scoffed.

"And do what? Not do your work and fail cause you were too busy moping?"

I rolled my eyes.

"I'm already failing so it's a moot point. If nothing else it'll pass the time…"

There really was no point in me going to school, though. My attendance and grades were dismal. I was already aware that I was either gonna have to repeat the year or drop out of high school altogether.

Neither of which I was ready to broach to my dad. He'd kill me.

"Alright. Fine. I know I can't make you go back to Axel's, though I think you should—"

"It's not happening Sora so drop it!"

"—But at least stay with us. It'll make me feel better."

I shook my head and pushed myself off of the bench.

"No. I'm not gonna burden you like that Sora. I'll be fine at home. Bye."

"Roxas! Wa—"

I hung up and started heading home.

* * *

><p>Dad went after me as soon as I stepped inside the house but I sidestepped him and ran to my room. Locking the door behind me.<p>

He pounded on my door and we started yelling back and forth. This was the closest I'd come to standing up to him and it terrified me, but it also felt good in a way.

Eventually he gave up and retreated to somewhere else in the house.

I stood rooted to the spot until I was sure he wasn't coming back before falling onto my bed and burying my head in my pillow.

I was used to Axel's couch and when I didn't smell his scent I got disappointed.

_You hate him… You're mad at him… But you miss him… And you only haven't seen him for 4 hours…If that…_

My phone started ringing again and I pulled it out of my pocket to answer it.

"What do you want now Sora?"

A now- familiar chuckle made my body tense up.

"Definitely not Sora. Sorry to disappoint you Roxie."

_Axel…_

"What do you want?"

I forced myself not to sound angry. He couldn't know that something was wrong. I had to make him think that I really didn't want to stay with him.

"Nothing really. Just wondering when you were coming back?"

I wanted to say I was on my way back right now but I didn't... I couldn't...

"I'm not coming back Axel…"

Somehow I managed to sound confident and convincing.

"You're not coming back tonight? You're not at home are you? Do you need me to come get you? I don't have the car anymore though… but I'll be there as fast as I can. What's your address?"

I heard his front door squeak open and his feet hitting the stairs as he ran down them. He wasn't making this easy at all.

"No Axel. I'm not coming back at all. Ever."

His footsteps stopped coming through the phone so I assumed he had stopped. He gave a nervous chuckle.

"What are you talking about? What do you mean you aren't coming back?"

He sounded angry and upset. His voice rose as he spoke.

"I'm not going to interfere in your life anymore Axel...I've already been too much of a bother... Goodbye."

I hung up the phone, and looked at the screen.

I was so tempted to call him...to tell him the truth... but...

_Damn it..._

_I'm scared of what might happen if I tell you... that I... might...just slightly... maybe..._

_Like you._

* * *

><p><strong>I know the spacings really weird. I uploaded it in a hurry DX<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**


	12. Library

Cornered 12

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**AkuRoku~~**

* * *

><p>Three weeks. I managed to not think of Axel at all. Three long, miserable weeks...<p>

_Though his constant phone calls are making it really hard to ignore him…_

I felt pretty good about myself and was ready to rub it in Sora's face the next time I saw him.

_And he said I would mope! Ha! I haven't moped once!_

I allowed myself one night of moping, before I pushed Axel away inside some dark place in my mind where he wouldn't resurface.

I will admit that I slipped a few times but they were so brief that they shouldn't even count. And school easily distracted me, so these slip ups were very few and far between.

School. It was the same as always. I don't show up for a while. People all but forget me, including the teachers. I show up and people act like they've seen a ghost. My teachers shake their head in disappointment before proceeding to give me a list of missing assignments and their due dates.

I usually ignored them and didn't make up my assignments. Because, there had never been a point. But now, the distraction was welcomed with open arms.

I threw myself into my school work and was now pretty much caught up. I only had one more assignment to make up, and that was a research paper for my history class.

In fact, I was on my way to the town's library right now to get started on it. I planned on spending a few hours here finding research material, bullet point some ideas and start a rough draft. Then I was going to check out some books and meet up with Namine and Kairi for lunch.

My friends had taken on the job of filling up my free time, i.e. time to mope over Axel. But... they have taken this task with a vengeance. It was now to the point that the only time I was left alone was when I was at home.

And I had been so set on doing my homework that me and my dad rarely saw each other. This was a good and a bad thing.

No part of me missed the daily beatings, but now that things seemed fine I really had no reason to go running back to a certain red head that I am banned from thinking of.

_Unless you get over your stubborn self and talk to him…_

_**NO!**_

I mentally shook myself and cleared my head as I looked through the shelves of the library for a good book. I wasn't having any luck though. I decided to wait for one of the libraries computer's to open. I gave a resigned sigh and stepped away from the book shelf.

Someone tapped my shoulder and I spun around in surprise. Emerald eyes were boring into me.

I blinked a few times in order to clear my head.

"What the _hell _are you doing here?"

I couldn't think of any reason for Axel to be in the library.

He ignored my question and asked his own.

"You're avoiding me Roxas. You won't answer my calls. And what was that bullshit about you interfering with my life?"

I expected him to be mad but there was a sad, teasing tone in his voice.

The butterflies I usually got from socializing with Axel started fluttering around my stomach.

I could never tell if they were a good or bad thing.

He smiled and winked at me.

Giant, mutated butterflies were in my stomach. I could feel it.

Bad... This is definitely a bad thing.

I ignored his accusation and went straight to what had been bothering me.

"So, how was your _date_?"

I kept my voice carefully neutral as I went back to looking through the books. I knew I shouldn't have asked. I really didn't want to know the answer.

He was taken aback but he shrugged and answered.

"Larxene's always a handful. Changing the subject isn't gonna work. What's wrong? Did I do something?"

_You didn't do anything wrong… Not technically…_

"Nope. I just don't want to stay at your place anymore. I never did. And Larxene's not a big fan of mine so staying with you wasn't doing anything for your relationship with her. All I did was take myself out of the picture. Now things can go back to how they were before you took pity on me."

If I wasn't so upset, Axel's expression just might have been considered funny.

"You think… I was taking pity on you…? And when did I get into a relationship with Larxene!"

I shook my head but I refused to look at him.

"You told me yourself you went on a date with her Axel."

He spun me around and held tight to my shoulders.

"That's what she calls it when we hang out Roxas! I just got into the habit of calling it that too! There's nothing between us! Absolutely N-O-T-H-I-N-G."

I wrenched away from him and shook my head.

"Don't lie! You were holding hands! You kissed!"

I tried to pull away from him again but his grip only tightened.

"I'm not dating Larxene! She kissed me Roxas, and I literally pushed her away when she did."

Every part of me wanted to believe him but it sounded too good to be true. I just squeezed my eyes shut and looked away from him.

"And let's say I was dating Larxene, which I'm definitely not, because I am as gay as a gay man can be, why would it matter?"

My eyes snapped open when he said that and a deep blush traveled across my face.

_Shit! Why, why, why, why, why does__ the world hate me?_

I got flustered and started mumbling, trying to come up with some believable excuse for my behavior but all I could do was deny the obvious.

"It doesn't matter! It doesn't! I could care less about who you date! You're reading too much into this! I don't like you!"

Shock flitted across Axel's face but then it was replaced with his trade mark smug smile.

"I never said you did Roxie. Care to tell me something?"

I finally wrenched myself free of his grasp and put a good distance between us and set my book bag on a library table.

"Fuck you Axel. I thought I made it clear that I don't want you in my life anymore!"

He chuckled and I ignored how much I liked the sound.

"You may not want me in yours but I still want you in mine. Come back Roxas. Please?"

He started out teasing me but then his voice took on a pleading tone that all but had me running back to his apartment.

I even found myself taking a step towards him, but I caught myself just in time and shook my head vigorously.

"I can't Axel! Just drop it!"

Before he could confuse me anymore, I ran past him and out of the library.

It wasn't until I got home that I realized my book bag was still at the library. With Axel.

_Fuck…fuck, fuckidy, fuck, fuck._

* * *

><p>I took my sweet time walking back to the library. I was hoping that Axel had left and that all I would have to do was walk in, grab my bag, and walk out.<p>

The last thing I needed was more time with Axel. Just with one look and he had completely shattered my resolve to forget all about him. He threw all logical thought out of my mind with just a few simple words and now I was more confused than ever.

I wanted to forget him right? I wanted him out of my life right? I ran my hand through my hair and sighed.  
>I don't even know what I want anymore...<p>

I didn't want to interfere with his life more than I already had. I had been upset and left because I had seen him kissing Larxene. But according to Axel there really was nothing between them. Larxene had kissed him, and it hadn't been mutual.

He had made sure to make that very clear to me. And he all but begged me to come back…

_Why…?_

I groaned and dragged my hand down my face before stepping inside the library. I was relieved to find that Axel had indeed left. I ignored the small twinge of a disappointment I felt. Okay, it was more than small but let's skip over that small detail, shall we?

I walked straight to the table I had set my bag on. Or at least I was sure it was the table. My bag wasn't there though. I sweeped the entire library but I still couldn't find it. It wasn't in the lost and found either.

_Where is it…?_

Normally I wouldn't have cared so much about losing my bag, but my mother's letter was in it and I desperately wanted to find it.

"Are you sure you haven't seen it? Can you check lost and found again? Please? It's important!"

The teenage girl that was working the check-out counter barely glanced at me. She just blew a bubble and popped her gum as she stamped a book.

"I already checked. Sorry kid, but it ain't there. Now, are you going to check something out or not? I'm busy here."

I rolled my eyes and stepped away from the counter.

_Busy…yea right…more like annoyed…_

My phone started ringing as I stepped out of the library. It was Axel.

I sighed and answered.

"Hey…What do you want?"

I was too upset about losing my mother's letter to be mad at him or care that I'm supposed to be forgetting him.

He chuckled and I got irritated.

"Look! I'm not in the mood for you and your mind games! If you don't have something important to say I'm hanging up!"

_So much for being too upset to be mad…_

"I have your bag Roxas."

My anger dissipated like it was never there and was replaced with relief.

"Really? I'm at the library. Bring it to me. Please?"

I knew I sounded desperate, but I really didn't care.

"I don't know Roxas. I feel like you owe me an explanation as to why you left so suddenly."

I squeezed my eyes shut and grinded my teeth.

"Axel! Focus, please! My bag!"

"You're bag. Right. I am a camera. Focusing. I'll be there in 5."

I ended the call and collapsed onto the bench outside of the library.

True to his word, Axel showed up 5 minutes later.

I literally ran to him and snatched my bag out of his hand. I ignored his smile and started tearing through the contents of my bag. Everything else I could care less about, but I had to make sure…

I finally got to the pocket I kept her letter in and almost started crying when I found it was still there. I knew that Axel wouldn't have gone through it and taken anything but that illogical fear of losing that letter had been too strong for me to think with reason.

I clutched her letter to my chest and hung my head so Axel wouldn't see my face.

"Roxas? You alright?"

I nodded and did something neither of us expected. I hugged him.

"Thank you…"

He was silent for a few seconds before he ruffled my hair.

"No problem Roxie."

I barely heard him. All I could hear his heart beat sounding in my ear.

I haven't seen him in what seemed like forever, and I inhaled his scent, being sure to memorize it.

I don't know why... but I've longed for the scent of him. Just something to remind me that he wasn't just a figure of my imagination.

I allowed myself to stay like that for a few more seconds before stepping away from him. I hadn't really thought anything of it while I was hugging him but now I was embarrassed. I couldn't bring myself to look at him as I pushed all of my stuff back into my bag.

"Thanks again…I have to go…"

I started to turn away but Axel grabbed my arm.

"Roxas, wait."

I took a deep breath and steeled myself as I turned to face him.

"What?"

His expression was softer then I had seen it and it took me off guard.

"I know you feel like you can't come back, but you can. My door's always open for you. But until you decide to come back, can't we just…hang out? Or something…?"

I didn't understand why he was trying so hard to keep me around. My resolve was faltering.

"Hang out…?"

He nodded and his usual smirk was back.

"Yea. Let's do something tomorrow."

A yes almost escaped my lips before I remembered tomorrow was Friday.

"I can't."

His face fell so I quickly explained so he wouldn't misunderstand.

"Not because I don't want to. I have school."

The relief that filled his eyes baffled me.

"Saturday then. I'll pick you up."

I nodded but then I realized the problems that would cause.

"Umm…Can I just meet you somewhere? My dad…"

It looked like he wanted to say he didn't care about my dad but he didn't push it.

"Sure. I'll call you."

Completely shocked by the turn of events, I just stood there, dumbly watching him walking away.

My phone vibrating snapped me back to reality.

**WHERE R U! **

I slapped my hand to my forehead. Looking for my backpack and talking with Axel had made me late for lunch with Namine and Kairi.

I turned around and started running towards the diner.

_Well at least I'll have something to tell them…_

* * *

><p><strong>I'm not dead, I'm still breathing, the stories still going on, I promise. School started again for me Monday so I was busier than usual and my beta were having...communication issues? I guess that's how I'd describe it. But from now on, I'm probably only gonna have a chapter a week. Don't hold me to that though. It might be sooner, it might be later. Depends on my schedule and how much homework I have to do and it depends on my beta's schedule. So I'm basically asking for patience. ;DD<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

**On another note, I finished Queer as Folk the other day and now I'm trying to decide what I want to watch next. Luke and Noah from As the World Turns or Jean Paul and Craig from Hollyoaks? Or do I wanna watch a yaoi series? Idk, any yaoi suggestions?**


	13. Afraid

Cornered 13

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**Wow! This is up alot faster than I thought it would be! XDD**

**AkuRoku~~**

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Pay up. Now."

Sora smiled smugly and extended his hand towards Riku. They had decided to eat lunch with us but I was starting to wish that they had stayed home.

"Pay up for what…?"

I was afraid to know the answer. Especially since I had just told them about my plans with Axel.

Riku groaned and dug his wallet out of his pocket.

"I bet that you could stay away from Axel for good. You're very stubborn so I thought I'd win."

He slapped a $20 into Sora's hand before hitting him gently on the back of the head.

"While I bet that you couldn't last a month. I knew you'd cave. You like the guy too much."

I glared at the two of them and motioned throwing my fork at them before dignifying them with a response.

Namine beat me to the punch though.

"You two are assholes you know that? You're perfect for each other. Betting on something that so obviously had Roxas upset. You should feel ashamed of yourselves."

I smiled at her and nodded in agreement.

"I couldn't have said it better myself."

I felt a sudden rush of affection towards the blonde and draped my arm across her shoulders.

"Namine's a real friend. Unlike you two."

I shot another glare at Riku and Sora but they didn't seem to care.

"I mean, really. You should've been betting on something more serious. Like when the two of them will get together. Me and Kairi already have a pool going. Do you wanna add to it?"

I balked when she said before looking at her in disgust and scooting as far from her as the booth would allow.

"Excuse me?"

Namine and Kairi looked at me with innocent expressions.

"What? It's bound to happen the way things are going. You're going on a date with him Saturday. It's so obviously heading in that direction. Why deny it?"

I glared across the table at Kairi.

"One, it's not a date. It's not! We're just hanging out. Two, I'm denying it because there's nothing between us. And three, I would appreciate it if you guys would stop betting on my love life!"

A triumphant gleam entered Sora's eyes and I was filled with a sense of foreboding.

"So you admit he's part of your love life then?"

He rested his cheek against his fist and waggled his eyebrows at me. I was beyond tired of them tricking me into saying things I didn't mean.

"I don't admit to anything! You're making it seem like I have a love life when I don't! Especially not with him! Can we please change the subject!"

They all started laughing at me and I slammed my head down onto the table.

"I'm friends with jerks….What did I do to deserve this…?"

I mumbled under my breath but Namine was close enough to hear me. Her expression softened and she patted my head.

"We're sorry Roxas. We'll stop. So, what are you guys going to do Saturday?"

I had been hoping for a subject totally void of Axel but I would take what I could get.

I shrugged my shoulders when I realized I didn't have an answer to her question.

"I don't know. He never said."

I was kind of disappointed in myself for accepting to hang out with him so blindly, but it was Axel. I didn't have anything to worry about.

_Besides how nervous you get around him and the fact that you just might have feelings for him…_

It was easy to admit it to myself but I wasn't ready to tell my friends. They would never shut up about it and besides, it's not like I could act on my feelings anyways.

_You're just a kid to him…_

"Roxas?"

Kairi snapping her fingers in my face snapped me out of my reverie.

"What?"

The concern in Kairi's eyes took me off guard.

"You looked upset Roxas. Is everything alright?"

No. Everything was not alright. I had been excited about hanging out with Axel but now I wanted to run away in the opposite direction and get as from him as I could.

What had I been thinking? I must be a glutton for punishment. This was exactly what I was trying to get away from in the first place.

I shook my head and started tearing my fingers through my hair.

"This is insane! I'm calling him and canceling right now!"

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and was halfway through dialing his number before Sora snatched it out of my hand.

I stared at my empty hands for a few seconds before lunging across the table.

"What the hell is wrong with you! Give me my phone back!"

Sora pulled it out of my reach then Riku grabbed it and shoved it into his pocket.

"What's with the sudden change of heart Roxas? Give us a good reason for you to cancel and I'll give you your phone back. I'll let you push away the best thing that's ever happened to you without saying a word."

We glared at each other for a few moments before I gave a resigned sigh and looked away from him.

"I've told you this already…I don't want to interfere in his life…"

I didn't sound convincing at all and I could tell by the way they were looking at me that they didn't believe me.

"Just admit that you like him Roxas—"

"Sora…"

"—and that you don't want to get too close—"

"Sora!"

"—because you're afraid of getting hurt!"

"I can't Sora!"

"Why not Roxas!"

"Just drop it!"

We were glaring at each other again but this time I didn't look away. Sora was right about me being afraid to get hurt but I didn't him, or any of them, to know that. They could easily convince me that I had nothing to worry about.

Sora opened his mouth to say something else but Namine silenced him with a glare.

"I agree with you Sora but let's not talk about this here. People are staring cause you're so loud."

She hissed at us through clenched teeth. I didn't understand why she was so worked up but then I remembered she worked here and the woman glaring at our table was more than likely her boss.

"Fine. I should be going anyways. Homework…and my dad's probably wondering where I'm at… See ya."

I laid a $10 on the table to pay for my food and left before they could convince me to stay. I hadn't even taken two steps out of the diner before Sora came out after me.

He slapped his hand on my shoulder and turned me around.

"What now?"

My voice was sharper than necessary but after our argument a few minutes ago I didn't feel too bad.

He dug his hand into his pocket and held out my phone. I took it but didn't say thanks. I started to turn away but he stopped me.

"Roxas wait. I know I was harsh in there but we both know it's the truth. Don't cancel. You've been miserable the past few weeks but when you told us about hanging out with him you had a legitimate smile on your face. You like him. You know it. We all know it. And he likes you. Stop pushing him away."

I shoved my hands into my pockets and dropped my eyes to the pavement so he couldn't see my face.

"He's 21 Sora…He doesn't like me. I'm just a kid to him…"

Sure I was afraid of getting hurt and losing him, but in order to lose him I had to have him first but that wasn't going to happen so it was a moot point.

Sora chuckled and I contemplated hitting him but it wasn't worth it.

"So are you admitting you like him?"

I hesitated for a few seconds before squeezing my eyes shut and nodding.

"Yes. A lot. Way more than I should cause nothing will ever happen and that's why I've been denying it. That's why I want you guys to drop it. That's why I don't want to get more attached then I already am cause I'm going to lose him eventually."

My voice cracked and my eyes started to sting but I refused to let myself cry. I glared at Sora hoping he knew better than to make fun of me. He did. But he didn't know better than to stare at me with pity.

"Roxas…I'm sorry bud, I love you and all but you really are an idiot. The guys head over heels for you. It's pretty obvious seeing as he's so adamant on keeping you around. Why can't you let yourself be happy?"

I flinched when Sora said that. He thought I was putting myself through this purposefully?

"Alright. I've had enough of this. I'm going home."

"Roxas wait!"

I ignored Sora and started jogging home. On reflex, I headed for the front door. But I had already had a bad day and I wasn't sure what kind of mood my dad was in.

Just to be safe, I walked around to the back of the house and crawled through my bedroom window. I locked my bedroom door before turning off the lights and collapsing onto my bed.

It was only 5 but I was exhausted. I couldn't sleep though. Whenever I shut my eyes, Axel's face popped up.

My phone started going off. All my friends were texting me, asking if I was okay.

I considered turning my phone off but…

_What if Axel calls…?_

I may be mad at Sora but he had convinced me not to cancel on Axel. Actually, I'm not sure if I would've canceled in the first place. Despite my fears of losing him, I couldn't deny how much I wanted to see him again.

Saturday couldn't come fast enough.

* * *

><p><strong>I know it's short! Please don't hurt me! *hides*<strong>

**Reviews please :O)**

**So I decided to watch Nuke (Noah and Luke from As the World Turns) They are just too cute, despite the kissing ban for so many episodes. But that's one thing I like about them. Their relationship isn't just physical and about sex. And I'm also aware that most of you don't care, but some do so :P I love all of you gusy though. :DD**

**And for some I've been getting lots of messages asking me about what my favorite yaoi pairing/anime/manga is. I'm just gonna answer it all here.**

**Pairing: AkuRoku**

**Anime: Tied between Junjouj Romantica and Sekai-Ichi Hatsukoi**

**Manga: Sex Therapist**


	14. Saturday

Cornered 14

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.****  
><strong>

**AkuRoku~~**

* * *

><p><em>Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz.<em>**  
><strong>

I groaned in complaint when my phone started vibrating on my bedside table.**  
><strong>

_Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz._**  
><strong>

I tried ignoring it but it irritated me too much. I threw my arm in the direction of the table and fumbled around for my phone, successfully hitting my elbow on the mahogany wood. I cursed and felt the tingling sensation in my arm grow slowly.**  
><strong>

My hand finally found my phone and I brought my phone to my ear. I didn't even bother to see who was calling me and I answered groggily.**  
><strong>

"What…?"**  
><strong>

I practically growled it but I didn't care. I hated being woken up before my mind was mentally ready.**  
><strong>

"Well good morning to you too Roxie. Should I call back later?"**  
><strong>

My eyes snapped open when I heard Axel's voice. My first thought was that I had slept in but then I realized it was only a few minutes after midnight. I had only been asleep for a few hours.**  
><strong>

_Why the hell is he calling…?_**  
><strong>

I rolled my eyes before shutting them again. I stifled a yawn as I answered him.**  
><strong>

"What the hell do you want Axel? It's midnight…"**  
><strong>

He chuckled and I reveled at the sound.**  
><strong>

"I said I would call you Saturday, didn't I?"**  
><strong>

Okay, technically it was Saturday, but he had just woke me up and I wasn't in the mood for jokes. I was a little glad to hear from him though so I decided to be civil.**  
><strong>

"How about you call me back when the sun's actually up? So I'm awake and mentally prepared to deal with you…"**  
><strong>

Okay, so being civil was out of the question I guess…**  
><strong>

"Ouch, that hurt Roxas. I actually believed you weren't glad to hear from me. You're getting better at acting."**  
><strong>

_Idiot…_**  
><strong>

"If you aren't going to be serious, I'm going to hang up."**  
><strong>

My thumb hovered over the end button as I waited for his response.**  
><strong>

"Alright, I'm sorry. I just wanted to talk to you…I can't wait till later…"**  
><strong>

I forced myself to ignore the pleasure that rolled through me when he said that he couldn't wait to see me. If I lingered on that, I would get my hopes up and I had already accepted that nothing could happen between us.**  
><strong>

"What are we doing anyways?"**  
><strong>

There. Completely blasé and uncaring. It was just going to be an ordinary day. Nothing special.**  
><strong>

_Yea right! Then explain how nervous and excited you are!_**  
><strong>

"That's entirely up to you. What would you like to do Roxas?"**  
><strong>

I thought about it as a yawn escaped me.**  
><strong>

"I want to go back to sleep…"**  
><strong>

The longer I talked to Axel, the harder it got to stay awake. If we didn't hang up soon I was going to fall asleep in the middle of the conversation.**  
><strong>

Axel laughed but I was too tired to be irritated by it.**  
><strong>

"Alright. I'll let you go Roxie. Meet me at the mall tomorrow, okay?"**  
><strong>

I nodded sleepily, forgetting that he couldn't see me.**  
><strong>

"When?"**  
><strong>

It was silent for a few moments and I almost fell asleep before Axel answered.**  
><strong>

"What's too early for you?"**  
><strong>

"Just tell me a damn time Axel!"**  
><strong>

So, I'm cranky when I'm tired. Who isn't?**  
><strong>

"Be there at 10. Good night Roxie."**  
><strong>

I mumbled a goodnight before he hung up. I was out before my phone was back on the table.**  
><strong>**  
><strong>I was out of breath when I finally made it the mall. I stopped running after I made it through the doors to catch my breath and look around for Axel.**  
><strong>

I saw him sitting on the edge of the fountain waiting for me. Every few seconds he would look at his watch and I felt bad for being late.**  
><strong>

_Thanks Dad…_**  
><strong>

I wanted to hurry over to him but I just stood there staring at him. For some reason, it suddenly struck me how much I really cared about him. How much it was going to _crush _me when he eventually walked out of my life for good.**  
><strong>

It was inevitable. It would happen, but what was I going to do about it?**  
><strong>

Walk away now, or spend as much time with him as I could until it happened?**  
><strong>

I hadn't had time to think it through and make a decision. Axel had caught sight of me. Relief filled his face and then he smiled at me as he motioned for me to walk over to him.**  
><strong>

I wanted to but I didn't. I just stood there, staring at him, rooted to the spot. **  
><strong>

He continued to smile at me, but when he realized I wasn't going to move he got worried. He sat there for a few more seconds, before he got up and walked over to me.**  
><strong>

"Hey Roxie. You're late. Thought you were gonna stand me up."**  
><strong>

He was smiling at me again but I could still see the worry in his eyes. No wonder, I was just gaping at him. Not saying a word. Eventually his smile faltered.**  
><strong>

"Seriously, Roxas? What's wrong? Did something happen? You're scar…What happened to your face!"**  
><strong>

I started to shake my head when he asked if something happened, but I flinched when he suddenly raised his voice.**  
><strong>

His expression softened when I took a step away from him. He reached his hand out to cup my cheek and he ran his thumb under the cut that resided there.**  
><strong>

"I'm sorry. What happened?"**  
><strong>

I recalled my dad slapping me and his ring cutting into my cheek. He wanted to know where I was going but I couldn't tell him. If I told him I was going to the mall he wouldn't have let me go. And it was Saturday so I knew he wouldn't believe me if I said I had to do something for school.**  
><strong>

I reluctantly pulled away from Axel's touch and looked at him with caution.**  
><strong>

"You already know what happened…It's not as bad as it looks."**  
><strong>

Axel's gaze hardened, and he started to say something but I silenced him with a glare.**  
><strong>

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before grinning at me. **  
><strong>

"And he speaks."**  
><strong>

I rolled my eyes and fought back the grin that wanted to form on my lips.**  
><strong>

"Idiot…What are we doing?"**  
><strong>

He chuckled as he threw his arm across my shoulders and we started walking into the mall.**  
><strong>

I considered pulling away from him, but I didn't. I liked the feeling of his arm around me too much.**  
><strong>

"I was thinking we'd walk around for a bit, do some shopping, hit a movie, and grab something to eat. Unless there's something else you'd rather do?"**  
><strong>

I couldn't think of anything else. The only thing going through my mind was that what Axel had planned could be thought of as a date.**  
><strong>

_Ah hell…_**  
><strong>**  
><strong>"Admit it! You had fun."**  
><strong>

I rolled my eyes and laughed in spite of myself.**  
><strong>

"Fun? How was any of that fun? You insisted on buying me things I don't want or need, the movie was horrible, and the food at the restaurant sucked. You seriously dropped the ball Axel."**  
><strong>

I really had had fun today with Axel, but I wasn't going to admit that to him any time soon. The day had passed by in a blur and before I knew it, it was over.**  
><strong>

"Geez Roxas, you really know how to hurt a man's pride. So tell me, what exactly were you expecting?"**  
><strong>

I shrugged my shoulders and thought it over.**  
><strong>

"I don't know…It really wasn't all that bad. Anything's fine as long as I'm out of my house…Makes me feel like I actually have _something _out there waiting for me."**  
><strong>

I winced when I realized how depressed I sounded. I was ruining the night and I glanced apologetically at Axel.**  
><strong>

"Sorry for dumping all that on you…"**  
><strong>

He grinned and winked at me as he draped his arm across my shoulders. He had done it all day so the initial reaction to shrug it off was long gone.**  
><strong>

"Don't worry about it. I'm here if you need to talk. About anything. And you do have something Roxas. Even if it doesn't seem like it."**  
><strong>

I shook my head and smiled at him sadly.**  
><strong>

"I know I have nothing…but I'm okay with that Axel. It's easier having nothing…nothing can be taken away from me…"**  
><strong>

He brought us to a stop and he stared at me intently.**  
><strong>

"You do have something Roxas. You have your friends. You have… me."**  
><strong>

It startled me when he included himself in the people that I had. He had no idea how much that meant to me and he never would. I couldn't let him know how much he meant to me.**  
><strong>

"Yea and I'm terrified of losing…my friends. Everyone leaves eventually…"**  
><strong>

My mom had left, my dad would leave, my friends and Axel would get fed up with me and do the same at some point. I had come to terms with the fact that I would end up alone.**  
><strong>

I turned away from him and tried to start walking again but he grabbed my shoulders and made me face him.**  
><strong>

"Hey! Your friends aren't going anywhere! I'm not going anywhere! They are here for you, I'm here for you. You need to know that."**  
><strong>

I stared at him dumbly, not saying anything, until he shook me a little.**  
><strong>

"You know that I'm not going to leave you right?"**  
><strong>

I turned my face away from his and shut my eyes.**  
><strong>

"You say that now but you will. We live two completely different lives. You have no connection to me. There's nothing holding you to me. Ugh! This isn't even about you! This is about me and my friends…"**  
><strong>

Axel chuckled and rolled his eyes as he pulled me into a hug.**  
><strong>

"When are you going to realize that I can't leave you alone Roxas?"**  
><strong>

As much as I wanted to go on being hugged by Axel forever, I couldn't. I stepped away so that he was holding me at arm's length.**  
><strong>

"That's cause you pity me Axel…Nothing more…"**  
><strong>

He flicked me on the forehead. I realized what he had done and tried to slap his hand away a second too late.**  
><strong>

"Hey!"**  
><strong>

"I can't leave you alone because I care about you Roxas...You're my friend…"**  
><strong>

My heart skipped a beat when he said he cared about me, but it plummeted when he called me his friend.**  
><strong>

_That's all I'll ever be to him…His friend…A kid…_**  
><strong>

I nodded numbly and we started walking again. This time in silence.**  
><strong>

I'm not sure why I was so shocked. I knew from the start that I could be nothing more than a friend to him, but hearing him say it…**  
><strong>

I hadn't realized where we were going until we were standing in front of the door of his apartment.**  
><strong>

He unlocked the door and stepped inside before turning to look at me.**  
><strong>

"Roxas? Are you gonna stand out there all night or are you gonna come in?"**  
><strong>

I knew that going into his apartment would be crossing a line. I just wasn't entirely sure if it was a line I was ready to cross.**  
><strong>

The smart decision would be to leave now and never look back. Sure it would hurt, but it would hurt a lot more if I stuck around and got more attached than I already was.**  
><strong>

I shook my head and took a step back.**  
><strong>

"I need to go home…"**  
><strong>

Axel smiled at me encouragingly as he shook his head.**  
><strong>

"We both know that's not a good idea Roxas. Stay here tonight. We'll figure out something in the morning."**  
><strong>

I shook my head again and took another step back towards the stairs.**  
><strong>

"I can't come inside Axel…"**  
><strong>

"Why not?"**  
><strong>

I wasn't sure how to make him understand.**  
><strong>

"Because! I feel safe with you Axel!"**  
><strong>

He looked bewildered and confused by my sudden exclamation.**  
><strong>

"Why's that a bad thing?"**  
><strong>

"It just is! If I take one step inside your apartment I won't want to leave!"**  
><strong>

"Then don't! Just stay here! It's what I want! And it seems to be what you want!"**  
><strong>

"It doesn't matter what I want Axel!"**  
><strong>

It really didn't. I wanted more than I deserved. Something I could never have.**  
><strong>

I took another step back towards the stairs, ready to run down them.**  
><strong>

"Roxas…Please don't go…"**  
><strong>

That did it. Axel's pleading tone and expression shatter my resolve and the next thing I knew I was inside his apartment. Watching him put blankets and a pillow on the couch just like that first night.**  
><strong>

"You know…I don't need you to protect me Axel…"**  
><strong>

I saw a smile tug at his lips as I plopped down onto the couch next to him.**  
><strong>

"What makes you think I'm trying to protect you?"**  
><strong>

I snapped my head in his direction when he said that. How stupid did he think I was? That was so obviously what he wa…**  
><strong>

I hadn't realized how close he was and static traveled through me when our lips briefly touched.**  
><strong>

I started to automatically pull away, but Axel leaning in and shutting his eyes made me freeze.**  
><strong>

I was caught off guard and didn't know what to do. I loved the feel of his lips against mine but it was over all too soon.**  
><strong>

We stared at each other awkwardly until we both turned away. I was blushing furiously and was too embarrassed to say anything.**  
><strong>

"Sorry Roxas…That was uncalled for…"**  
><strong>

That cut through me, sharper than a knife.**  
><strong>

_He regrets it…_**  
><strong>

I crossed my arms and nodded, hoping my voice wouldn't crack.**  
><strong>

"Yes…Yes it was…"**  
><strong>

We sat there in an awkward silence until, finally, Axel stood up and started walking down the hall.**  
><strong>

"I'll understand if you leave…But I hope you don't. Good night Roxas…"**  
><strong>

I felt the urge to bolt from his apartment, but I knew I wouldn't go through with it. And I somehow knew that he knew I wouldn't leave either.**  
><strong>

I stared after him until his bedroom door shut, before collapsing onto the couch. I buried my head in the pillow and inhaled his scent.**  
><strong>

It was comforting, but at the same time painful.**  
><strong>

The fact that the kiss had meant more to me than it had him was the undeniable proof I hadn't realized I was looking for. The proof that I hoped would never appear.**  
><strong>

At some point tears started leaking out of my eyes and I ended up crying myself to sleep.

* * *

><p><strong>This chapter went through alot of changes. So it's not initially what I planned.<strong>

**Reviews please. :O)**

**I feel like I have to defend myself. I've had constant reviews and messages saying too much bad shit happens in my story. That it's taking too long for Axel and Roxas to get together. Bad shit? I say in the freakin summary his dad abuses him. Too long? Go read freakin Complete 180 if you haven't. Sasuke and Naruto don't get together till chapter 32. How's that for dragging it out? And then I end the damn thing at chapter 48. I'm writing it this way for a reason. 1) It's my story and I've got the whole thing planned out. Within reason. 2) My minds twisted and fucked up. You'll know this if you've talked to me at all. And 3) That's just how love is. It's not all butterflies and freakin rainbows. You've gotta through all kinds of shit to finally be happy. At least I did, so I guess I'm writing from experience. And if you're the one freakin lucky bastard that got everything they wanted without even trying, good for fucking you. I'm happy for you. Let's be friends and you tell me your secret. But my life's been pretty fucked up till about 3 years ago and my writing's is how I deal with it. Lots of personal experiences show up in my stories, so you're really getting an insight into my life. I make my AkuRoku stories so sad and depressing, and fucked up just so I know that my life wasn't as bad as I think it is. That I can make it through all the bad shit and be happy. Is that so wrong?**

**And that's my bitch moment for the week…I'm really a lot nicer then I come across.**


	15. Fear

Cornered 15

**Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me in any way.****  
><strong>

**AkuRoku~~**

* * *

><p>When our lips brushed I froze up in shock. I briefly considered pulling away, but the temptation was too much.<strong><br>**

I had no idea what was going through Roxas' mind as I leaned in to deepen the kiss, but his unresponsiveness forced me to reluctantly release his lips.**  
><strong>

His taste still lingered on my lips as I leaned away from him. I could see the shock, confusion and fear that swam behind his eyes.**  
><strong>

_Fuck…_**  
><strong>

We turned away from each other as the awkwardness of the situation was making the air around us heavier. In an attempt to make things alright I spoke without thinking.**  
><strong>

"Sorry Roxas…That was uncalled for…"**  
><strong>

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Roxas' shoulder's slump as he crossed his arms in a shielding manner.**  
><strong>

"Yes…Yes it was…"**  
><strong>

_I knew it…_**  
><strong>

Sensing the hurt in his words I decided I should give him some space. I pushed myself off of the

couch and headed towards the hallway.**  
><strong>

I stopped and placed my hand on the wall and turned slightly to face Roxas.**  
><strong>

"I'll understand if you leave…But I hope you don't. Good night Roxas…"**  
><strong>

I knew that I might have just pushed Roxas away for good, but I desperately wished he wouldn't leave.**  
><strong>

I knew it was stupid and hopeless to pursue a relationship with him, but I couldn't deny how much I cared about him. How much I wanted him to want me the same way that I wanted him.**  
><strong>

But I'd rather have him in my life in some way than not at all. But that might not even be possible now.**  
><strong>

I had been an idiot in kissing him. I should've listened to my initial reaction and pulled away as soon as our lips had touched.**  
><strong>

I collapsed onto my bed and cringed as Roxas' expression after I kissed him flashed through my mind.**  
><strong>

_What am I going to do…?_**  
><strong>

* * *

><p><em>Come on. Just walk out there and act like nothing happened... Assuming he's still there…<em>**  
><strong>

I woke up an hour ago, but I've spent that hour trying to convince myself to walk out of my bedroom.**  
><strong>

I kept telling myself that I wasn't sure how to face Roxas, but the truth was that I was scared.

What if he was mad? Or worse. What if he had left?**  
><strong>

_And if Roxas did leave, sitting here worrying about it isn't going to make him suddenly come back…_**  
><strong>

I still didn't move though. I continued to sit frozen on my bed as I bore holes into the bedroom door.**  
><strong>

_Who do I think I am? Superman? No matter how long I stare at the door, I'm not going to be able to see through to the living room… The only way to know for sure if everything's okay or not, is by walking out there._**  
><strong>

I finally managed to push myself off of my bed, but I froze up again as I wrapped my hand around my door handle.**  
><strong>

My desperation to see Roxas won out over my fear of him being mad or not being there and I shoved the door open.**  
><strong>

I forced myself to walk calmly down the hallway, only to collapse against the wall in relief when I found Roxas sleeping soundly on my couch.**  
><strong>

_All that worrying for nothing…_**  
><strong>

I couldn't hold back the goofy grin that spread across my face as I continued to stare at the sleeping blonde.**  
><strong>

_Roxas…My Roxas…_**  
><strong>

I frantically shook my head at the possessive thought. I couldn't think about him like that. As much as I wanted it to be true, he obviously didn't feel the same way.**  
><strong>

I wouldn't force myself onto him. As much as I didn't want to, I would back off and give him some space.**  
><strong>

If I managed to do that and get things back to normal, I'm sure he would feel more comfortable with me. If he was comfortable spending time with me, then I could keep him away from his dad. Keep him safe.**  
><strong>

_He doesn't want that though…_**  
><strong>

_He's too damn stubborn!_**  
><strong>

I grounded my teeth together and clenched my fists as frustration rolled through me. But my expression softened when Roxas rolled over and started mumbling in his sleep.**  
><strong>

I couldn't hear what he was saying but his expression told me he was upset about something.**  
><strong>

I approached the couch and leaned over the back of it to gaze down at him. **  
><strong>

_Roxas…_**  
><strong>

I reluctantly looked away from his face when my phone started vibrating.**  
><strong>

**Brkfst 10 n b thr or larxll frk****  
><strong>

I rolled my eyes at Demyx's text before shoving my phone back into my pocket. I usually looked forward to getting breakfast with my friends but I really didn't want to leave Roxas' side.**  
><strong>

_You're supposed to be giving him space, remember…?_**  
><strong>

I gave an exasperated sigh and hung my head. Giving him space was going to be a lot harder than I thought.**  
><strong>I reached towards him to swipe the usual piece of hair out of his face before pushing away from the couch and heading towards the front door.**  
><strong>

I looked back at the sleeping blonde one last time before shutting the door behind me.**  
><strong>

* * *

><p>My eyes snapped open when I heard the front door click shut. I woke up an hour ago but for some reason I decided to fake being asleep when I heard Axel's bedroom door open.<strong><br>**

The memory from last night washed over me for what seemed the millionth time. I couldn't get that kiss out of my head and I had no idea how to face Axel after it.**  
><strong>

I brought my finger to my lips before moving them up to my forehead. **  
><strong>

Nothing was making any sense.**  
><strong>

The kiss seemed to mean nothing to Axel. Like he didn't care about me at all.**  
><strong>

If that was the case, why did he say he wouldn't leave me? Why was he always taking such good care of me? Why did he say he wanted me to stay? Why did he spend five minutes staring at me while I supposedly slept? Why did he brush my hair out of my face?**  
><strong>

All these questions were swimming through my mind as I lay on the couch, staring at the ceiling. Only one thing really concerned me at the moment though.**  
><strong>

_Why did he leave…?_**  
><strong>

I considered running after him but I thought better of it. As much as I cared about him, I couldn't let him know how I felt.**  
><strong>

I knew that there was no chance for us to be together. But that didn't stop me from wanting him to hold me in his arms and tell me everything was going to be okay.**  
><strong>

_Axel…_**  
><strong>

A knock at the door interrupted my pity party. I stared at the door warily before pushing myself off of the couch and answered the door.**  
><strong>

I took a step back and glared at the person in front of me.**  
><strong>

"Oh. It's you. I was looking for Axel."**  
><strong>

Larxene looked at me with disdain-filled eyes as she sidestepped me into the apartment.**  
><strong>

"He's not here. He left five minutes ago…"**  
><strong>

She turned to face me and leaned against the arm of the couch.**  
><strong>

"Shame. I was hoping to walk to breakfast with him."**  
><strong>

I knew from her stance and glare that she was baiting me but I asked anyways.**  
><strong>

"Breakfast...?"**  
><strong>

She threw a toxic smile me way as she started looking at her nails.**  
><strong>

"Yes. The meal people generally eat in the morning? Me and Axe had a breakfast date today."**  
><strong>

I flinched when she said that but then I remembered Axel promising there was nothing between them and shook my head frantically.**  
><strong>

"You're lying. It's not like that between you. He told me…"**  
><strong>She let out a high, cold laugh before walking over to me and patting my cheek.**  
><strong>

"Well, isn't that just cute? You have a little crush on my Axel. Well let me save you some heartbreak. He's not interested."**  
><strong>

Her nails dug into my face, hard enough to make me gasp, but not enough to break my skin.**  
><strong>

I slapped her hand away before putting a good distance between myself and her.**  
><strong>

"He's not your Axel…He's not your anything!"**  
><strong>

She fixed me with a steely glare when I yelled that at her. I felt like I was being stalked by a deadly panther as she took a few sauntering steps toward me.**  
><strong>

"Oh yeah? And what makes you so sure fucking sure about that brat?"**  
><strong>

I started to back away from but I forced myself to stand my ground and glare at her.**  
><strong>

"Because…You're just jealous because Axel likes me!"**  
><strong>

I somehow managed to sound confident even though I knew it wasn't true. I just wanted Larxene to leave. I didn't need her to tell me what I already knew. That I didn't have any chance of being with Axel.**  
><strong>

Tears pricked at my eyes when the truthfulness of that thought hit home.**  
><strong>

Larxene was seething in anger and was practically hissing through her teeth as she started yelling in retaliation.**  
><strong>

"Who the hell do you think you are! Me and Axel share a connection that you can't even begin to understand! Just because he's spending a lot of time with you doesn't make you fuckin special! Why don't you do him a favor and get out of his life for good! You're just an annoying brat, who follows me around like a shadow. You're plaguing my life!"**  
><strong>

Larxene was absolutely terrifying as she towered over me, but I forced myself not to let her get to me.**  
><strong>

"And you're just an annoying BITCH who can't take a hint! Axel's not interested in you! So back the fuck off!"**  
><strong>

I saw red out of the corner of my eye before my vision went back for a few seconds and my cheek started throbbing.**  
><strong>

The fact that Larxene had slapped me finally caught up to me as I brought my hand to my cheek.**  
><strong>

I was used to being hit by my dad, but this was so much worse. So much more humiliating and degrading. I started quaking in fear and tears started to slide down my face. She wouldn't do more than slap me...right...?**  
><strong>

And in the next second Axel was pushing Larxene away from me. That explained the flash of red I saw just before Larxene slapped me.**  
><strong>

"What the hell is wrong with you Larx!"**  
><strong>

Larxene being angry was nothing compared to Axel when he was angry. He looked calm and collected but the fire burning in his eyes would make just about anything run away in fear.**  
><strong>

I had to give Larxen credit though. She didn't flinch at all. I could see the fear in her eyes though.**  
><strong>

"He insulted me Axe…Since when did you defend kids you don't know instead of your friends!"**  
><strong>

Her body started to tremble as she choked out sobs. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't bring myself to hate her. **  
><strong>

I knew what she was going through. She couldn't be with the person she loved. Just like I couldn't be with the person I cared about.**  
><strong>

"Axel I'm fine…Let her go…"**  
><strong>

At first I didn't think he had heard, or he had just decided to ignore me, but after a moment he let her go.**  
><strong>

"Get the hell out of here Larx…"**  
><strong>

She looked at Axel with a pleading look but the glare he threw her way made her whimper and she sprinted out of the apartment.**  
><strong>

I took a sigh of relief but then I realized I was alone in the apartment with Axel.**  
><strong>

I glanced at the couch and I the memory of last night's kiss flashed through my mind again.**  
><strong>"Wanna fill me in on what I just walked in on?"**  
><strong>

I jumped at Axel's voice but then I heard the laughter in it and I relaxed.**  
><strong>

"She told me that I should do you as favor and get out of your life for good…It pissed me off and I told her that she should take a hint cause you're not interested in her…"**  
><strong>

Axel's eyes widened in surprise and he started laughing.**  
><strong>

"No wonder she slapped you. But Kudos to you. I've never seen anyone stand up to her when she's pissed. It took me years to do that."**  
><strong>

He chuckled... **  
><strong>

_Damn... why does he have to laugh like that..._**  
><strong>

He stepped towards me and wiped away the remaining tears on my cheeks.**  
><strong>

"Are you okay?"**  
><strong>

I wanted to lean into the warmth of his hand but I forced myself not to and nodded instead.**  
><strong>

"Yea, I'm fine. Thanks Axel."**  
><strong>

He smiled at me and grinned back slightly.**  
><strong>

"So why did she say that you should get out my life?"**  
><strong>

I felt myself start to blush as I remembered what I had said to her.**  
><strong>

"Umm…She said that and some other things because I said that she was jealous…because you like me…"**  
><strong>

I saw his eyes widen in shock and I turned away from him.**  
><strong>

"Don't worry about it. I know it's not true. I was just trying to shut her up…"**  
><strong>

_I wish it WAS true though…_**  
><strong>

How do you feel about me Roxas…?"**  
><strong>

I froze in my tracks when he said that.**  
><strong>

_Keep calm…_**  
><strong>

I turned to him and gave him a wondering look.**  
><strong>

"What do you mean? You're my f-friend of course."**  
><strong>

I sounded convincing until I stumbled over the word friend.**  
><strong>

Axel leaned against the arm of the couch and gave me a penetrating stare.**  
><strong>

"I think we need to talk about last night Roxas."**  
><strong>

_No. No. NO! NO! I can't do this._**  
><strong>

"There's nothing to talk about…"

He scoffed and gave me a cynical stare before his face crumpled in confusion and frustration.**  
><strong>

"We kissed last night Roxas… How the hell am I supposed to interpret that!"**  
><strong>

I shook my head and turned away from him. I couldn't bear to have him look at me like that.**  
><strong>

"No! Our lips brushed and YOU kissed ME. I didn't want that…"**  
><strong>

I felt like I was about to shatter. I wrapped my arms around myself in a failing attempt to keep myself in one piece.**  
><strong>

He walked around so he was facing me and I started to turn away but he wouldn't let me. He pushed me against the wall and pinned my hands with his.**  
><strong>

"Let's stop with the lies and denial for just one _fucking_ second Roxas! I like you. You like me. Just admit it!"**  
><strong>

I turned my head away from him and shut my eyes.**  
><strong>

"No! I don't like you Ax—"**  
><strong>

He leaned in and cut me off by capturing my lips with his.**  
><strong>

I hadn't been expecting him to do that. And I sure as hell hadn't been expecting my reaction.

Every fiber of my being screamed to respond but I wasn't giving in.**  
><strong>

I bit down on his lip, hard, and he released my lips so he could utter a growl.**  
><strong>

"Stop fighting me Roxas."**  
><strong>

He kissed me again and crushed me to him. There was no space between us and I was struggling to breathe. But in spite of my fear, I found myself starting to melt into his embrace.**  
><strong>

But I caught myself and pushed myself away from him. Or as much as his hold on me would allow.**  
><strong>

"Stop it Axel! You're hurting me! I'm scared!"**  
><strong>

My voice broke but I managed to hold back the tears that were fighting to break through.**  
><strong>

His grip loosened a bit but he continued to hold me.**  
><strong>

"I'm sorry…"**  
><strong>

Then he let go of me completely and ran his fingers through his hair as he turned away from me. I barely caught the tortured expression that had taken over his face.

"Go on…Leave…"

His voice took on a chilling tone that sent shivers running down my spine.

I rubbed my wrists as I stared at his back. I didn't want to leave. Despite how much he scared and confused me, I still held an illogical speck of trust in him.

"Axel…"

"Just get the hell out of here Roxas!"

I flinched at his tone and ran out the door after a moment's hesitation.

Why...why can't I admit it...?

* * *

><p>REALLY REALLY REALLY LOVE THIS CHAPTER! IT'S MY FAVORITE SO FAR!<p>

Hope you guys enjoyed it as well ;DD


	16. Pain

Cornered 16

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**AkuRoku~~**

* * *

><p>"Axel…"<p>

"Just get the hell out of here Roxas!"

I heard the quick intake of his breath before Roxas ran out of my apartment. The door shut behind him with a soft click.

I had instantly regretted my words and felt an overwhelming urge to chase after him.

But I didn't.

I just stood there, silently cursing myself and my stupidity. I ran my fingers harshly through my hair as the fullness of what had just happened hit me.

_What the hell is WRONG with me…!_

"_Don't worry about it. I know it's not true. I was just trying to shut her up…"_

Any intelligence I may have possessed left me when Roxas made the assumption that I didn't have any feelings for him.

"_How do you feel about me Roxas…?"_

I hadn't been thinking logically when I confronted him in turn about his feelings for me.

I wasn't in control of myself when I kissed him. Couldn't help my anger when he bit my lip and tried to pull away from me.

I should've let him go then, but that thought didn't even cross my mind as I molded his body to mine and captured his lips once again.

He didn't want to admit his feelings? Fine. I'd force him to admit how he felt about me. And there wasn't any doubt in my mind anymore.

Roxas had feelings for me. The scenario between him and Larxene was all the proof I needed. Larxene didn't confront people unless she felt threatened by them. And if Roxas just might possibly return the feelings I felt for him she'd want to do something about it.

Sure I'd already made up my mind to give him some space, but that was before I knew the brat liked me back. We felt the same way. We could easily start something. So why did he continue to push me away?

"_Stop it Axel! You're hurting me! I'm scared!"_

The desperate and terrified tone that entered Roxas' voice broke through my moment of insanity.

I cringed as I recalled the frightened look on Roxas' face just before I let him go. I hated myself for causing it. I couldn't stand seeing him like that so I turned away from him.

Guilt enveloped me once again as I recalled the words I had shouted at him.

It knew I had waited too long but I turned around and ran out of my apartment, running down the stairs two at a time. He might be close enough for me to catch him.

No luck. He was completely out of sight. I glanced briefly at my phone but I knew it was hopeless. There was no way he was going to answer after what had just happened.

My body took on autopilot as I wandered upstairs and back into the confines of my apartment.

The silence that greeted me shouted Roxas' absence. I collapsed onto the couch and inhaled his lingering scent.

"Roxas..."

* * *

><p>I was in such a haze after what happened with Axel, that I barely remembered anything after leaving.<p>

I just drifted through the streets, bumping into people and earning myself disgruntled glares.

I was so out of it that I almost wandered into an intersection full of oncoming traffic. If it weren't for the person standing next to me I would've been road kill.

After that I kept a steady grip on my arm to remind myself to focus on my surroundings. But even that didn't help. I was gripping my arm so tight that my fingernails dug into my skin and drew blood.

I flinched at the unexpected onslaught of pain and looked around myself defensively. No one was there. I was all alone, standing on my front porch.

I wasn't sure how long I had been standing there but a sudden gust of cold wind drove away my curiosity and I pushed my way inside.

Silence and darkness met me as I took my usual cautionary steps into my house. I peeked my head into the kitchen, but my dad wasn't there.

I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water before stepping into the living room, but he wasn't there either.

I swallowed a nervous breath as I backtracked back to the hallway. I made sure to tread carefully down the hall so he wouldn't know of my presence.

I kept telling myself that I did this every time I came home, but I knew this time was different.

Instead of trying to figure out what room to avoid, keeping myself safe, I was searching him out. Stupid, I know, but I was past thinking rationally.

I stopped in front of his bedroom door and listened. Soft snores met my ears and a morbid smile flitted across my face.

Him being asleep was even better. He would be beyond pissed when I woke him up. He'd come after me. He'd want to teach me a lesson. He'd inflict pain on me.

_Pain…_

I normally shied away from it, but right now I needed it more than ever.

Anything to drive away the terrible clenching feeling deep in my chest… It felt like giant, steel claws were clenched around my heart and refused to let go.

_Axel's claws…NO! I can't blame him…It's my fault…All the more reason to punish myself._

I raised a shaking fist to my dad's door and briefly hesitated before knocking.

His snoring faltered before he started cursing under his breath. I was relieved that he had woken up so easily…Until I heard the springs in his mattress scream in protest as he started to move.

_There's no backing out now…_

I backed up against the wall opposite to his room as I heard him approaching the door. His footsteps seemed to resound in my head like a never ending echo.

I attempted taking deep, calming breaths but it didn't work. My pulse went into overdrive and my heart beat was erratic.

Time seemed to stop briefly after his doorknob turned and opened with a click. Then life resumed and there he was, towering over me and looking at me like he had never seen me clearly before.

"Morning Dad…"

I forced myself to stand my ground and meet his challenging glare.

"This better be _fucking_ good boy!"

His eyes were bloodshot and the vein in his neck popped when he raised his voice.

I flinched but fought my instinct to run and took a step towards him. My tears started flowing at just the right time.

"I'm sorry Dad…"

My dad hated being disturbed and disobeyed, but I knew what he hated even more.

Emotions. Showing weakness.

His eyes were drawn to my tears like magnets and he narrowed them a second later.

"What the hell's wrong with you! Waking me up and crying like a girl!"

He was mad, but yelling wasn't going to be enough. I needed him to lash out at me.

Every instinct in my body told me to back away from my father, but I did just the opposite.

I took another step towards him and wrapped my arms around him. His body tensed up at the foreign contact and I smiled a grim smile.

I was so close. I just needed to push him that last inch…

I buried my face into his chest and choked out the sobs I couldn't hold back any longer.

"What…What the hell do you think you're doing!"

He tried to shove me away from him, but I refused to let go.

"No! Dad please! Just hold me! I just need you to tell me that everything's going to be okay…"

Axel's face swam behind my blurred vision and I cringed as I felt my heart clench. What I really wanted was for Axel to hold me and whisper reassuring words.

My thoughts were so consumed by Axel that I barely noticed my father's laying his hands on my shoulders.

The gentle gesture took me by surprise and I lowered my guard to look at him questioningly but then he dug his fingers deep into my skin and I gasped at the pain.

I was so used to trying to escape the pain that I almost forgot that pain was what I had been searching for. Then I was reveling in the pain my father had inflicted. For a brief moment I forgot about the pain in my heart.

Then he released my shoulders and my heart began to throb again. The whimper that escaped my lips took both of us by surprise.

But it fueled his anger and all the air in my lungs was pushed out of me when he threw me against the wall.

The dull throbbing in my lower back was a welcomed relief. I hadn't realized that I was smiling until my dad had me by the throat.

"What are you so happy about, you little piece of shit!"

I barely heard the chuckle that escaped my lips. A ringing began in my ears as a result of my dad punching me on the side of the head.

I glared up at him, enticing him to hurt me some more. He hesitated, unsure of my behavior.

Usually by now I would've curled in on myself and waited for him to finish.

But the fact that I wasn't scared, seemed to scare him.

I wiped my fist across my mouth, wiping away the blood that had congealed under my nose.

"What's wrong Dad? That the best you got?"

His lip curled up into a snarl at my taunting words and he punched me again. This time he aimed at my eye. I felt the blood rush towards it as it began to swell.

The distracting pain lost its novelty as my body began to register just how hurt it was. But just because I was done, didn't mean that my dad was.

He met my challenge head on and slammed my head back into the wall and forced me to look at him.

"Learn your place Roxas!"

I'm not sure when my tears had stopped, but fresh tears started leaking out of my eyes as I stared at the poor, pathetic man in front of me.

"Did Mom know her place…?"

Those words were past my lips before I could even comprehend that I had been wondering it for the longest time.

My dad's reaction was just as unexpected. He flinched as if he had been slapped and his hand dropped from my throat as if I had electrocuted him.

"How dare you…How dare you even suggest that I would EVER lay a hand on her! You killed her! You deserve this!"

He aimed a couple of kicks at me but he was so distraught by my accusation that only one hit home.

He threw one last disgusted look my way before retreating back to his bedroom and slamming the door behind him.

I remained a crumpled heap on the floor a few moments longer before standing up and using the wall as support to get into my bedroom.

* * *

><p>My initial reaction after the ice pack touched my face was shock, but then the soothing effect set in and I let out a content sigh.<p>

"Thanks Kairi…"

She sat down in the chair next to my bed and offered me a smile.

"No problem hun."

I started to say something but then I noticed hardened blue eyes glaring at me from across the room.

"Stop being so nice to him Kairi! He doesn't deserve it…"

I winced at her hissing tone but then my bad mood got the better of me.

"Just spit it out Namine! I already said I'm sorry! What more do you want?"

Her gaze softened a little bit but she still continued to glare at me.

"Sorry? You think 'sorry' can make up for _years _of lying to me? I'm not as forgiving as Kairi Rox."

The use of my nickname told me that she wasn't as mad as she appeared to be. She was just upset, hurt, and confused.

I tried, once again, to explain to her why I had lied to her but the sudden unbearable pressure on my face made me gasp in pain and pull away from Kairi.

"What the hell Ka…!"

But the expression on Kairi's cut me off mid-accusation. Then her back was to me and she rounded on Namine.

"Care to explain how, once again, it becomes all about Namine!"

Everyone in the room flinched at Kairi's tone. I couldn't remember a time she had ever been legitimately angry. But Namine had known her much longer, and wasn't surprised by her outburst.

Namine crossed her arms and glared at Kairi but I could see the uncertainty in her eyes.

"I don't know what you're talking about…"

Kairi scoffed as she collapsed onto the bed next to me. I glanced over at her and was surprised by the tears sliding down her cheeks.

"You think that it was easy to hear that Roxas gets the crap beat out of him every day? That every bruise that I've asked about he lied to me about? But am I being a bitter BITCH about it? NO! So back of—"

"Enough!"

I was so intent on the girls' argument that I almost forgot Riku and Sora were in the room with us.

I looked over in their direction and Sora was trembling in anger.

"Roxas didn't call us over here so that you two could throw a bitch fit!"

If I weren't so upset I might've laughed at the pissy expressions on Kairi and Namine's faces. But then they relaxed and turned apologetic eyes on me.

"I'm sorry Rox…"

We all started laughing when they spoke at the same time. Kairi scooted closer to me and rested her head on my shoulders while Namine strutted over and fell into my desk chair.

"Alright, how'd you fuck up this time?"

It always astounded me how easily Namine could act like nothing had happened. While Kairi would feel guilty about it for weeks.

Kairi sniffled and wiped her nose before addressing Namine.

"What makes you think Roxas fucked up?"

I noticed Riku and Sora exchange a look and I squirmed in discomfort. Kairi really was the only one that had any faith in me.

Namine rolled her eyes and let out a little laugh.

"Because it's Roxas and yesterday was his 'non-date' with Axel. Let me guess, once again you were too stubborn to admit how you feel?"

Her penetrating gaze made me feel like I was on trial.

"Who says I feel anything for him…?"

I threw a glare Sora's way but he didn't look abashed.

"I didn't say a word bud. I told you, it's beyond obvious."

I groaned as fell back onto my bed and pulled my pillow over my head.

I heard chuckles float around my room as my desk chair squeaked and an extra weight was added to my bed as Namine sat on my other side.

"Tell us what happened Roxas. We're gonna find out eventually."

I pulled my pillow away and glared at Riku.

"Nothing happened!"

I sounded slightly convincing but my lips tingled at the lie. I could still feel Axel's lips on mine. His strong arms wrapped around me. The way our bodies molded together…

"Then what's with the sappy look on your face?"

The mischievous grin on Sora's face gave me a really bad feeling. I'd had every intention of being as vague as possible when I talked to them about Axel, but all of a sudden I had an urge to really talk to them about it.

"He kissed me…Twice…"

I buried my head back into my pillow and waited for their reaction.

From the left of me someone started running their fingers through my hand in a soothing manner. I knew it was Kairi but I started to imagine that it was Axel comforting me instead.

"Why's that a bad thing hun?"

I shook my head and pulled the pillow away from my face.

"It wasn't…but I ruined it…"

The glare Sora threw Namine's way made me guess that she was about to say something along the lines of I told you so.

"How do you ruin a kiss…? It's t really hard to do that Roxas..."

If I didn't think Kairi and Namine would hold me back I would've lunged at Sora. That and Riku would kick my ass if I hurt Sora.

I was already regretting getting into this conversation but it was too late to back out. So I took a deep breath and quickly explained to them what happened last night and this morning.

When I was finished silence echoed around the room. Then Kairi and Namine slapped me on the back of the head.

"Ow! What the hell was that for!"

"For being an idiot!"

I glared at the both of them as I rubbed away the throbbing in my head.

"Why didn't you tell him how you felt Roxas?"

I reluctantly turned towards Sora's accusing gaze.

"I was scared…"

"Do you regret leaving?"

I nodded weakly and fought back the tears that wanted to escape my eyes.

"Then march your ass over to his apartment and tell him how you feel!"

I glared at Namine and shook my head frantically.

"How am I supposed to do that after adamantly saying I don't like him? He won't listen to me…"

Namine gave a resigned sigh as she pushed herself off of my bed. She stood in front of me and placed her hands on my shoulders.

"Make him listen. Show him how you feel."

I didn't understand what she was getting at.

"How?"

I waited for her to give me an answer but instead she leaned forward and kissed me.

I froze up in shock when her lips met mine. Just as I was about to shove her away, she pulled away on her own.

"That's how."

I stared at her dumbly before wiping my hand across my mouth, trying to erase the invasion.

"Namine!"

They all started laughing at my reaction.

"What's wrong Roxas?"

I stared at her as if she was missing something obvious.

"I'm gay!"

"And? What's your point?"

"You're a girl!"

I threw a glare in Riku and Sora's direction to make them stop laughing but it didn't help.

"What? Afraid you're gonna get cooties? I was trying to make a point. Actions speak louder than words. You hadn't been expecting that and I caught you're attention. Next time you're with him, kiss him."

I groaned and leaned over to lay my head on Kairi's shoulder.

"You make it sound so easy…"

Namine stuck her hip out and glared at me.

"Do I need to demonstrate how easy it was to kiss you again?"

I cringed at the thought and backed away from her.

"That's not the problem…I don't think he wants anything to do with me now…"

Sora walked over and patted me on the back. He started to say something but then the front door opened and shut. My dad was home.

"You guys have to go. Now!"

Namine glared at my bedroom door.

"We should stay Roxas. You shouldn't be alone with him…"

She looked determined but her voice cracked with fear.

"Roxas!"

We all flinched when my dad hollered my name.

"Go! I don't know if he'll try to hurt you guys or not…I don't want to risk it! Go out the window! Hurry!"

They hesitated for a moment before climbing out my window.

Sora was the last out and he turned to face me before following the others.

"Call later okay?"

I nodded and started to reassure him but my door started to open and I pulled my curtains shut just as my dad came into my room.

"Who were you talking to?"

I had my back to my window and was holding the curtains shut behind my back.

"I was on the phone with a friend…"

We both glanced at my phone that was sitting on my desk. Across the room from me.

"Don't lie to me! Who was in here!"

Sure that they would be gone by now I stepped away from my window and walked over to my desk to grab my phone.

"No one. I was on my phone. See?"

I pulled up my call history and showed him my last call to Sora.

I was surprised by my ability to stay calm after confronting him this morning. The tension was still there though.

I jumped when my phone started vibrating and then my face fell when Axel's name popped up along the text message.

Thankfully I had the ring tone on and could act like it was a phone call.

"Could you leave please? This is kinda private…"

I clenched my phone and held my breath as I waited for him to leave.

I heard him approach me and I braced myself for the blow that never came.

He stopped just before he reached me and turned around to leave my room, shutting the door behind him.

Completely confused, I almost forgot about the message from Axel.

**Cn I call u?**

I desperately wanted to hear his voice, but at the same time I was terrified of what he had to say.

I deleted the message and set my phone down on my bedside table before lying down.

It seemed like hours instead of a few minutes when my phone started vibrating once again. I reached for my phone and the vibrations tickled my fingertips.

**U cnt ignr me 4evr Roxie**

Irked by the nickname I sent a reply without even thinking.

**Try me!**

I'm so pathetic…I can't NOT talk to him…

**Y r u upset?**

_Like he has to ask…_

**U kno y…**

The kiss flashed through my mind and tingles of pleasure and uncertainty rolled through me.

**I shldnt hve dne tht…im srry…**

I didn't want him to be sorry…I wanted to stop being a coward.

**Y did u…?**

It took him longer to reply and I started to get really nervous. But when my phone finally vibrated I released the breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

**I ws undr the imprssn tht u didnt hve ne flings 4 me so I ws goin 2 gve u some space & ignr my flings but now tht I kno u do hve flings 4 me Im not bckin off**

The fact that he still wanted something to do with me made me really relieved but something he said set me on edge.

**Wht mkes u thnk I fl tht wy…?**

But I knew there was no point in denying it anymore. There really wasn't.

**Bc Im nt a fckin idiot Roxas!**

I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped my lips when I read that. I couldn't help my response either.

…**Coulda fooled me…**

**I rlly need 2 tlk 2 u Roxas…**

My breath hitched at the thought of seeing Axelbut my fear prevented me from typing yes.

**2 soon…time…plz…?**

I waited and waited for a reply but one never came. So course I started to freak out.

What did it mean? Was he giving me the time I asked for? Or was he mad that I wouldn't talk to him?

I started to type up another a message but then a knock came from the front of my house.

I really didn't think anything of it until I heard my dad yell.

"What the hell are you doing here!"

I pushed myself off of my bed and walked out into the hallway to see who was at the door.

I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw Axel on the front porch. He looked around my dad and winked at me.

I ignored that butterflies that started flying around my stomach and started silently cursing the idiot to the depths of hell.

_What the HELL is he thinking!_

My dad moved so that I could no longer see Axel and started to shut the door.

"Get the fuck away from my house!"

"I need to see Roxas…"

An edge coated Axel's voice that I had never heard before. His emerald eyes glazed over with a newfound coldness and his mouth set into a thin line as he threw his fist into the side of the house.

I flinched at the sound of the impact and held my breath as I waited for my Dad's reaction.

"I don't care what you _need! _You are going to leave, never come back, and stay the hell away from my son!"

_NO!_

My dad's tone made my skin crawl.

Axel took deep shuddering breaths as he removed his fist from the side of the house. I noticed blood dripping from his knuckles before he covered it with his good hand.

He was injured because of me but somehow he still managed to give me a reassuring smile over my dad's shoulder.

_Idiot…_

Axel cleared his throat and was very straightforward as he spoke to my dad.

"I don't think you understand! I'm not leaving here without talking to Roxas, now either let me in or let him out."

My dad's hands flew out, grabbed Axel by the collar of his jacket, hauled him inside and threw him up against the wall.

I wanted to help Axel but I was frozen in fear. All I did was let out a pathetic whimper.

Axel tried twisting away from him but he wouldn't let go.

"Get off!"

Dad cocked his head and laughed quietly.

"Not so tough now, are you?"

Dad threw Axel back into the wall and he winced in pain.

"Dad! Stop!"

He glared at me and I stopped in my tracks.

"Stay out of this boy or you'll be next!"

Axel struggled and regained my dad's attention.

"If you lay a hand on him I'll call the police!"

I shook my head. Threatening him wasn't going to help.

"If you call the police, I'll kill you. It's as simple as that. Now get the hell off of my property!"

He flung Axel onto the porch and slammed the door in his face.

Dad turned to me and I fought the instinct to run. He started to laugh and it was the most sinister sound I had ever heard.

"You stay away from him Roxas. Or I'll kill you both."

My breathing was rapid and shallow; my hands were drenched in sweat as Dad walked past me.

I had expected him to turn on me. As soon as I knew he wasn't going to, I ran back to my room and locked the door behind me.

My eyes started to burn and I fought the urge to sob as I slid down my door and onto my bedroom floor.

* * *

><p>I cried for a little while. Then I tried calling Axel again but it went straight to voice mail just like all the other times. And my stupid old computer wasn't working so e-mail was out. I hadn't been going to school lately so doing homework was out. After going through all that, I was tired. I decided to go to bed ridiculously early.<p>

But I couldn't sleep. The window above my bed was open and I can hear the cool evening wind rustle leaves of the tree next to the house. There's a slight tinge of yellow in the sky that makes the familiar view of the neighborhood's rooftops seem almost mystical. The air smells electric, and the whole sky gathers its strength, waiting for a storm to breach.

I've always loved thunderstorms. I'm not really sure why, but there's something about them that I find soothing.

The first few drops of rain hit the screen and stick to the tiny squares, creating odd patterns. As it starts to rain harder and faster, the patterns expand until the screen's drenched and starts to drip onto the window sill. A little spray comes through the window and sprinkles my face.

Then the lightning strikes and the thunder rolls through the sky, emerging from purple clouds. They roll and flicker in a soothing rhythm, lighting up the sky in quick bursts.

I looked out my window and watched the storm work its course. I was completely mesmerized by it until the rain hitting my face became too much.

Reluctantly, I pushed myself off of my bed and shut my window.

Without the calming effect of the thunderstorm, I reverted back to stress mode.

_Axel… Will I ever see you again…?_

* * *

><p>I'm not sure when I fell asleep but around 10 my phone started ringing and woke me up.<p>

I fumbled for my phone and brought it to my ear after answering.

"Hello…?"

My voice came out as a croak after crying myself to sleep.

"Roxas…Are you okay…?"

I shot straight up when I heard Axel's voice.

"Axel—"

I heard my dad groan from the next room and I quickly reigned in my voice.

"What is wrong with you! I told you to give me some time and you show up here anyways! Then you don't answer any of my calls!"

I expected excuses and apologies but instead I got laughter.

"This is not funny!"

He laughed some more before saying anything.

"I'm sorry Roxas. My phone died on my way over here earlier so I never got your last text."

And that explained why he never answered my calls.

"Oh…"

The line went silent for a while. I was embarrassed and had no idea what to say to him.

"Turn your light on."

I didn't really hear him at first. I was too busy pondering Namine's suggestion of kissing him the next time I saw him.

"I'm sorry, what?"

He chuckled and I was back to being irritated.

"Turn on your light. I don't know which room is yours."

He made it sound like he was outside of my house, so instead of turning on my light I walked over to my window and opened the curtains.

Sure enough, the idiot was standing in my backyard looking like he belonged there.

I rolled my eyes and hung up my phone so I could open the window.

He smiled as he hung up as well and began walking up to my window.

"What the hell are you doing here? If my dad catches you here…"

He scoffed and winked at me. I hoped that the darkness of my room was able to hide my blush. But the look in his eyes told me it wasn't.

"So you're worried about me then huh Roxie?"

I glared at him and went to slam my window shut but he leaned forward and climbed into my bedroom before I could stop him.

"Who would be worried about you…?"

I grumbled under my breath but his chuckle told me that he had heard every word.

I clutched my fingers around my window sill, forcing myself not to turn and look at him.

"You really can't be here Axel…My dad…"

As much as I loved the idea of him being in my bedroom, I was terrified of what my dad would do if he caught him here.

I suddenly felt his warmth at my back and shivers traveled down my spine at his close proximity. He wrapped his hand around mine and my pulse sky-rocketed.

"I'm not worried about him. I'm worried about you Roxas…"

My breathing hitched when I felt his breath ghost across my neck. He interpreted my silence wrong and dropped my hand and stepped away from me.

"But I'll leave if that's what you want…"

I reached and grabbed his hand without thinking. I saw the relief and confusion swim in his emerald eyes before he smiled at me.

"You're killing me Roxas…Tell me what you really want."

I swallowed nervously and squeezed his hand tighter. If I didn't make my feelings clear to him, nothing would change.

_Just do it!_

Completely unsure of myself, I stepped in quickly and kissed him. Soft and sweet. Our breath mingled and I leaned into Axel. He held onto me, but not too tight this time. But he didn't have anything to worry about. I wasn't scared anymore.

It was over and Axel was crawling back through my window way too soon.

"Wait…Don't go…"

He chuckled and I flushed at how needy I sounded.

"I thought you said I couldn't stay?"

I did say that didn't I…?

"Oh…right…"

I fumbled for something to say but then he was leaning towards me and I lost any coherent thought. His lips met mine and my eyes fluttered shut at the contact.

I tilted my head and kissed him back eagerly, loving the feel of his lips against mine. His hand at the nape of my neck, pulling me closer. I placed my hands on his chest and reveled at the firmness beneath.

Adrenaline raced through me, leaving my body heavy and eager for more. I opened my mouth beneath his and filled my lungs with much needed air. He nibbled on my lower lip and a moan traveled up my throat.

I wanted nothing more than push myself into him more but I couldn't.

_Stupid fucking house…_

Axel captured my lips with his again and I wrapped my arms around his neck, shoving my irritation aside. He ran his mouth along my jaw line and down my throat, igniting a need I'd never felt before.

My skin felt like it was on fire and my body pulsed with unknown desire…and then he pulled away and placed a few gentle pecks on my lips.

"I have to go…"

I whimpered at his words but I knew it was the truth and leaned forward for one more kiss.

"Good night Roxas."

He slipped away, looking back at me with that smile, then walked down the street.

I stood there for a little while, watching him go, his taste and smell still lingering. I'm beginning to understand that I have to savor moments like these. Hold on to them for as long as I can. They might seem like they will last forever, but they don't. I have to take them as they come.

* * *

><p><strong>Lol really long, I know. But I doubt very many of you are going to complain. It's what we've all been waiting for right?<strong>

**Hope you enjoyed.**

**Not really relevant but I had Masterpiece Theatre II by Marianas Trench on repeat while I was writing this. Doesn't really have anything to do with the chapter itself.**

**Next chapters, if you can believe it, is actually longer than this one.**

**Reviews please :O)**


	17. Together

Cornered 17

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.****  
><strong>**AkuRoku~~**

* * *

><p>When I woke up the next morning, I felt like I was going to have a panic attack.<strong><br>**

I'd had my usual nightmare. But instead of my dad holding my mom's dead body, he was holding Axel's. **  
><strong>And it had scared me more than seeing my mom's. Mom was dead. She wasn't coming back. I had come to terms with that long ago. But Axel was here, alive, and with me. And to see him dead like that…**  
><strong>

A violent shiver assaulted my body and I buried my head into my pillow until my fear subsided.**  
><strong>

**"**_You stay away from him Roxas. Or I'll kill you both."_**  
><strong>

As much it scared me that I had blatantly disobeyed him, it was also very liberating. I'm not sure when I had come to this conclusion, but nothing was going to keep me away from Axel.**  
><strong>

Especially now that we were…I don't even know.**  
><strong>

I grabbed my phone off of my night stand and realized I had three missed texts. Two from Axel and one from Sora.**  
><strong>I quickly opened Axel's first.**  
><strong>

**Ur a good kissr u kno tht?****  
><strong>

Blood rushed to my cheeks when I blushed after reading that. I called him an idiot under my breath and opened the next message.**  
><strong>

**Night Roxie ;D****  
><strong>

_Definitely an idiot…_**  
><strong>

I told myself I'd text him back later and went on to Sora's message.**  
><strong>

**Breakfast. Diner. 10.****  
><strong>

I glanced over at my clock and was shocked to see that it was 11:30. If I didn't leave in 10 minutes I'd be late. And I'd never hear the end of it.**  
><strong>

So I hopped out of bed, pulled on some clothes, and ran a comb through my hair before running out of my room.**  
><strong>

That was the easy part.**  
><strong>

**"**Roxas!"**  
><strong>

_Now for the hard part…_**  
><strong>

I sighed and walked towards the living room.**  
><strong>

**"**Yes Dad…?"**  
><strong>

He tore his eyes away from the TV and fixed me with a glare.**  
><strong>

**"**Where the hell do you think you're going!"**  
><strong>

I shuffled my feet and forced myself to look him in the eye.**  
><strong>

**"**Breakfast with my friends…"**  
><strong>

He scoffed and took a drink from his beer. I noted that he was on his fifth one of the day already.**  
><strong>

**"**Friends…?You better not be going to see that red-headed bastard! I told you to stay the hell away from him!"**  
><strong>

I started to frantically shake my head when he brought up Axel.**  
><strong>

**"**No! No…I promise he won't be there. I'm just going to eat with some friends from school…"**  
><strong>

Partially true. Only Namine and Kairi were still in school. Sora had graduated early and Riku was a year older than us. But Dad didn't need to know that.**  
><strong>

_But I can't promise I won't see Axel after I'm done eating…_**  
><strong>

Amazingly I only had to repeat myself two more times before my dad let me leave. I figured he'd had too much to drink to really care what I did. And I wasn't going to question it. I ran out the door and didn't once look back.

* * *

><p><strong>"<strong>Spill! Now! What happened after we left!"**  
><strong>

I thought it was funny how Namine and Sora were looking for information while Riku and Kairi were looking me over for new injuries.**  
><strong>

**"**He didn't hit you again did he?"**  
><strong>

Kairi's voice was laced with so much concern that I almost started crying. Instead, I shook my head and took another bite of my toast.**  
><strong>

**"**No. He just yelled at me a bit…and then Axel showed up."**  
><strong>

Sora's eyes nearly bugged out of his skull and he dropped his fork so that he could grab my arm.**  
><strong>

**"**Why was Axel at your house?"**  
><strong>

I laughed and shook off Sora's vice grip.**  
><strong>

**"**Calm down. I didn't know he was coming. He just sorta…showed up…He wanted to talk to me…But Dad wouldn't let him. He told him to stay the hell away from me or he'd kill him…"**  
><strong>

Then it was Namine clinging to my arm with a death grip.**  
><strong>

**"**Omigod! What'd Axel say to that!"**  
><strong>

I shook my head and took another bite of toast before answering.**  
><strong>

**"**He didn't. Dad threw him out the door and slammed the door in his face. Then he rounded on me and told me to stay away from him or he'd kill us both."**  
><strong>

Riku raised an eyebrow as he took a sip of his orange juice.**  
><strong>

**"**Heavy on the death threats isn't he?"**  
><strong>

I shrugged and thought it over.**  
><strong>

**"**He's never gone that far before, but I don't think he would…"**  
><strong>

_At least I hoped he wouldn't…_**  
><strong>

**"**So? Are you and Axel done then?"**  
><strong>

Kairi's blue eyes filled with worry and but then her face crumpled in confusion at the giddy smile that formed on my face.**  
><strong>

**"**Well that's what I thought…Until Axel showed up at my window last night a few hours later…"**  
><strong>

I couldn't help but to laugh at my friend's expression. I almost expected them all to exclaim, 'Shut up!'**  
><strong>

**"**What'd he say!"**  
><strong>

I picked up my fork and ate some of my pancakes, leaving them in total suspense, before answering.**  
><strong>

**"**Not much. Just that he didn't care what my dad said."**  
><strong>

I let them absorb that before saying what I had been dying to tell them since it had happened.**  
><strong>

**"**We didn't do much talking after that though…He's a really good kisser."**  
><strong>

I expected a little excitement, but I didn't expect Sora and Namine to grab my arms and shake me, demanding for details.**  
><strong>

**"**Alright, alright! Calm down! You're acting like maniacs."**  
><strong>

**"**Acting? They are maniacs Rox."**  
><strong>

I shook my head and stuck my tongue out at Riku but before I could say something Sora cut me off.**  
><strong>

**"**Yea, well you're dating one of said maniacs so I'd keep your mouth shut."**  
><strong>

Riku rolled his eyes and leaned across the table to give Sora a quick kiss.**  
><strong>

**"**You know I love you."**  
><strong>

Kairi rolled her eyes and pulled the two apart.**  
><strong>

**"**We know! You two are madly in love and can't keep your hands off of each other! Can we focus on Roxas now? Please?"**  
><strong>

I chuckled and rolled my eyes as I finished off my breakfast. I pushed my plate away from me and looked around at my friends.**  
><strong>

**"**Ask away. What do you want to know?"**  
><strong>

They all opened their mouths but I held my hand up to silence them.**  
><strong>

**"**One at a time please."**  
><strong>

They all laughed but Kairi took that as her chance to ask me a question first.**  
><strong>

**"**I for one want to know more about him. All you've ever talked about is how irritating he is, but we know that's not how you really feel."**  
><strong>

All their eyes gleamed and I realized that she was right. I'd never really talked about Axel before.**  
><strong>

So I opened my mouth to do so but my mind drew a blank. What should I tell them?**  
><strong>

When I thought about it, the only things I knew about him were personal. And I didn't think he'd want me to talk about them with people he didn't know.**  
><strong>

**"**There's not much to tell…I don't really know all that much about him."**  
><strong>

I understood their looks of disappointment but there wasn't anything I could do about it. I'd get to know him better the more I spent time with him. Which I planned on doing as soon as I was done here…**  
><strong>

**"**How can you be with him and not know anything about him?"**  
><strong>

I looked over at Namine and started to reassure her, but then something she said started to eat at me.**  
><strong>

**"**I'm not really with him…"**  
><strong>

Sora was taking a drink of his water when I said that and he started choking.**  
><strong>

**"**What do you mean you aren't with him? Aren't you two together now?"**  
><strong>

I looked around them in confusion. I didn't understand what they were all so worked up about.**  
><strong>

**"**I'm not sure…We didn't say anything about it. We kissed, he told me goodnight, and he left. That's it."**  
><strong>

Namine cleared her throat and turned in the booth to face me.**  
><strong>

**"**You like him?"**  
><strong>

I nodded.**  
><strong>

**"**He likes you?"**  
><strong>

I nodded again.**  
><strong>

**"**You two are aware of each other's feelings?"**  
><strong>

**"**Yes."**  
><strong>

**"**You two kissed?"**  
><strong>

I nodded and wished she would get to the point.**  
><strong>

**"**Are you planning on seeing him today?"**  
><strong>

I shrugged and took out my phone. He hadn't texted me since last night but I tried not to let it bug me.**  
><strong>

**"**I'm going to text him later and see if I can come over. I really don't want to go home tonight…"**  
><strong>

Riku waggled his eyebrows at me and I threw one of the small containers of butter at him.**  
><strong>

**"**Not because of that! Freakin pervert…"**  
><strong>

They all laughed and Namine quickly grabbed my attention again.**  
><strong>

**"**Sounds like you two are together to me. Just admit it."**  
><strong>

I groaned and started dragging my fork around my empty plate. **  
><strong>

**"**There's nothing to admit. I just don't want to assume something and it turn out to be something completely different. I'll ask him about it the next time I see him."**  
><strong>

Knowing I hadn't fully pacified them, I pulled out my phone again and typed up a text.**  
><strong>

**Cn I come ovr in a bit…?****  
><strong>

I barely had my phone in my pocket before it started vibrating, alerting me of Axel's quick reply.**  
><strong>

**U don't hve 2 ask Roxas. Drs alwys opn 4 u. C u soon?****  
><strong>

I smiled and quickly replied.**  
><strong>

**Jst makin sure ur hme. B thr in 15.****  
><strong>

I didn't expect a reply after that but as usual he surprised me with a stream of smiley faces.**  
><strong>

_Idiot…_**  
><strong>

But I still sent him a few smiley faces in turn.

* * *

><p>Breakfast, well technically lunch now, went longer than I had expected, so I had to sprint to Axel's place so I could be there when I told him I would be.<strong><br>**

When I got to his apartment, I leaned over and placed my hands on my knees so I could steady myself.**  
><strong>

As soon as my breathing slowed, I mentally shook myself and knocked on the door. He didn't answer and no sound came from the apartment.**  
><strong>

I waited a few more minutes before knocking again. Again, nothing. So I took what Axel had said to heart and let myself inside.**  
><strong>

**"**Axel?"**  
><strong>

I looked around the living room and then towards the kitchen but he wasn't there. **  
><strong>

I didn't know what I'd do if he wasn't home. He probably wouldn't mind if I stayed and waited for him, but for some reason I felt weird about it.**  
><strong>

Then his voice traveled down the hallway and I breathed a sigh of relief.**  
><strong>

**"**I'm takin a shower. I thought I'd be done before you got here. I'll be out in a bit."**  
><strong>

I collapsed onto the couch and failed miserably at not letting my mind picture Axel in the shower.

* * *

><p>While Axel was down the hall taking a shower, I somehow managed to calm myself down. <strong><br>**

But then he came traipsing down the hallway into the living room with basketball shorts hanging loosely on his hips and a snug white t-shirt on.**  
><strong>

He plopped down beside me on the couch and flashed me a breath taking smile. Once I regained a normal breathing pattern everything was fine. But then the idiot took hold of my hand and it started all over again.**  
><strong>

Erratic breathing, escalating heartbeat, loss of coherent thought. I hated the effect he had on me…but at the same time I enjoyed it. Immensely.**  
><strong>

I knew it was stupid to be shy after last night, but I couldn't help it. It seemed like I would always be nervous around Axel. No matter the circumstances.**  
><strong>

Axel's quick squeeze of my hand brought me out of my brief hysteria and I looked up into his concerned gaze.**  
><strong>

**"**Everything alright Roxas?"**  
><strong>

He squeezed my hand again and I took comfort in the warmth of his hand and scooted a little closer to him.**  
><strong>

**"**Y-yea…I'm fine…"**  
><strong>

I shouldn't have been surprised by his chuckle but I was.**  
><strong>

**"**What?"**  
><strong>

He chuckled again before leaning towards me and placing a kiss on my forehead. Completely taken aback by his sudden closeness, I jumped away from him with a small yelp.**  
><strong>

I instantly wished I could take back that reaction when I saw the hurt that pooled in Axel's eyes.**  
><strong>

I stayed where I was for a few moments longer, assessing if he was mad or not, before scooting back to Axel's side.**  
><strong>

I wanted to him to take hold of my hand again but he didn't.**  
><strong>

**"**Roxas…Can I ask you something?"**  
><strong>

His tone took me by surprise and I snapped my eyes up to look at him. For the first time since I had met him, Axel sounded uncertain…and scared?**  
><strong>

Hating that I had caused it, I turned so that I was facing him and tentatively set my hand on his arm.**  
><strong>

**"**You can ask me anything Axel?"**  
><strong>

A slight smile tugged at his lips but it didn't reach his eyes. He was really starting to freak me out.**  
><strong>

**"**I've made it clear…that I…how I feel about you. Many times. And I know that I assumed this…but I'm still not entirely sure how you feel about me…Did you kiss me last night out of pity…or... or confusion? Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed it. No, enjoyed it is an understatement…but I just…I need to know. How do you feel about me?"**  
><strong>

I'm not sure why, but Axel struggling for words was extremely amusing. And if it weren't for my embarrassment at the question, I just might've cracked up laughing.**  
><strong>

But instead I blushed furiously and ducked my head into Axel's chest.**  
><strong>

_Why do I have to say it in so many words…? Can't I just sho_w _him how I feel…?_**  
><strong>

Whether out of relief or an automatic reflex, I'm not entirely sure, Axel put his arm around me. I snuggled closer into his warmth and breathed in his scent before letting out a content sigh.**  
><strong>

I figured my actions would be more than enough to answer Axel's question, but apparently not.**  
><strong>

**"**You didn't answer my question…"**  
><strong>

I tensed up again for a brief moment before mentally admitting defeat. I gripped Axel's shirt tightly in my fist and mumbled into his chest.**  
><strong>

**"**Imaybe…No, Idohave….Argh!Ilikeyouokay!"**  
><strong>

I expected him to show, or utter some kind of relief but neither came.**  
><strong>

Instead he leaned his head down and pressed his lips to the shell of my ear before his breath ghosted over my cheek.**  
><strong>

**"**I didn't catch that…"**  
><strong>

My breath hitched as his words tickled the lobe of my ear and I let out a jumble of mumbled syllables.**  
><strong>

**"**Roxas…I didn't hear your answer?"**  
><strong>

As soon as he started to nibble on my ear lobe, my brain, and a good majority of my body, turned to mush.**  
><strong>

But I still somehow managed to gasp out the answer he was searching for.**  
><strong>

**"**I…I like you…Axel…"**  
><strong>

My own voice took me by surprise. It came out as a suppressed moan and was laced with need and anticipation.**  
><strong>

A low chuckle resonated in Axel's throat and he pushed me back into arm of the couch and positioned himself over me.**  
><strong>

A small voice in my head told me that I should be slightly alarmed, but I ignored it. I was too caught up in the moment.**  
><strong>

Axel placed a gentle kiss on my neck, before gliding his tongue up along the soft, sensitive flesh.**  
><strong>

My breathing took on an alarming pace, and just as I thought it couldn't get any better, it did. His tongue moved agonizingly slow, before he started to nip and suck at the spot his mouth was latched onto.**  
><strong>

I let out mewls and gasps before a low moan escaped my lips.**  
><strong>

As if those sounds weren't humiliating enough, I let out a whine of protest when his lips left my skin.**  
><strong>

My eyes snapped open and I started to demand why he stopped, but his amused smile silenced me.**  
><strong>

**"**Nice of you to finally admit it. I like you too Roxie."**  
><strong>

I already knew how he felt but he had never said it like that before. His voice resonated with so much conviction that there was no room to doubt.**  
><strong>

A smile tugged at my lips but then I processed that he had, once again, ignored my protests and called me Roxie.**  
><strong>

**"**How many tim—"**  
><strong>

My irritation disappeared entirely when Axel covered my mouth with his own. Out of habit, I started to pull away but then he snaked his arms under and around my torso and I melted into him as he pulled me as close to him as he possibly could.**  
><strong>

It still wasn't enough for me though. I pushed whole-heartedly into the kiss, desperate to feel more of him. He responded with just as much urgency and it didn't take me long to be gasping for air.**  
><strong>

After breathing in, Axel slid his tongue into my still open mouth. I was taken by surprise, but I didn't have the nerve, or desire to stop him. **  
><strong>

I briefly hesitated before wrapping my arms around his neck. I clung to him as if my life depended on it. I'd be lying if I said that I've never kissed before, but I sure as hell have never been kissed like this.**  
><strong>

My lungs screamed for air once again, but I had no desire to stop kissing Axel. But the lack o fair became too much and we reluctantly disconnected our lips, letting them remain breaths apart.**  
><strong>

My eyelids flitted open to stare up into blazing emerald eyes.**  
><strong>

**"**God Roxas…you're so hot…"**  
><strong>

I blushed then, at both his gaze and his statement.**  
><strong>

He rested his hand on my hip as he continued to whisper into my ear. I gulped nervously and squeezed my eyes shut.**  
><strong>

**"**Idiot…you don't have to lie to me…"**  
><strong>

He chuckled and nuzzled my neck as he planted a few more kisses there before pulling back up to smile down at me as I shivered at his touch.**  
><strong>

**"**I'll never lie to you Roxas…"**  
><strong>

Once again, Axel spoke with so much conviction that it almost blew me away.**  
><strong>

We both seemed to freeze as we gazed at one another. Pure sapphire on shimmering emerald. Time just seemed to stop, until I nodded and leaned up to place a quick kiss on his neck and then his lips.**  
><strong>

I thought I heard him chuckle again but I couldn't be sure. My mind went blank when the red head above me started to ravish my lips again.**  
><strong>

They were probably swollen by this point but I didn't really care. His fingers slid under the hem of my shirt and he started to trace lazy circles on my skin.**  
><strong>

I shuddered at his touch and pulled my fingers through his hair to pull myself closer to him. I expected it to be rough in texture but it was incredibly soft.**  
><strong>

I'm not sure how long we lay there kissing each other, but neither of us seemed to have any desire to stop. **  
><strong>

But then my confidence evaporated. Axel's hand curled around the edge of my shirt and he started to slowly pull it upwards while the thumb of his other hand hooked into the waistband of my jeans.**  
><strong>

I gasped and pulled my lips away from his.**  
><strong>

**"**S-stop…"**  
><strong>

I tried to pull away from him, but his hold on me wouldn't let me budge.**  
><strong>

He chuckled and kissed my forehead.**  
><strong>

**"**Why? You seem to be enjoying this."**  
><strong>

His mouth latched onto my neck again and I had no control of the way my hips bucked into him.**  
><strong>

I found myself giving into him, and I was perfectly oka—**  
><strong>

**"**_How can you be with him and not know anything about him?"_**  
><strong>

I'm not sure why my mind drifted to that conversation but it's what gave me the resolve to push Axel off of me.**  
><strong>

**"**I'm serious Axel…Stop!"**  
><strong>

And he did. His body froze and he pushed off of me a bit. But he was still hovering over me.**  
><strong>

He looked into my eyes with a questioning look. He must've been convinced that I was serious because he pushed himself off of me entirely with a disappointed sigh.**  
><strong>

**"**I'm sorry Roxas…"**  
><strong>

I let my eyes slide shut and waited for my breathing to go back to normal before pushing myself up into a sitting position.**  
><strong>I retreated into the corner of the couch and pulled my legs to my chest.**  
><strong>

Now that I was able to think clearly there were so many things wrong with this situation.**  
><strong>

One, my friends were right. I really didn't know anything about Axel.**  
><strong>

Two, I was still reluctant to let him see all the scars and wounds that were scattered all over my body. **  
><strong>

Three, with just a few kisses and touches and sweet words I was ready to give myself to Axel entirely. And that scared me more than anything.**  
><strong>

**"**Did I do something wrong? Or was it just too fast?"**  
><strong>

I looked up into Axel's face and was surprised by the all the different emotions I saw swimming in his eyes.**  
><strong>

I gave him a reassuring smile before closing my eyes again and slowly counted to 10.**  
><strong>

I wanted to be calm and not sound completely turned on when I explained to him why I told him to stop.**  
><strong>

**"**Just a little too fast yea…but no, you didn't really do anything wrong."**  
><strong>

I waited for him to say something but a cloud of silence seemed to engulf him. So of course I started to panic.**  
><strong>

**"**A-Are you mad…?"**  
><strong>

He let out an amused sigh as he slid closer to me. He ruffled my hair and gently pecked my lips.**  
><strong>

**"**I'm not mad at you. I don't think I ever could be. I'm mad at myself…We'll take this completely at your pace. There's no rush. We have a lot of time for us."**  
><strong>

We both smiled at each other and I started to feel comfortable again. But when he leaned into kiss me again I turned my head away from him.**  
><strong>

**"**That's not the only thing that was bothering you was it?"**  
><strong>

I took in a deep breath and squeezed my eyes shut as I shook my head.**  
><strong>

**"**No…It wasn't…"**  
><strong>

Axel shifted position so that he was sitting cross legged in front of me.**  
><strong>

**"**What is it Roxas? Talk to me…"**  
><strong>

I took another steadying breath as I hesitantly reached for his hand. He smiled as he squeezed my hand and I took comfort in his presence.**  
><strong>

**"**I don't know you Axel…"**  
><strong>

I expected him to scoff or roll his eyes but instead his face crumpled in confusion.**  
><strong>

**"**You do know me Roxas…I don't understand."**  
><strong>

I sighed and thought of a better way to word my hesitance.**  
><strong>

**"**I know you but I don't know anything _about _you. You know plenty about me, but I know nothing about you. I was with my friends earlier and they asked about you but I didn't have anything to tell them. The only thing I know about you is that you ran away and your parents are dead…That seemed too personal to tell them Axel…I want to be able to talk about my bo—about you to my friends."**  
><strong>

I started to call him my boyfriend but I still wasn't sure what we were to each other so I quickly corrected myself.**  
><strong>

**"**I don't know that much about you…"**  
><strong>

The only way to know for sure was to test him. So I started rattling off random questions about myself.**  
><strong>

**"**When's my birthday?"**  
><strong>

It had been a while since I told him so I figured he'd have forgotten by now.**  
><strong>

**"**April 25th."**  
><strong>

_He just has a good memory…Let's go for something I haven't told him…_**  
><strong>

**"**What am I afraid of…?"**  
><strong>

It was a really personal question. Not even Sora knew the answer to that so there was no way Axel could possibly know that I couldn't stand the thought of—**  
><strong>

**"**Being alone. That's why you won't leave your dad…"**  
><strong>

I blinked at him a few times before shaking my head. Just because I didn't voice it, didn't mean it wasn't obvious.**  
><strong>

_Something you can't just guess by getting to know me…_**  
><strong>

**"**Favorite color?"**  
><strong>

Axel chuckled and I glared at him.**  
><strong>

**"**Sorry…I'd say…red. Am I right?"**  
><strong>

I wanted to argue and say that it had recently changed to emerald green but I couldn't deny the way my eyes flitted up to his red locks.**  
><strong>

**"**Lucky guess…"**  
><strong>

And so I continued to ask him questions about myself, and he continued to answer almost all of them correctly. It seriously ticked me off that he only answered 2 wrong. And they weren't even wrong. He openly admitted that he didn't know. And they were such out there questions that I didn't even know the answers myself.**  
><strong>

**"**Alright, alright! I think we've proven my point. You know me way more than I know you. It's not fair."**  
><strong>

I crossed my arms and pouted. Pathetic, I know but it was an automatic reflex when I was irritated.**  
><strong>

**"**Just to be clear, you're mad because I know a lot about you?"**  
><strong>

No. That wasn't the issue. The fact that someone knew me almost as well as I knew myself was oddly satisfying. It's just—**  
><strong>

**"**No, I just hate that I don't know you as well. I mean aren't relationships supposed to be on somewhat equal terms? Speaking of which, what the hell is this?"**  
><strong>

I gestured to the two of us and continued on with my rant.**  
><strong>

**"**I mean are we just messing around? Are you going to dump me as soon as you get bored? Are we together? And if so what does it mean? I'm so fucking confused!"**  
><strong>

All of sudden he was cracking up and I aimed a kick at his legs.**  
><strong>

**"**This is so not funny! This is all your fault! You ass—" **  
><strong>

Axel grabbed my ankle and then leaned forward to silence me with a kiss.**  
><strong>

**"**Alright, I'm sorry for being so irritating but you are just so cute when you're angry."**  
><strong>

I glared at him and started to argue but then his gaze softened and I was taken aback by the pure emotion I saw there.**  
><strong>

**"**What do you want this to be Roxas?"**  
><strong>

I was taken aback by that question. I got to choose…? I'd never had much choice in my life. The answer was easy enough—**  
><strong>

**"**I just want to be with you Axel…I don't care how….I just want…need you in my life."**  
><strong>

I was surprised by the raw honesty in my voice. But there was no point in denying my feelings for him.**  
><strong>

I expected him to make a similar declaration but it wasn't necessary. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he felt the same way.**  
><strong>

**"**What do you want to know Roxas? I'll answer all your questions."**  
><strong>

This was what I was searching for right? The chance to ask him all my questions? But now that he was an open book to me no questions came to the tip of my tongue. So I went with the same ones I asked him about me.**  
><strong>

**"**When's your birthday?"**  
><strong>

He rolled his eyes and chuckled before he reclined into the opposite arm of the couch. Then he smiled and held his arms out to me.**  
><strong>

I balked, unsure of what he was asking of me.**  
><strong>

**"**It sounds like we're going to be here for a while. Why don't we get comfortable?"**  
><strong>

I thought his words over, assessed myself, and stared at him silently until I couldn't deny his tempting offer any longer.**  
><strong>

I pushed myself towards him and curled into his side. He waited for me to get comfortable before he draped his arm around my waist.**  
><strong>

**"**August 8th. I believe your next question was biggest fear?"**  
><strong>

I blushed and nodded when he guessed what I was doing.**  
><strong>

**"**Pretty much the same as yours. I…I never want to lose someone I love, ever again…"**  
><strong>

I gave a little squirm when he mentioned the word love, but then I realized he wasn't talking about me. Or anyone I knew for that matter. **  
><strong>

**"**You're parents…?"**  
><strong>

He gripped me tighter and I he burrowed his head into my hair before letting out a barely audible whisper.**  
><strong>

**"**Yes…"**  
><strong>

It got really quiet as I thought of something I could possibly say to that. 'Sorry' just didn't seem like it would cut it.**  
><strong>

**"**The color of your eyes…"**  
><strong>

I barely heard what he said I was so encompassed in my own thoughts.**  
><strong>

**"**Huh?"**  
><strong>

He kissed the top of my head as he started tracing his fingers on my side.**  
><strong>

**"**The color of your eyes is my favorite color."**  
><strong>

I looked up at him in disbelief.**  
><strong>

**"**I used to hate blue. It always seemed like such a cold color. But despite all the bullshit you go through yours are full of warmth…"**  
><strong>

I'm not sure how he did it. If I even thought of saying something like that I would've died of embarrassment.**  
><strong>

And so it continued. I asked him all kinds of questions. Meaningless ones and others that had answers I never would've expected.**  
><strong>

I figured out that he liked to read, but he only did it in the privacy of his room because his friends nagged him about it.**  
><strong>

He talked on and on about his friends, and to my displeasure Larxene was the one he knew the longest. And had the most to be said about.**  
><strong>

I don't think he realized how much he had talked about her until he caught the jealous, totally humiliating!, expression on my face.

So he chuckled and said some nonsense about me being the only one for him and started prattling on about something else.**  
><strong>

He was allergic to cats and loved dogs. He was a terrible cook so most of his money went towards take out.**  
><strong>

He desperately wanted to buy a car of his own but his job didn't pay him nearly enough.**  
><strong>

I regretted asking him about his past relationships cause it turned out he had had quite a few of them.**  
><strong>

After what seemed like hours he ran out of things to say about himself. Then a question that had been bugging me for awhile slipped past my lips.**  
><strong>

**"**Axel…Why exactly did you run away?"**  
><strong>

I knew it was a terribly personal question but he had said I could ask him anything. But his grip tightened on me past comfort and then he slid away from me and was sitting up and bowing his head.**  
><strong>

I propped myself up on my elbow and looked at him curiously.**  
><strong>

**"**Axel…?"**  
><strong>

I reached out and placed my hand on his shoulder but he shook it off.**  
><strong>

**"**I don't want to talk about it…"**  
><strong>

I knew I should've respected that but I pushed him anyways.**  
><strong>

**"**I thought you said I could ask you anything…?"**  
><strong>

His back stiffened and he glared at me over his shoulder.**  
><strong>

**"**I did but I didn't think you'd ask me that. I'm not comfortable talking about it!"**  
><strong>

I tried to remind myself that he wasn't really angry at me…or at least I hoped he wasn't.**  
><strong>

**"**I'm not comfortable talking about my mom and dad with anyone but you're the exception…Can't I be yours?"**  
><strong>

His glare faded and I thought that I had gotten through to him but then he shook his head and pushed himself off of the couch.**  
><strong>

**"**No! I'm not comfortable talking about it with anyone! Only—I just can't talk about it, okay?"**  
><strong>

He started running his fingers through his hair. Thankfully he still stayed in the room. I think he wanted me to drop the subject but

I didn't. I was going to but then he started to say something but didn't finish.**  
><strong>

**"**You've talked about it with Larxene, haven't you…?"**  
><strong>

He flinched and then I turned my face away from him cause I could feel them starting to water.**  
><strong>

**"**This isn't about Larxene."**  
><strong>

I shook my head and wiped away the tears that threatened to leak out.

"No, it's about us and the fact that you won't talk to me about something even though I've told you every last thing about myself…"

I knew I was going about this the wrong way, but I didn't know what else to do. It had been so long since my last relationship and it barely counted as one anyways.

"Just drop it Roxas. It's none of your business!"

He threw one last glare my way before retreating to his bedroom and slamming the door shut. Leaving me alone and confused on his couch.

I automatically started to head after Axel, but then I thought better of it. Being in a different room wasn't going to change his mind.

I'd give him some time and space and hope that we would work something out. I couldn't lose him now. Not after all the crap and bullshit we went through to get here.

My eyes flitted over to his kitchen and noticed how filthy it was. Dishes stacked up on all the counters. Trash overflowing. Every surface had some kind of questionable substance on it.

_Might as well…_

I pushed my sleeves up and set to work cleaning his kitchen.

* * *

><p>When I was done with it, the kitchen was almost unrecognizable. I was starving when I was finished, but there really wasn't much to cook so I gave up on that idea.<p>

I chanced a look down the hallway and considered going back to his room to talk to him but I chickened out again.

So I walked back over to the couch. That's when I realized how grimy and disgusting I felt after cleaning.

So I grabbed my bag and walked into the bathroom, hoping that Axel wouldn't mind if I used his shower. And I swore to myself that after I was done showering I would go and talk to Axel.

* * *

><p>I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. Then I rummaged through my bag in search of my toothbrush.<p>

When I found it I turned to the sink only to find that he was out of toothpaste.

_How the hell does live! That's it! I'm going shopping for him in the morning!_

I made do with swishing some mouthwash around and popping a mint into my mouth.

I pulled out sweats and red t-shirt and tugged them on. Then I started toweling my hair dry. I spent 30 minutes getting it perfectly dry and making sure that each lock of hair was laying just right.

Then I stared around the room, looking for something else to distract me. There was nothing. So I heaved a sigh and walked out of the bathroom and down the hall towards Axel's bedroom.

It had been close to 2 hours since Axel had stormed away from me, but I was still scared to face him…

What if he told me to go away? Or said that being with me was a mistake and never wanted to see me again? Or…

"I know you're out there Roxas. You can come in."

I jumped at the sudden sound of Axel's voice. He sounded calm and like his usual self, so I reached my hand out and turned the door knob.

I stepped into his bedroom and stared at him. He was lying on his bed staring straight back at me.

The room was quiet until we both suddenly broke the silence.

"I'm sorry that I—"

"I shouldn't have acted—"

We both stopped talking at the same time and offered each other an apologetic smile.

Axel shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair before pushing himself into a sitting position and opening his arms for me.

I all but ran to him and snuggled myself into his chest. It was funny how just being in his arms made everything else not matter. It was as if the world had disappeared and the only thing left were me and him.

He fingers plucked at a strand of my hair and I heard him breathe in.

"You smell weird…"

I frowned and tried to pull up to look at him but he wouldn't let me move.

"I took a shower…I didn't think you'd mind."

He chuckled and wrapped his arms around me tighter.

"I don't mind. You just don't smell like you anymore. I like how _you _smell Roxas. You're gonna have to bring some of your stuff to keep here…"

I heard the uncertainty in his voice and I knew why. That was pretty close to living here and we both knew that wasn't really a possibility. But I decided not to say anything and voiced my complaint.

"You know you're out of toothpaste right? And you barely have any food? We're gonna have to fix that."

He chuckled and gently smacked the back of my head.

"You sound like my mom…"

Both of us held our breaths after that statement.

I tried to think of a way to break the silence but before I could Axel rolled over onto his side so that we were lying face to face.

"I want you to know that this is really hard for me to talk about. It has nothing to do with you. Larxene only knows about it because she was around me when it was going on. I want you to know about me too Roxas—"

I couldn't stand the tortured expression on his face so I propped myself up on my elbow and shook my head at him.

"Don't force yourself Axel. When you're comfortable talking to me about it, I'll be here to listen. I promise."

He smiled sadly at me before leaning forward to capture my lips with his. I'm not sure why, but I assumed that eventually kissing Axel would lose its novelty. Instead each kiss said something different, held new meanings to me, and made me feel separate emotions.

When we surfaced for air, heavy pants filled the bedroom and I desperately tried to ignore the ache that was growing inside of me.

"Are you staying over tonight…?"

I didn't need time to think. When I asked him if I could come over I'd had no intention of going back home tonight.

I nodded and another make-out session ensued.

"Will you sleep here tonight…?"

My skin felt like it was on fire when he began licking and sucking at my neck again. But then I froze when his question registered in my mind.

"Axel…No. I can't…Not yet."

I hated to disappoint him but he had told me we could take this at my pace.

He chuckled and placed chaste, gentle pecks on my lips.

"Don't worry Roxas. I won't do anything you don't want me to do. I just don't want to let go of you…I want to sleep with you in my arms."

I blushed furiously when he said that to me and I pulled away from him.

"Is it really okay with you…? That I don't want to do anything…? Yet…"

He pushed himself up so that he was sitting across from me and shook his head.

"No babe. I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to. But age difference aside, you're not ready and I'm not going to push you."

The giant mutated butterflies were back in my stomach when he called me babe, but then he remarked on our age difference and I felt the need to defend myself.

"I'll be 18 in a month and a half…"

He smirked and I glared at him.

"Believe me, I'm all too aware of that."

That made a smile tug at my lips, but I still wanted to make sure that everything was okay between us.

"So you don't want me to leave…? I could sleep on the couch…Or go home…"**  
><strong>

They were the last things I wanted to do, but making Axel uncomfortable was also at the top of that list.**  
><strong>

He smirked and shook his head.**  
><strong>

**"**Nope. You've grown on me. I like you Roxas…More than I think you realize."**  
><strong>

All logical thoughts were wiped from my brain with that simple sentence.**  
><strong>

What was I supposed to say to that? He was obviously aiming to get a reaction out of me. And I wasn't going to let him know just how happy I was that I could still stay with him.**  
><strong>

If he knew just how afraid I was of going home sometimes, he'd never let me leave. I'd be perfectly okay with that if I didn't know that my dad would come looking for me and after his threat yesterday…**  
><strong>

I realized I had gotten lost in thought and that Axel was waiting for me to say something.**  
><strong>

**"**I can't imagine why you're so interested…"**  
><strong>

He softly shook his head and rolled his eyes.**  
><strong>

**"**Interested? You fascinate me Roxas."**  
><strong>

He smiled and my pulse accelerated.**  
><strong>

I tried to inject some measure of self-composure into my voice.**  
><strong>

**"**Well…thanks Axel."**  
><strong>

He just laughed as he pulled me into an embrace.**  
><strong>

**"**No problem Roxie."**  
><strong>

I didn't even bother correcting him as I curled into his side. It surprised me how well we fit together. Almost like we were 2 puzzle pieces designed for each other.**  
><strong>

My eyelids started to droop and a yawn traveled its way up my throat. But it was only 8. Way too early for me to go to bed.**  
><strong>

**"**Tired?"**  
><strong>

I stubbornly shook my head and forced myself to stay awake.**  
><strong>

**"**Not at all."**  
><strong>

He chuckled and lifted my chin with his hand.**  
><strong>

Axel's lips ghosted over my forehead, down my nose and stopped at my lips where he gently pried them open and gave me a slow, sensual kiss.**  
><strong>

My body acted automatically and I started to eagerly return the kiss but then another yawn escaped my lips and Axel pulled my head to his chest with a chuckle.**  
><strong>

**"**Go to sleep Roxas."**  
><strong>

The last thing I remember was Axel whispering into my ear as he drew small circles into the exposed skin of my back. Tiredness won out over my stubbornness and before I knew it, a haze of sleep swallowed me.

* * *

><p><strong>First of all, *GLOMPS* Just want you guys to know how fucking amazing you are! XDD The best readers a girl could have. Love you guys! Cookies and hugs for all of you. I still can't believe how much positive feedback I'm getting. I still think my writing's a piece f crap sometimes… But your reviews chase those doubts away and plaster a smile on my face.<strong>

**Second, I'm totally obsessing over Supernatural all over again. I mean come one, the shows fucking amazing! Can you really blame me? No, no you can't. *nods head* And since it's Supernatural I'm obsessing over, I'm also obsessing over Destiel. HOTTEST COUPLE EVER! I mean, put those 2 men in a scene together, doesn't matter the circumstances, I'm practically drooling and imagining them doing VERY NAUGHTY things to each other. I swear, they need to hurry up and bring Cas back. And as soon as they do, Sam needs to lokc Dean and Cas into a room together so they can get their fuck on…That was a little much…Wasn't it? Oh well.**

**Thirdly, I have a few questions for you guys.**

**How do you feel about the lengths of the last 2 chapters? Too long? Or do you like them like that?**

**Favorite chapter/part/line of the story so far? Just out of curiosity.**

**And lastly, what do you guys want me to next? Cornered is now where near finished, seeing as how I have no idea how I'm going to end it, but still I like to plan ahead. So here are the choices.**

**1) ****Another AkuRoku fic. **

**2) ****A SasuNaru fic**

**3) ****A Destiel fic**

** I don't have plots picked out any of those, but I do have a semblance of a plot in my head that could work for all three couples. **

**Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter ^^**


	18. Nightmares and Hickeys

Cornered 18

**Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me.**

**So...Yea, I'm not dead. Lol Sorry for going so long without an update -_- I mean the last time was what, March 3rd? SO FREAKIN LONG! But yea I was havin personal issues, school issues and just had time or desire to write. And then when I started writing again me and my beta were havin technical issues with communication. And yea, but the chapters done and I bet you guys aren't even reading this cause you just wanna get on with the story which I competley understand.**

**Oh, and you know how on the first chapter I was all like "I don't do sex scenes period!" Yea, scratch and abort that cause my beta hijacked this chapter and wrote some AkuRoku smexy time that I totally approve of. **

**AkuRoku~~**

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><p>The nightmare came to an abrupt end and my eyes snapped open with a quick intake of breath. My body starting trembling violently and I instinctively shuffled closer into Axel's warmth.<p>

I didn't want him to see me like this though. So miserably pathetic and completely vulnerable. So I slowly pulled away from him so as not to wake him, and brought my knees up so that I could hide my face and just let the tears fall.

I hated my subconscious. How dare it shatter my complete bliss with such horror? I had grown accustom to my usual nightmare. To the point where it rarely scared me anymore. It was more irritating than anything else.

But the one I just had was so new, so fresh, so…so…

_Real…_

My dream probably wouldn't have scared anyone else though. There was really nothing to it. Just me, sitting down and staring at a headstone. I still wasn't sure who it belonged to though. The name constantly changed between my dad, myself, my friends, and Axel.

It seemed I still couldn't let go of the fear of losing any of them. The fear of being completely and utterly alone in this world.

My sobbing must've woken Axel, because he shifted next to me. He sat up and wound his arms around my waist and rested his head on my shoulder.

If it was anybody else I probably would've pushed them away, but instead I accepted the comforting gesture.

"Roxas…Calm down babe."

He whispered soothingly in my ear, but it had little effect. I just couldn't shake the terror that was still clinging to me as an aftermath of the dream.

I tried to explain that to him but all I did was choke out sobs and garbled my words.

Feeling completely ashamed of my behavior I tried to pull away from Axel, but instead he pulled me back so that I was sitting in his lap and leaning into his embrace.

"Relax…Relax…"

His head was resting on my shoulder again, and his hair tickled my cheeks. I barely noticed. I was trying to slow down my sobbing and regulate my breathing by matching it with Axel's.

His hold tightened on me and his thumb started moving up and down under my shirt in a soothing manner. Coaxing me to calm down.

Sobs continued to pour out of me at an unrelenting pace. My chest and throat felt like they were on fire but I just couldn't stop.

Minutes or hours passed before my breathing started to slightly slow back into a normal pace. I relaxed into Axel some more and clasped his hands in mine with a death grip. I needed Axel. He was what was keeping me afloat, keeping me breathing, keeping me holding on.

I tightened my grip on him again and he nuzzled his face into my neck and planted a few quick pecks there.

I had just woken up yet I felt totally drained and was ready to go back to bed.

I started to pull away from him again, but he didn't have to pull me back this time. Instead, I turned to face him and buried my head into his chest as I wrapped my arms around him.

He did the same and buried his face into my hair. He raised his voice to just above a whisper so that I could hear him.

"You okay?"

His warm breath rustled my hair and it ghosted down over my cheek. It so wasn't the right reaction but I still felt a blush rising under my cheeks.

"I'm so fucked up Axel…"

I'm not sure how he did it, but somehow Axel managed to pull us closer together than we already were before.

He didn't ask anything else, but I still found words spilling out of my mouth. Things I'd always thought and felt, but had never dared to voice aloud.

How after years of hearing it from my dad, I really did blame myself for my mom's death. How some small part of me thinks that I do deserve the way he treats me. How I've come to terms with the fact that he'll never change. Just how scary I find the thought of being alone. And then I start telling him about my reoccurring nightmares, how it changed the night he came to my window, and the one that had woke me up in a panic.

My pulse became erratic again and I started taking quick shallow breaths. Axel's hold on me tightened and he started frantically whispering sweet, reassuring words into my ear.

I grabbed hold of my emotions, and eventually my breathing was steady again.

A calm silence enveloped us until I broke it by voicing something I'd never had the nerve to think about.

"I never should've been born Axe…"

So many terrible things could've been avoided if I had never been born. And really, it's not like anyone would truly miss me. I am nothing. I am completely insignificant to the world around me.

I squeaked in fear when Axel's hold on me turned from comforting to painful.

"Don't you _ever_ say something like that again Roxas!"

His voice came out as a guttural growl that had me trembling.

My voice shook and cracked as I stubbornly responded.

"But it's tru—"

"Don't you dare say it's true! There's nothing true about it Roxas!"

I couldn't argue the facts though.

"My mom would still be alive…My dad wouldn't be sick…My friends wouldn't be terrified for me…You wouldn't be hurt…"

I'm not even sure if Axel heard half of what I said. I was talking in a breathy whisper. My eyes were glued to his damaged knuckles from punching the side of my house and I gently ran my thumb along them before bringing his hand to my lips and kissing each one.

He let out a patient sigh and started rubbing my back again. The soothing effect instantly took hold and I relaxed into his chest once again.

"Roxas, Roxas, Roxas…"

He pulled me with him as he collapsed back onto the bed. I instantly snuggled into him and we were back to lying the way we were before I woke up.

"You have no way of knowing if you're mom would still be alive babe. From the way you've talked about it, sounds like she was sick way before you were born. It wasn't your fault. Her brain just wasn't working right. You're dad's behavior is not your fault. It's completely unjustified, but it's his way of dealing. Trust me, if you'd let me I'd keep you here and never let you go back."

To emphasize his point, he tightened his grip on me before kissing my forehead.

Sora and Riku had told me all of this before, but it somehow sounded different coming from Axel. I found myself almost believing it.

"Your friends love you, that's why they worry. I'm a hundred percent sure they don't feel inconvenienced at all."

He laced his fingers with mine and gave my hand a quick squeeze that I returned.

"And as for me…Well you know how I feel about you Roxas. I'd take any amount of pain if that meant that you never had to get hurt again…"

His words took my breath away. I wanted to believe him. I really did. But I just couldn't wrap my head around it. How could someone like me deserve that kind of devotion from someone like Axel? It didn't make sense.

But instead of arguing with him, I voiced something that almost made me die from embarrassment.

"Idiot…You being hurt would hurt me even more…"

My cheeks were burning after those words left me and I buried my head into his chest and started mumbling nonsense in the hopes of distracting him.

He chuckled and I slapped him on the chest to shut him up.

"S'not funny…"

He let out another chuckle and he started tracing light patterns on my back through my shirt.

"Axe…Can I tell you something really personal…?"

I'm not sure what had gotten into me. I'd always been reluctant to share personal things with anybody. I still have a hard time talking about things with Sora. Yet, here I was telling Axel everything in a short span of time.

"Hmm? You can tell me anything babe."

He sounded distracted but I knew he was paying strict attention to everything I said.

"Well…My mom wrote this letter to me before she killed herself. Dad hid it from me but I found it a few years ago, and I read it every night before I go to bed…That's why I freaked out when I left my book bag at the library…I thought I might lose it…And…"

I felt my lip tremble like it always did when I talked or even thought about her. So I clamped my mouth shut and reigned in my emotions.

"Roxas? And what?"

I frantically shook my head no and pulled away from him so I could sit up. He tried to keep me next to him at first, but then he reluctantly let me go.

"Nothing…It's nothing. Forget about it."

I had been about to tell him that I used think up this alternate reality where Mom's still alive and Dad wasn't some bloodlust demon that wanted to start the next world war.

But recently that's stopped because if none of that had happened; I might not have met my friends. And I most definitely wouldn't have met Axel. And right now, I couldn't imagine my life without him in it.

Admitting that to myself was easy enough, but no way in hell was I going to tell Axel that. It was beyond humiliating…

I heard a soft chuckle and immediately turned suspiciously to Axel, knowing that once again, he was laughing at me.

"What's so funny?"

He shook his head, his red locks shifting slightly as he followed me up into a sitting position.

"You were making a cute face, is all."

I frowned, but this seemed to set off Axel's chuckles more fiercely as he wrapped his arms around my waist again.

"Have I ever told you how cute you are when you're confused?"

My frown deepened as I processed what he had said

"First I'm cute when I'm angry, now I'm cute when I'm confused?"

He shrugged and nuzzled into my neck.

"What can I say? You're just you."

I raised an eyebrow in disbelief, not minding how close we were despite the blush that spread across my cheeks.

"So I'm cute?"

Axel chuckled again and I found myself fighting my blush even harder.

"Among other things."

A smile smoothed across my face and as the calm moment lengthened, I found my mind drifting off to sleep. And to my nightmare as well.

Remembering the feeling of loss and isolation, I tensed again as my heart rate increased. And Axel was there the entire time, tightening his hold around my waist and offering support.

"Roxie…"

_How many times do I have to tell him…_

"…yea…?"

"I…I can no longer imagine my life without you in it…"

My breath caught at the familiar words that I was trying so hard to keep from saying to him, but he continued on. He was determined to finish.

"And I don't want to have to. Promise me…never say you shouldn't have been born again…Never."

I was shocked into silence by the desperation in Axel's voice.

I mean…I just couldn't begin to fathom why he cared so much. I was just me…No one special…just a fucked up kid that wandered into his life…and yet my existence really mattered to him for some reason…

I couldn't think of a way to respond to him, so I just sat there. Blinking at him and not saying anything like the stupid idiot I was.

It was a simple promise to make really…but for some reason the words wouldn't leave my lips. They felt like a lie in my head, and I refused to lie to Axel. Not after all the lies I'd told him that prolonged us from being together. And besides, he'd catch me in the lie. There was no point.

So I just pulled away from him gently, rolling my eyes as I did.

"Don't worry Axel…I'm okay…Well I'm not…But I will be okay."

We stared at each other after I said that, and I saw the doubt and disbelief slowly cloud his emerald orbs. So I took a deep breath and plastered a smile on my face.

I did this all the time when I would be hanging out with my friends. I'd plaster a fake smile on my face to reassure them. And it worked a majority of the time.

But I didn't have to worry about that with Axel. The smile I put on my face was completely genuine. It was just a result of being around Axel. Just looking at him and being around him made me want to smile like an idiot.

For a brief moment Axel was taken by surprise. But then the corner of his lips turned up into _his_ smile. The one that always turned my brain to mush and set butterflies loose inside me.

And now the one that made me question why I fought the obvious connection between the two of us so fiercely…

I felt my smile start to falter as that thought crossed my mind. Sure I had been trying to protect myself…but really all I'd done is hurt us both in the process…

_I really was an idiot I suppose…_

Not wanting to make Axel worry about me anymore than he already did, I leaned forward and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

I could tell he was taken off guard by my sudden initiative, and I took that as my chance. I let my lips linger on his for a few more seconds before pulling away and hopping up off of his bed.

His hands reached for me as I did so, but I reluctantly stepped out of his reach with a small grin.

"Bathroom. I'll be right back."

He chuckled and placed his hands in his lap as if he was trying to show he could behave.

"You better…I'm not the most patient person Roxas…"

His voice came out playful and teasing though his words could easily be taken as a threat. And he threw a wink my way when he was done that sent blood to my cheeks.

So I quickly turned around and headed out of his room and towards the hall, before he saw me blush and decided to call me cute again.

I stepped into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I had left for the bathroom to give me time to get a hold of myself and my emotions. I was tired of the weeping Roxas Axel always seemed to see.

Why would he want a boyfriend that cries all the time…?

It's probably annoying, and the last thing I want to do is annoy him….Or give him any reason to get tired of me and leave…

I felt my eyes start to burn, but I refused to let more tears fall. I pushed away from the door and towards the bathroom sink. I turned the tap on and let the cold water run over my hands, before bringing them up and splashing water on my face.

I shut my eyes and enjoyed the cool sensation, before rubbing the water away and opening my eyes. As I waited for my vision to swim back into focus, I looked up into the mirror; a blurry blob of yellow and blue staring back at me.

And then the blob came into focus…And as I stared at myself…I was filled with revulsion…Like I always was…

I started to nitpick at everything I hated about myself as usual…until my eyes were drawn to a red splotch on my neck peeking out from under the neckline of my shirt.

I waited for the cause of it to pop into my head but I couldn't think of anything. So I pulled my shirt off and leaned towards the mirror to get a closer look, and a deep blush traveled over my cheeks as I realized what they were.

There were two tiny hickeys on the left side of my neck, and slightly bigger one on the right side. I clapped my hands to my neck and started rubbing as if doing that would make the embarrassing marks go away.

A frustrated sigh escaped my lips as I dropped my hands, giving up on my fruitless attempt. They would eventually fade away on their own…

So instead of trying to erase them, I got angry. An irrational, and very late response, but I was angry…

I barely recalled unlocking and opening the bathroom door, or even stomping down the hallway towards Axel's bedroom…but next thing I knew, I was standing in his doorway; glaring at him.

And it frustrated me even more that he didn't seem concerned. Instead his eyes raked over me, and that was when I realized I hadn't put my shirt back on.

"Very nice."

A slight purr entered Axel's voice that I had never heard before. It made me blush and feel slightly self- conscious…

I shook that feeling away and continued to glare at him, crossing my arms across my chest.

"Oh shut up…What the hell is wrong with you!"

I'm not sure why I expected any other reaction, I know I shouldn't have. His usual chuckled escaped his lips and he gave me a calculating look.

"Why so angry Roxie?"

_Of course he's acting innocent…_

"You gave me hickeys!"

I stated it angrily…but a deceiving blush crept its way across my cheeks and I stuttered over the word hickeys. I brought my hands up in a futile attempt to hide the embarrassing marks.

A playful grin spread across the face of the infuriating redhead on the bed.

"You didn't care about that before…Besides; I want everyone to know that you're mine."

And that did it…A few simple words and I snapped…

I stomped towards him and started hitting him repeatedly. Not hard, but light enough to where there would a slight sting to them.

"How am I supposed to explain them! Especially when I go to school…?"

School was the least of my worries though…Let them think what they want…My real concern was my father…

A twinge of fear traveled through me and I started hitting Axel's chest just a little harder.

Then suddenly, his arms pulled my waist down so that I was sitting on his lap. That managed to shut me up instantly and a wave of calm settled over me.

Axel's grin grew wider and he moved closer to me, to the point that our noses where touching.

There was no hiding the blush that darkened on my face.

"You'll figure something out…"

I started to throw back a retort, but then my mind went blank. I couldn't look anywhere other than his eyes. I leaned forward and our lips crashed together with a burning need.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and tilted my head, deepening the kiss. His hold around me tightened and I felt hands roam down to my ass.

I broke away from the kiss to moan Axel's name.

When I realized what I had just did, Axel opened his mouth with smirk and I silenced him with another breathtaking kiss.

Not soon after, I felt his hands roam up my torso, leaving goose bumps when his hands went over another area.

The feeling of his touch made me shiver and I needed to get closer to Axel. I pulled his shirt over his head and my hands took their own accord over his body.

Axel kissed down my jaw to my neck, where he bit down gently.

I chuckled, but lolled my head back to give him more room to work with.

"You're d-doing this on purpose…aren't you…?"

The only response I got was the feeling of his smirk on my skin.

Another slightly harder bite under my jaw caused me to moan again, but this time I didn't care about Axel's reaction to it.

I knew where this was going. And I had no doubt in my mind telling me to stop. Right now, I thought I was a fucking idiot for making him stop last night. Axel would never hurt me. I knew that. I trusted that.

After I thought that, I moved my hands down to Axel's jeans, where I somehow quickly managed to undo the button and zipper.

Then Axel's hand gently stopped mine and he looked at me intently.

"Are you sure Roxie?"

He sounded calm, and I knew that if I asked him to stop now…he would. But I also saw how badly he wanted this in his eyes. None of it mattered, I didn't even have to think.

My reply was as simple as reinitiating the kiss while continuing my other job of getting his damned pants off.

I patted his thighs, silently telling him to lift his hips up.

He got the message and readily complied, so that I was able to slide his jeans below his knees so that he could kick the rest off.

The bulge in his boxers was now way noticeable. The mere size of it made me look away.

Axel chuckled at my face and laid me onto the bed, so that he was now on top of me. He looked right into my eyes before he started to palm my hard-on, making me groan.

My pants and boxers were soon discarded onto the floor along with Axel's shirt and pants. Another shiver raked through my body and I moved my hands to Axel's red silk boxers.

I was feeling a little...okay extremely self-conscious about my body and I felt the need to cover up whatever I could.

I needed to lighten the mood and tugged at his red silk boxers.

"Really?"

I chuckled and threw him a teasing look as I snapped the elastic onto his skin.

He threw me my favorite smile and chuckled as well.

"Of course Roxie."

Then I pulled down his boxers where his erect member made itself known. I stroked it slowly a few times, receiving a moan from the redhead above me.

"Roxas…." The way he moaned my name sent shivers down my spine.

I was beyond nervous about what was happening, but the fact that Axel wanted me as much as I wanted him gave me a huge burst of confidence that made my nerves completely disappear.

I saw him reach into the dresser near the bed and pull out the lube. He coated his digits generously with the clear gel.

His fingers probed at my entrance, and he looked at me one last time.

"Are you really sure about this?" His voice was serious, and all I could do was bite my lip in anticipation and nod.

The first finger went in and it didn't even hurt.

The second finger wasn't all that worse.

Now the third finger gave me some discomfort. It was nothing but a slight sting, and I wiggled my hips a bit, trying to get used to the feeling.

I could tell Axel saw the discomfort in my eyes, and by the feel of it, it felt like he was searching for…

"Fuck Axel." I groaned.

I didn't even care about the dumbass smirk that was spread across his face. He continued to tease me for god knows how long, but then his fingers were gone, and once again I felt empty.

I watched as he grabbed the lube again, but this time coated his hardened member with the substance.

"Ready Roxie?"

I nodded once again and he leaned down for a kiss as he slowly entered me. I bit my lip as tears formed in the corner of my eyes.

He stopped for a few moments to let me adjust to the new feeling, and then continued to slowly sheathe himself.

I wiggled in discomfort, but after a few moments I felt like I was ready.

"Y-you can move now."

Axel started moving his hips slowly, and my breath hitched at the sharp pain that followed. I bit my lip, and Axel started looking for that one spot again…

"AHHH! Fuck Axel."

Axel pulled back to the point where his cock was almost out and thrusted back in without warning. The prize: a direct hit to my prostate.

I threw my head back in ecstasy and let out a scream of pleasure. All the pain seemed to be non-existent; the only thing I focused on was Axel, Axel, and more Axel.

"Shit Roxie. You're so tight." Axel moaned.

He started rocking his hips at a slow pace, each thrust bringing strong waves of pleasure throughout my body.

"A-axel… go faster you asshole."

My mind was already gone, and I didn't care about what the hell I was saying. But even in my euphoric state, Axel's teasing eyes turned sadistic.

"Faster?"

Before I could even respond he lifted my leg over his shoulder and quickened his pace. It felt as though he was going deeper with each thrust, and the feeling was welcomed.

A thin film of sweat covered Axel's well-built frame, making him look like a Greek god.

His heavy-lidded eyes were watching me intently as I moaned and cursed in pleasure, just as I was looking at him with my eyes almost closed in ecstasy.

I wrapped my hands around his neck and pulled him in for another kiss, loving the way he was starting to struggle for his breath.

Axel's hands reached for my leaking cock and started pumping in time with his quickening thrusts.

"Axel…I- I'm going to…cum."

My moans grew louder and Axel separated the kiss to whisper in my ear.

"Then cum for me Roxas."

The huskiness of his voice brought me to my climax and I threw my head back with a cry of sheer pleasure.

Axel followed soon after. A rumbling moan emitted from his chest as he quickened his pace, riding out his orgasm.

When he was finished, Axel pulled out and laid next to me, pulling me in close, nuzzling his face into my hair.

I was breathless, and my body was still slightly trembling as euphoria set in. I was stunned into silence at the sheer perfection of it all.

Axel's content voice pulled me out of my stupor.

"I love you Roxie." He whispered with a happy sigh.

I tensed up and buried my face in his chest.

_Did he really just say what I think he said…?_

Axel liking me and wanting to be with me was one thing…But loving me? Was it even possible for someone like me to be loved? Was I capable of loving him back? What if I hurt him? How could I live with myself?

I tried to speak, to convey to Axel what was running through my head, but it was as if I had gone mute. I just lay there opening and closing my mouth like a damn fish.

Besides, even if I could talk I had no idea what I would say. I couldn't say it back, I just couldn't. I couldn't say that I loved him if I wasn't sure. That wouldn't be fair to either of us.

Also, I still had the small fear that eventually Axel would be out of my life. It wasn't fair to think that, but it's just what I was used to. People left…They always did…

"Roxas…"

Axel's gentle whisper of my name let me relax a little, and my mind went blank of worries. I shut my mouth and looked up at him, begging for him to understand.

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><p>After everything that had happened, I just had to say it. I had to let Roxas know just how much I cared about him.<p>

He was everything to me. Since I had met him, my life had turned upside down. And I was glad for it. My life had had no real meaning or significance until Roxas had walked into it.

He made me happy; he didn't even have to try to either. Just having him around me made me smile and feel at ease.

I didn't think it was possible for me to care for him anymore than I already did, but making love to him proved me wrong.

I pulled Roxie closer to me and buried my face into his hair, breathing in his scent and let out a content sigh.

"I love you Roxie."

I wasn't sure what I was expecting, but Roxas tensing up wasn't one of them. It took me off guard and stunned me into silence.

I didn't know the exact reason behind Roxas' reaction but I had a vague idea. He opened and shut his mouth as if he was grasping for what to say in response.

He looked so torn and confused and that was the last thing I wanted.

"Roxas…"

I whispered his name in a gentle soothing tone, attempting to calm him down.

He shut his mouth and looked up with an apologetic yet pleading look.

I pulled him even close to me and kissed his forehead.

"Shush…it's okay Roxas…You don't have to say it back…You don't have to say it back."

The blonde buried his head into my chest, mumbling something that sounded faintly like an apology.

I shook my head and kissed his forehead again, rubbing my hand up and down his back in a soothing manner.

"Shush…it's okay Roxas, it's okay…"

I continued to rub his back and whisper soothing words to him until he eventually fell asleep. And even then I kept it up, also rocking him gently in my arms. I wanted him to know that everything was okay.

Roxas doesn't have to say anything back to me. I'll still love him. My eyes pricked but I forced myself to hold back the small tears of disappointment.

…I just wish he would've said "I love you too."

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><p><strong>Hope you guys enjoyed and aren't too mad at me for being gone for so long. I don't plan on making you wait that long ever again, but I'm also not promising another chapter until after school's over which is the 2nd for me. Though there is a SLIGHT possibility that there MAY be a chapter up before. Just depends.<strong>

**Reviews please :O)**


	19. Making Up

Cornered 19

**Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me.**

**AkuRoku**

**Hey everybody! It's been a long time hasn't it…And I'm so beyond freakin sorry for that! Please don't hate me! This chapter was a total pain in the ass! There's really no excuse I can give that'll make it okay. I was busy and I was lazy and I had little to no motivation to write. And I feel like it's going to be like that for a long time so from now on I am making no promises as to when I will post. The only thing I promise is that I WILL finish this story! Even if it freakin kills me! **

**But for now, here's chapter 19! :3**

After what seemed like months, instead of hours, sunlight started trickling in through the blinds hanging over my bedroom window. I had gotten no sleep last night, and had instead lain awake staring into the darkness of my bedroom as I held Roxas while he slept.

The sudden light ghosting over my face took me off guard. I squeezed my eyes shut tight and buried my face into Roxy's hair as a form of protection. It was the first real movement I had done in hours and my neck cracked in complaint.

I let out a quiet curse and slowly rolled my neck around, knowing I would probably feel the slight pain all day. Roxas, squirming in his sleep, made my movements come to a halt in the hopes of not waking him up. I pulled back slightly to gaze at his face.

His face was slightly scrunched up as if irritated that he might wake up. I slowly pulled him closer and whispered softly that everything was alright. His body relaxed into mine and I breathed a sigh of relief that he hadn't woken up.

Mainly because I wasn't sure how to face what had happened last night. It had never crossed my mind that Roxas may not love me back. And now I didn't know what to do. Did I act like nothing had happened? Or did I reinforce what I had told him last night? That it was okay and I didn't expect him to say it back.

If I brought it up again and insisted on talking about it, I'd probably just be pushing the issue. The last thing I wanted to do was push Roxas away from me, but ignoring it wasn't going to make it go away. Though really, nothing had changed. I was convinced that I had loved Roxas the whole time. The difference now was that my feelings are out there. Whether Roxas felt the same way or not, I still loved him.

With that sorted out on in my head, I came to a conclusion. I would tell Roxas exactly what had just run through my head when he wakes up. I wouldn't pressure him by saying it constantly, but I wasn't going to stop telling him either. And hopefully, in time, Roxas would come to feel the same way. I'm a patient person, and if for some reason he doesn't feel the same way… I would be happy, as long he was in my life.

With that decided, I tried to get comfortable with the intention of getting some sleep before Roxas woke up. I was just on the edge of sleep when my damn phone lit up and started ringing. My eyes snapped open and I glared at the infernal thing before reaching for it. I would've let it go to voicemail if I didn't think it would wake Roxas up.

I picked up my phone, looked at the caller ID, and then I groaned silently. It was Larxene of all people. My thumb lingered over Decline for a few seconds before I gave a resigned sigh and accepted the call.

"Hey Larx…"

I kept my tone civil, but also tried to sound as if she had woke me up. Maybe she'd catch the hint and leave me alone for once. Yea she was my friend, one of my BEST friends…but I was still pissed at her. For all the drama she had caused, and for being a complete bitch to Roxas. She had another thing coming if she thought she'd be forgiven easily.

"Axel! Omigoodness, I am _so_ sorry! Please don't hate me, please. I'll be a complete angel from now on, I promise. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you as a friend Ax. I love you, first and foremost as a brother. I need you in my life. Please don't hate me…"

She trailed off and I heard a faint sniffle come through the phone. If hearing her so broken up hadn't shattered my resolve, the thought of her crying definitely had. I just couldn't handle crying. Especially if it was someone close to me that I cared about. So I let out a resigned sigh and tried to calm her down.

"Larx...Relax, okay? I don't hate you. Yea, you pissed me off…But I could never hate you."

I heard a few more sniffles and then a soft whisper crawl through the phone.

"Y-you don't hate me…? Even though I was a complete bitch to that bo…Roxas?"

I started to grind my teeth when she started to call Roxas, 'that boy' but she corrected herself so I knew she was trying. It wasn't much, but this was Larxene, so it meant tons more than it would have coming from anyone else.

"No, I don't hate you. I promise. Just stop treating Roxas like he's some kind of bug you can squish alright? You need to accept that I lo-care about him a lot, and that he's going to be around for a long time…"

_I hope…_

I was trying to make amends with her, but I also let an edge coat my voice so that she knew I wouldn't tolerate anymore of her bullshit.

I heard her breathe a sigh of relief before she started rambling on in her usual voice. It was such a quick change of attitude I almost thought that she had been acting before. But I was too tired to give it much thought.

"Oh of course Axel! You've got my word. Roxas will see a whole new me the next time I see him, I can promise you that."

I thought the odds of Rox and Larx ever coming face to face again were slim to none but I didn't voice it. I just gave a barely audible affirmation.

"Mhmm…"

I really was tired and was hoping that Larx would take a hint and hang up but no such luck. She prattled on about something and I quietly agreed again before her words registered in my sleep deprived brain.

"Wait, what!"

She gave a haughty huff that was just so Larxene it made me chuckle.

"Geez Ax, are you even listening to me at all? What a jerk! I _said_, you should come over and hang out with me. Please? I miss you and it'll be like making amends. I know you miss me too…"

That wasn't exactly true, though I would be the last person to tell her so. I had been too consumed with thoughts of Roxas, and Roxas himself, to even give much thought to Larxene. But now that I thought about it, her absence was pretty obvious. But that didn't mean I was jumping at the chance to hang out with her either. Last time we had hung out she had nearly shoved her tongue down my throat.

"Seriously Axel! I'm not gonna kiss you if that's what you're worried about!"

_Damn bitch can read minds…!_

"Sorry, just tired Larx, I didn't get much sleep. Maybe we can hang out some other time, yea?"

The last thing I wanted to do was piss her off. If I hated seeing her sad, it was nothing compared to seeing her when she was angry. Anyone that knows her probably suffers from AngryLarxaphobia. So when I indirectly told her no, I winced and waited for the explosion of anger that normally would've proceeded.

Instead she giggled, and it's needless to say that I was completely taken off guard. I wanted to know who I was talking to and what the hell had happened to Larxene? But after thinking about it, this Larxene was better than angry Larxene so I said nothing.

"If you get up and start moving around you'll wake right up. You can always take a nap later anyways. Hell, you could take one here if you wanted to."

_And risk the chance of getting raped in my sleep? I think not…_

"Nah, you know me. Once I'm up, I'm up…"

_Though I'd be asleep right now if you wouldn't have called…_

"Great! So you're coming over?"

The question was loaded. As I pondered my answer I felt like I was tiptoeing across a minefield. There really was only one suitable answer.

"Yea...I'll be there soon…"

I barely finished my sentence before happy squealing started blaring into my ear. I rolled my eyes and chuckled, a slight smile pulling at my lips as I hung up. In a way, if Larx was happy everyone was happy. As long as everything went her way, the world went round.

Which is why I was slightly perturbed by her sudden change of attitude and acceptance towards Roxas…

_Oh well, maybe she cares more about our friendship than I gave her credit for._

I shook my head and turned to stare at Roxas, a more pronounced, yet sad, smile spreading across my face. I hated the thought of leaving him while he was sleeping, but I also didn't want to wake him up AND tell him I was going over to Larxene's. And I may possibly be putting off talking about last night, but that was just a small part of it.

I pulled away from him slowly, so as not to jostle him awake and rose from my bed. He grumbled a slight complaint, but other than that he remained fast asleep. I stretched and then reached down to his face to tuck back the usual lock of blonde hair.

I turned towards my dresser and tugged on some clothes before walking towards my desk and pulling out a piece of paper and a pen. The note was simple and straightforward and I quickly wrote it out. But I faltered when I went to finish it. Should I say I love him or not…? I clenched the pen tighter, slightly digging into the paper as I did so. I struggled with the note a bit longer before capping the pen and folding the note in half.

I pushed away from the desk and walked back over to the edge of the bed. Bending over, I placed the note on my pillow so Roxas would find it right away and kissed his forehead. I went to kiss his lips when a sudden sound made me jump in surprise. His cell phone was going off. Roxas started grumbling in his sleep and I quickly started to track his phone down.

I found it in his pants that had been discarded to the ground the night before. I dug his phone out of the pocket of his pants and looked at the caller ID briefly before answering. It was his Dad. If it had been anyone else I probably would've answered, but I couldn't. I didn't know where he stood with Roxas and I couldn't speak for Roxas either. So I sent the call to voicemail and placed his phone on my pillow next to the note.

As I walked out of my room and through my apartment, I started to ponder and got lost in thought. I had spent all night and this morning thinking it was the end of the world because Roxas hadn't said he loved me. But one simple phone call put everything back into perspective for me. We had much bigger problems to deal with before Roxas and I could ever be happy together.

I was reluctantly dragged out of my best night's sleep as the warmth of the bed started to slowly fade. I was sure that the only reason I had managed to have a night uninterrupted by my usual nightmares was because I had fallen asleep in Axel's arms. Thinking of Axel caused a quick replay of last night to flash through my mind, and I let out a quiet sigh of content.

Then I remembered that Axel was no longer lying next to me and I shot up into a sitting position. The sudden movement sent a jolt of pain to shoot down my spine and I gritted my teeth as I winced. The violent reminder of last night's events started another replay, but this time I silently cursed the redhead for the condition I was left in.

Though I couldn't stay mad at him for very long, just picturing his face left me being swept away by the feelings I had for him. Last night had been the best night of my life, but at the same time it had left me feeling confused and regretful.

Axel loved me but I had no idea how I felt about him. I cared about him deeply and cringed at the thought of not having him in my life but did that mean that I loved him? I mean, I could say the same thing about all of my friends. And the fact that he wasn't here when I woke up was even more confusing…

Was he mad? Upset? Did he have stuff to do that I didn't know about? Or was he just somewhere else in the apartment? Axel was so quiet in his movements that he could easily be on the other side of the bedroom door and I would be totally unaware. But something was telling me that that wasn't the case. Axel had left and not knowing why was killing me.

Though he had told me that it was okay that I didn't tell him I love him back, the first thought to enter my head was that Axel was mad at me and wanted nothing more to do with me. Panic gripped me and I started to feel lightheaded. I fisted the sheets and collapsed onto the bed, ready to curl up and never move.

But as my head hit the pillow I heard a quiet crinkling sound. Looking around for the sound, I noticed that there was a folded up piece of paper on the pillow and I allowed myself to breathe. Axel had left a note; I had nothing to worry about.

_Roxas,_

_Goin to Larxene's for a bit, I'll be back as soon as I can. Last night was amazing. __I love you __Sorry for not being there when you woke up, can't wait to see you later babe. -Axel_

Short and simple, but I had to read it a few times for it to completely sink in. Not only had Axel left me the morning after we had slept together…but he had left me to go spend time with Larxene… It's like she's made it her personal vendetta to come between me and Axel as soon as things start to go right!

And as if that wasn't hurtful enough, I couldn't take me eyes off of the line that Axel had crossed through 'I love you.' It was all too easy to picture his face scrunching up in frustration as he dragged the pen across the paper, unsure if it was okay to write it or not. Picturing it felt like the pen was being dragged across my heart just as fiercely.

I crushed the note in my fist as frustration, confusion, and most of all hurt started to pool up inside of me. Part of me couldn't wait for Axel to come back so that I could find solace in his presence but the other part of me wanted to get back at Axel.

As I was thinking of ways to do just that, my phone started going off. Momentarily distracted, I picked my phone up and realized I had a few missed calls and messages. Two missed calls from Dad that I quickly deleted and a text each from each of my friends. Riku and Kairi had asked if I was okay and how things were going with Axel, while Sora and Namine demanded that I hang out with them today.

Not entirely sure if I was up to my friends company, I decided to call Sora before deciding anything. The phone barely had a chance to ring before he answered.

"Roxas! Finally!"

I chuckled at the tone of Sora's voice. Only he could manage to sound upset yet happy at the same time. I started to explain why I hadn't called until now but before I had a chance to even utter a syllable, Sora was prattling away.

"What's going on! Where are you! At home! With Axel! What happened with you and Axel anyways! You can't leave me hanging like this Roxas! For all I knew you could've been dead in a ditch somewhere!"

Sora's voice hitched slightly and I started to feel bad, though I thought it necessary to point out that he had just seen me yesterday. But before I could, another voice came through the line faintly.

"Sora relax, you're talking to him now aren't you?"

I could easily imagine the glare that Riku had thrown his way for saying that and I chuckled silently.

"That's not the point Riku and you know it! I was worried…"

A pouty tone entered his voice and I decided to start talking before Sora started yelling again.

"Sora calm down, I'm fine. I didn't realize I had to report my every move to you. You know I would've called you if anything bad had happened. I just woke up; give me a second to breathe alright?"

I heard his mouth click shut and I knew he was irritated by what I had said, but he would just have to get over it. I was tired of my friends thinking of me as some poor defenseless child. I expected Sora to start lecturing me but surprisingly he didn't.

"Fine, whatever, at least let me yell at Axel for distracting you then."

I went quiet when Sora mentioned Axel, pondering once again where we stood after last night. He loved me…I didn't say it back…He said it was alright…but he wasn't here, he'd left…To go to Larxene's of all places. I was ready to slam my head into the wall with how conflicting it all was.

"Roxas?"

Sora's voice pulled me out of my internal struggle and I quickly shook my head, trying to rid it of all thought.

"Sorry Sora…he's…not here right now."

I tried to sound as casual as possible but Sora wasn't buying it at all.

"What happened?"

I winced, not entirely ready to talk about it. Maybe I was overreacting and shouldn't jump to conclusions until I had had a chance to talk with Axel.

"Nothing, why do you ask?"

"Bull Roxas! I know when you're lying, you're terrible at it. Now what happened?"

Great…Now I was stuck making something up or telling Sora what had really happened. Neither of which I was willing to do. So, I decided to delay it a bit.

"Look…How about I come over and we can talk at your place?"

That way I could come up with a story if necessary, and I wouldn't have to be alone in Axel's apartment anymore either. It just isn't the same if he's not here with me.

"Fine. See you in a bit Rox."

The line went dead and I let my phone fall to the bed as I hunched into myself. I'd wallow in self hatred and pity for a bit and then I'd go to Sora and Riku's and force a smile on my face.

As soon as I'd stepped out of my apartment and started heading for Larxene's I was already regretting my decision. But I'd already told her I'd come over so there was no getting out of it now. If I even tried to change my mind, she'd probably kill me.

I kept telling myself that going to Larxene's was a good thing. The last time I had seen her had ended in a horrible fight and this was a good chance to make up with her. But in all honesty I was just a coward…I was too afraid to face Roxas after last night.

I just didn't know how to face him right now...For all I know I could've scared him off after opening my big mouth…I should've just kept quiet…

I continued mentally beating myself up the rest of the way to Larxene's, and by the time I got there I was totally drained. I groaned and briefly hesitated before knocking on her door.

Larxene threw the door opened and launched herself at me. I hadn't been expecting it and my knees gave out under her added weight. All the air whooshed out of my lungs as we fell to the ground. She couldn't have cared less though. She just wrapped her arms around me in a tight hug.

"Axel! I've missed you so much!"

She squealed so loudly that my ears started ringing. I was finding it hard to breathe though so I squirmed a bit and tried to shove her off of me.

"Geez Larxene! Get off! You're too fat to be sitting on me like that!"

The words slipped out of my mouth before I had even thought about it, and just like that her whole demeanor changed. Her eyes narrowed into a glare and if I didn't know any better I'd swear that an ominous aura was emitting from her.

"Did you…just called me fat…?"

I quickly tried to backpedal and placate her before she turned violent.

"Now Larx…you know I didn't mean it…I had a rough night…and you know I'm cranky when I haven't gotten enough sleep…you're the farthest thing from fat! I promise!"

And once again, Larxene flipped a switch and went back to being all smiles and squeals. She giggled and wrapped in another hug.

"Oh I know that! I was just teasing!"

_I swear she's bipolar…._

Once her hug fest was over she practically dragged me inside her apartment. I quickly realized that I hadn't been here since she had first moved. I was impressed by how nice and organized it looked. It was the total opposite of her last place.

"Your apartment looks great Larx. I like it."

To my surprise, instead of thanking me and gloating about the place she huffed and threw a glare over her shoulder. Had I said something?

"Yea…no thanks to you though…"

Her voice had an unexpected edge to it and I didn't understand why she had suddenly got irritated with me.

"What's that supposed to mean? What'd I do?"

She rolled her eyes and stormed away to what I presumed to be the living room.

"Oh just forget it!"

Starting to get frustrated as well, I went after her to figure out what her problem was.

"No I thought we were supposed to be making up? Not fighting! Tell me what's wrong? What did I do?"

She was the one that damn near demanded that I come over here and now she was picking a fight? What the hell?

She rounded on me and I was taken off guard by how hurt and confused she looked.

"Nothing Axel! You did absolutely nothing! That's the problem! You were supposed to be helping me move in but you never did! You've been too busy spending all your time with that blonde haired midget of yours!"

I was going to defend myself and apologize but as soon as she started to attack Roxas I forgot all about that.

"What happened to being a whole different person Larx? Just half an hour ago you were saying that you'd stop being a jealous bitch towards him and that we were just friends? Was that all a lie then?"

Her face puckered up into a pout but I didn't care. If she was going to be a bitch I had every right to be an ass back.

"No…it wasn't a lie but…I just miss you so much! It feels like I'm losing my best friend! I've known you for years, and you've know him how long? A month! And you have no problem pushing me and your friends aside to spend time with him! I think I have every right to be fuckin upset Axel! Damn!"

That made me feel a tad bit guilty, but she still had no right to be a cold hearted bitch towards Roxas! I love him!

As soon as I thought that all the fight left me. I had other things to worry about other than Larxene's petty jealousy and woes me act. She'd get over it, and if she didn't it was on her if she lost me as a friend.

"Whatever Larxene…"

I collapsed onto her couch and hung my head. I should've never come over…I should've just stayed at home with Roxas. At least there I wouldn't have a pounding headache.

I was about to get up and leave but Larxene plopped down next me.

"Axel? Did something happen? What's wrong?"

As much as her antics pissed me off, Larxene knew me very well. Anyone else would think that I was just upset about the fight, but she knew something else was going. But how could I talk to her about it? She wanted nothing to do with it.

"Nothin Larx…you don't wanna know."

She scoffed and lightly slapped the back of my head.

"Moron, I may be a bitch that doesn't mean I don't care. You can talk to me."

I threw her a disbelieving look.

"Really? Even if it's about Roxas?"

For a split second her face screwed up with dislike but then when she saw my irritated expression she sighed and nodded her head.

"Yes Axel…As much as I don't like him, you can talk to me about him as well."

I hadn't been expecting her to say that, and it convinced me that she really did want to hear about it.

"Fine…Last night I had sex with Roxas."

She stiffened slightly but despite however much she didn't like hearing that she nodded for me to continue.

"That sounds like it'd be a good thing, so what happened after?"

I shook my head, wishing I hadn't said anything. I already knew that telling her would make her hate Roxas even more. She wouldn't care about his reasoning at all. But still, I continued.

"I told him I loved him…"

She sighed and frustration and grinded her teeth before responding.

"Once again...that sounds like a good thing. Could you get to the damn point Axel?"

_That's what I'm trying to do!_

"Don't you think I'm trying? Ever think that maybe it's too hard to fucking say? He doesn't love me back! Okay Larxene? He doesn't feel the same way. And I bet you're just overjoyed to hear that too!"

I pushed myself off of her coach and started pacing around her living room. I was frustrated enough as it, but Larxene sitting on the couch and just staring at me made it worse.

I kept waiting for her to jump up and start rubbing it in my face that Roxas didn't feel the same way. An 'I told you so' would be thrown in there countless times too. And eventually she would bring it back to how she loves me and I should be with her.

I was expecting all of that so the words that came out of her mouth completely took me off guard.

"I'm gonna kill him!"

Pure hatred had etched its way onto her face and she started to push herself off of the couch but I grabbed and pushed her back down.

"What?"

She struggled a bit and pushed at me but I wouldn't let her up.

"Damn it Axel let me go! You heard me! I'm gonna rip that brat to shreds!"

I didn't understand why she was so angry. Wouldn't him not loving me be a good thing?

"Why? Aren't you happy?"

She froze and threw me a look that made me feel completely stupid.

"Why the hell would I be happy Axel? Are you a complete moron? He hurt you and that is not okay! Now let me up!"

"Fine! But you have to promise that you won't leave until you explain?"

She glared at me for a few moments and mumbled under her breath but then she stopped struggling and gave a slight nod.

"Now why are you so angry? I thought that you 'loved' me and wanted Roxas out of my life?"

She rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"Axel…you really don't understand anything do you?"

The past few moments had made me feel extremely stupid so I didn't argue.

"Gah! You're half right. Yes, I love you and would like to be with you. But I know that you'll never feel that way and I'm slowly coming to terms with that. Which means that I am very slowly coming to accept Roxas as well. But that was only when I was under the impression that you two idiots were madly in love with each other! Now that he's hurt you and you're not together anymore he's on my freakin hit list okay? Now can you please let me go kill him?"

I processed what she said for a few moments and I guess I could kinda understand her thought process. But that didn't mean I wanted her psycho ass chasing down my boyfriend either.

"No! If you hurt him I'll never speak to you again! And we're still together you psycho!"

She crossed her arms across her chest and pouted a bit but it seemed like she had calmed down so I relaxed as well.

"Just leave it alone Larx, it'll be okay."

_I think…_

She glared at me for a few seconds before giving a resigned sigh.

"Fine. I'll be back in a little while okay?"

She went to reach for her keys but I grabbed them first.

"Damn it Larxene! I said leave him alone!"

She started glaring at me again but she also looked a little hurt.

"Would you relax! I'm going to get food. Unless you want me to cook. Don't you trust me?"

If I was honest with myself I wasn't sure if I did or not. I used to but after Roxas came into the picture I was never sure what to expect from Larxene. But I'd had enough experience with Larxene's so called 'cooking' to know that take out was the safest option.

"Alright. Don't take too long though. I need to go back home soon."

I tensed myself for an argument but all she did was nod and then walk down the hall towards the front door.

As she was walking out of the door, I had an unnerving feeling that I was going to regret letting her out that door.

Maybe I should've just let her cook…

**Gah! Yay! I** **mean I don't think it's that great of a chapter but I love it all the same ^^ And I really hope that you guys enjoyed it! **

**Please Review! :O)**


	20. Confrontation and Confession

Cornered 20

**Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me**

**AkuRoku**

**Yay! Another chapter! XD You guys should really thank my beta! If they hadn't motivated *cough* forced *cough* me to write, this chapter would still be wandering around in my head! **

**So it is midnight here, which makes it August 13****th****, which means…IT'S AKUROKU DAY! XDDDDD I finished this chapter a few days ago but I really wanted to wait and post it today and I'm soooo excited! Like, I've literally been waiting hours to do this! XDD This is a really long chapter, and a roller coaster of events, so find a seat, strap in and enjoy the ride! XD**

* * *

><p>Initially I had planned on taking my time before leaving for Sora's. Clean up a bit, take a shower, maybe eat some breakfast. Normal routines that would let me calm down and stop and think. But as I walked through the apartment that plan was quickly done away with. The whole place just screamed Axel. I don't know why that surprised me; it was his apartment after all. But still, I could practically picture him in the apartment and his scent lingered everywhere I went. It was maddening. So I threw on some clean clothes and bolted out the door without a second thought. I just had to get away.<p>

You'd think that a bit of sunshine wouldn't be too much to ask considering everything, but apparently it was. Just a few minutes after leaving Axel's place the sun was covered up with dark gray clouds. Almost as if my depressed mood decided to manifest itself around me. And though I probably knew better, I stupidly thought that it couldn't get any worse. Right on cue, the sky darkened even more and I knew that if I didn't hurry to Sora's I'd be caught out in the rain. My gloomy mood and the darkness of the impending storm seemed to have seeped into everyone around me and as I weaved through the masses of people on the street, I felt like I was being dragged along by a slow tide.

As I approached an intersection I saw a flash of bright yellow out of the corner of my eye but I paid it little attention, contributing it the stop light hanging over the street and kept walking. But then an unexpected weight barreled into me, knocking my breath out of me and pushing me up against the nearest building. My head had slammed back into the building and my vision went blurry and all I heard was a high-pitched ringing sound. It took a few moments for my vision to clear and to see that Larxene was the one that had attacked me and was screaming at me.

"Who the hell do you think you are you fucking brat!?"

If it had been any other time I probably would've been scared and cowering away from her accusing glare. But I was so not in the mood and had had enough of her bullshit. So I wrenched away from her grip and shoved her away from me with all my might. I sent her sprawling to the ground and the shocked expression on her face was priceless.

"What the fuck is your problem!? You've been a total bitch to me since we met! What in the hell did I do to you to make you hate me so much!?"

Larxene glared up at me from the ground before pushing herself back up onto her feet and brushing herself off. I had a feeling I knew what her problem was, Axel had gone to hang out with her after all, but that didn't give her any right to be a psycho bitch!

"Are you really asking me that question!? You swoop in out of nowhere and steal my best friend away from me! Not only that, he falls head over fucking heels in love with you! And to top the whole damn thing off, as soon as he tells you that you drop him like he meant nothing to you! How fucking heartless can you be!? You're either too chicken shit to admit you love him too or you're just too fucked up in the head up to love anybody!"

I flinched away, as if her words had psychically reached out and struck me. I was surprised by how close to the truth she was. I could understand her knowing about what had happened with Axel. They were best friends, as much as I hated it, and he had gone to hang out with her. It would have surprised me more if he hadn't told her. No, what surprised me was how she blatantly referred to how fucked up my life was cause of my dad. At first I started to get angry with Axel, how dare he tell her something so personal! But then I remembered she had seen firsthand my dad's behavior when he interrupted our baseball game. It wouldn't take much effort after seeing that to guess what happens at home.

I wanted to yell at her and call her a heartless bitch for throwing it in my face like that. But I didn't. She was right after all, to an extent at least. I wasn't sure how I felt, mainly because I was scared I'd end up hurting Axel. I wasn't about to have a heartfelt conversation with her though, so I just rolled my eyes and turned away from her.

"I don't know how I feel, okay!? Is that so wrong!?"

She gave me a hateful glare and without even saying a word I knew exactly what she was thinking. Yes, it was very wrong. And as much as I hated to admit it, the bitch was right. That just made me feel ten times guiltier than I already did. How could I string Axel along after everything he'd done for me? After everything we'd been through? It made me hate myself even more and as much I'd rather eat nails then cry in front of Larxene, tears started to run down my face.

"What am I supposed to do!? He probably hates me now and I don't know what to do! I can't lose him!"

If I hadn't been so confused and upset, I probably would've died laughing at the dumbfounded expression Larxene's face; though I probably had a similar look on my face as well. I was asking Larxene of all people for help and relationship advice!? The enemy!? The psycho bitch!?

"Well you could always, umm I don't know, tell him that you love him too you dolt! Or go throw yourself off of a building! I'd pay money to see that!"

Gah! If I didn't think she'd kill me for it I would've punched her right there and then!

"Seriously!? Could you maybe try to show just a tiny bit of sympathy? You have no idea what I'm going through or what I'm feeling you heartless bitch!"

I had meant to stay calm; offending the enemy was not going to help anything. But how the hell was I supposed to act when the psycho bitch told me to go kill myself!? But I instantly regretted it, as soon as those words were out of my mouth I feared for my life. A low growl escaped her lips and I swear her eyes turned red with rage.

"How many fucking times are you going to call me a bitch!? If Axel didn't care about you so much, you'd be dead you brat! Now before you try my patience, why don't you explain to me what you're going through if you want my help so bad!?"

I gaped at Larxene as if she had three heads. She was actually willing to help me? Didn't she just tell me to go jump off a building? I was taken off guard and totally distracted. While I was trying to process her sudden change of heart and figure out what I was going to tell her, rain drops started to fall from the sky. The rain seemed to dissolve Larxene's anger; she turned her glare away from me and stared up at the sky with a questioning scowl.

"I didn't know it was supposed to rain today…great…my hairs gonna be ruined now…"

I couldn't help the disbelieving scoff that passed my lips when I heard her say that. She was really worried about her hair…? She was glaring at me again with an arched eyebrow.

"What's so funny!?"

I couldn't help but laugh some more.

"You do know your fugly hair makes you look like a damn bug don't you?"

She scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Puhlease! At least I don't walk around looking like I was fucking electrocuted!"

Really!? She was going to make fun of my hair!?

"Don't you even start! Axel's hair is way spikier than mine and you're obsessed with him!"

I expected her to start yelling or try to hit me or something, but surprisingly enough her lips pulled up into an amused smile and she giggled. Which in my mind was really creepy. Not only had she smiled, but then she giggled!? It just wasn't natural. All I could was gape at her, unsure of what to expect next. But after a few moments I couldn't help it, I was laughing with her. It didn't make any sense. Two people that totally hated each other were standing in the rain, completely drenched and laughing about who knows what. It took us a little while to get a hold of ourselves and quit laughing, and once we did she looked at me expectantly. I gave a resigned sigh and shrugged my shoulders.

"I care about him…Which is why I'm scared to get too close and get attached. I'm terrified of hurting him…I can't lose him…but he probably hates me now…"

She nodded her head a bit and pondered silently. Anyone else would've heard the desperate tone in my voice when I said that Axel probably hated me and would've tried to reassure me that it wasn't true. But Larxene wasn't my friend and even if she was I doubted she was that kind of person.

"So is that why you left? Because you're _sooo_ terrified of hurting him?"

The mocking tone in her voice made me grind my teeth but I knew that in her own way she was trying to help so I held back every insult that sprang into my mind.

"What makes you think I left…?"

She raised her eyebrow at me as if I was an idiot and gestured towards me.

"Why else would you be out of his apartment after last night? You seem like the type that would mope around like a poor lost puppy until he came back."

I so desperately wanted to tell Larxene to go fuck herself but I held my tongue, not wanting to ruin…whatever was going on between us now. Whatever it was, it was better than her wanting my head on a platter.

"He left first…and I just couldn't be there anymore! There was too much of him there! And I needed someone to talk to! So I'm going to a friend's place for a while. After I'm done there I'm going straight back…that is…if Axel still wants me there…?"

This time I deliberately turned it into a question, hoping she wouldn't just blow me off this time. I really needed to hear that Axel didn't hate my guts now. Fresh tears started flowing again but thankfully the rain made them not so noticeable. Or maybe it didn't, because Larxene's face softened a bit and gave a resigned sigh.

"You really need to chill. Look, Axel is a big boy. You don't have to worry about hurting him. Besides, he wants to be with you. Isn't that enough?"

I nodded my head vaguely, knowing she had a point. If I was in her shoes I would've said the same thing to a friend, though in a lot more caring and sympathetic way. Still, I knew that what she said made sense. But for some reason I just couldn't grasp the idea and apply it to myself. I felt like I was the exception and that no matter what I would hurt him.

"Would you get over yourself!? You're not the center of his fucking universe! If you guys break up he'll move on! Damn!"

I flinched away involuntarily. It was as if she had known exactly what I was thinking and the way she hissed her words out scared me. I just couldn't keep up with her sudden mood swings. Once second she's being semi nice and trying to help, and the next she's glaring at me like I'm a pariah. But what she said made me wonder about something. Maybe it wasn't so much me being scared of hurting Axel, maybe I was more scared of him getting over me. What if we broke up and I wanted to fix things but he didn't? Maybe I was just some fling for him…He was older and more experienced than me. Why the hell would he want a relationship with a kid like me?

I had no idea how to respond to her so I just stared at her, unsure of where we stood now. Thankfully the awkward moment soon came to an end though. Just as I opened my mouth to say something, a bolt of lightning lit up the sky followed by a loud crack of thunder that made both of us jump. Larxene shivered and pulled her jacket closer around her.

"Look I'll talk to Axel alright? I need to get heading back. You shouldn't be out in this so you hurry to wherever you're going to."

I was surprised by the hint of concern she was showing but I figured she was just ready to have me out of her hair. I nodded and then she turned and ran down the street. I started walking the other way towards Sora's before Larxene's voice stopped me.

"Hey blondie!"

_Not this again…_

It was like meeting Axel all over again!

"My name's Roxas!"

She shrugged and rolled her eyes.

"Whoever. Just so we're clear, I still hate you!"

"And I still think you're a pain in the ass!"

"Brat!"

"Bitch!"

It was a relief to go back to the name calling and throwing insults at each other. As much as I appreciated her help, it really freaked me out to see her acting sort of nice. She narrowed her eyes and flipped me off and started running through the rain. I would've started running too but I was already drenched and late, there was no point in hurrying. So I just decided to take my time walking to Sora's while I thought about everything that had just been said.

* * *

><p>Larxene had been gone a lot longer than I expected her to be. I mean I knew she didn't really have a concept for time, but still how long did it take to run out and grab some food? It irritated me more than anything else; because she knew that I was in somewhat of a hurry to get back home to Roxas. But my irritation turned to worry as it started to rain and then morphed into a storm. I would've called to see what was taking her so long but she had conveniently forgotten her cell phone. So I was pacing up and down her living room, thinking of all kinds of things I'd like to say to her when she got back, when finally she came traipsing into her apartment. I wanted to yell at her and vent out all of my frustration but she was disheveled and looked like she'd swam back instead of walked.<p>

"Are you okay?"

She stopped for a brief moment on her way to the kitchen, seeming taken aback by the concern in my voice.

"Yea, why?"

My stomach growled and I was glad that at least we would be able to eat while I figured out what had taken her so long to get back. But then I started to get irritated again when I noticed that she had nothing with her, unless she was hiding food under the thin jacket she was wearing.

"Why? You left an hour ago to get food, were caught out in a storm and you come back looking like a mess and you have no food to show for it!"

She shrugged her shoulders as she slipped out of her jacket and hung it over one of her kitchen chairs.

"Well, I ran into Roxas and we talked for a bit. I was going to get food but it started storming and I didn't think you'd appreciate wet food. We'll just order a pizza okay? Chill."

Out of everything she said, only one word registered in my brain.

"Roxas?"

She rolled her eyes and threw me a glare as she leaned over the sink to wring her hair out.

"Yes Roxas!"

I tensed up, suddenly slightly scared.

"What did you do to him Larx!? Is he okay!?"

She crossed her arms and leaned back against the counter.

"I didn't do anything to your precious boy toy Axel, like I said all we did was talk. And when I left him he was perfectly fine. Well physically at least, emotionally he seemed pretty messed up."

I glared at her and took a seat at her kitchen table.

"Dammit Larxene! You had no business going to my apartment in the first place! I told you to leave him alone!"

She huffed in annoyance and shook her head.

"Okay, one I didn't go to your fuckin apartment Axel. I ran into him on the street on my way to get food! And two, I didn't do anything to him! Okay, that's kind of a lie. At first I yelled at him but then we talked and you know, he's not so bad. You'd be proud of me. I was actually sort of nice to Roxas."

Something had to be wrong with my hearing, because nothing that Larxene just said added up or made any sense at all. Why would Roxas not be at home? And Larxene hated Roxas, there's no way that she would say he's not so bad. And the most confounding part of all? She fucking called him Roxas!

"What do you mean you ran into him on the street? Where was he going?"

Larxene just shrugged her shoulders and pulled a soda out of the fridge.

"How the hell should I know? I didn't ask him. He just said he couldn't stand to be at your place since last night and was going to a friend's."

And now I was worried. Did he really say he couldn't stand to be at my place anymore? Or was Larx just adlibbing? And what friend was he talking about? I automatically assumed it was Sora's but I couldn't be certain. It didn't matter anyways, it's like not like I could just show up and ask him to come back with me. No matter what she said, he had left for a reason. And to top it all off, Larxene had left him in the middle of the storm!

"I'm going after him!"

I pushed myself out of the chair and was halfway across the kitchen before Larxene grabbed my arm.

"I think you should leave him alone for a while Axel. He was pretty clear that he wanted to talk to his friend. Besides, he can take care of himself."

"Let go of me!"

I tried to wrench my arm out of her grasp but she just held on tighter and shook her head.

"Axel, just stop and think for a second! Things are already on thin ice as it is. If you go chasing after him when he clearly wants to be alone you're gonna do more harm than good. Do you want to push him away?"

I really didn't care what Larxene thought. All that mattered to me right now was whether or not Roxas was okay. But the fact that she was actually trying to help things between me and Roxas made stop and listen to her and I realized that she actually had a point. A really really small one though.

"I just…I'm scared that he thinks that I hate him! He needs to know that I don't! I don't want to lose him over a stupid misunderstanding!"

I slumped in defeat and she loosened her grip on my arm but she started nodding with a smug smirk on her face.

"Yes, you should be scared. That's exactly what he thought!"

A horrified expression made its way onto my face but before I could say anything Larxene continued to ramble on.

"But lucky for you, you have a great friend like me to set him straight. Now he knows that you do not hate him and still want to be with him. And he was very relieved. You two have nothing to worry about. And just to point out the obvious, this whole thing could've been avoided if you had of stayed home! Idiot! Why the hell did you come over!?"

I gaped at her. Did she really just say that!?

"You practically forced me to come over here! If I had said no you would've killed me! You psycho!"

She giggled and shook her head.

"Oh Axel, you're so silly! I'm an angel; I wouldn't have hurt you just because you wanted to stay at home with Roxas. What kind of friend do you think I am?"

_A crazy psychotic one…_

I was so busy thinking of ways to torture Larxene that I didn't even notice that she had left the room.

"I'm going to go change out of these wet clothes and then I'll order a pizza. Stick around here for a little while Axel and then you can go back home and obsess over your boy toy. Stop worrying. Things are gonna work out just fine. Trust me."

I followed after her and grabbed her arm gently.

"How can you be so sure Larx…? He doesn't feel the same way…"

She sighed and flicked me on the forehead.

"Like I said, you have nothing to worry about. Can I please go change? I'm freezing!"

I didn't let go.

"How can you be so sure!?"

"Damn you're persistent! I just know okay!?"

The look in her eyes made me start to get hopeful.

"So he loves me?"

She hesitated and bit her lip.

"Well…I'm not too sure but if he doesn't, he's well on his way. I mean really, who wouldn't fall in love with you Axel? You're amazing…"

The wistful tone in her voice made me start to feel a bit guilty but I shoved it aside. Larxene would get over it; she was trying to help after all. She figured out quickly that I had nothing to say to that so she wrenched her arm free and slapped my chest.

"Now for the last time, you go sit your ass on the couch while I go change! Food will be here soon! And I swear if you are still moping I will hurt you!"

She walked away without waiting for a response. I shook my head and chuckled softly as I went back to the living room. Even though I knew that Larxene had said to leave Roxas alone and wouldn't approve, I pulled out my phone and sent him a text asking if he was okay. I didn't see how there was could be anything wrong with that.

* * *

><p>Just as I got to Sora's, my phone started to buzz in my pocket. I pulled my phone out slowly, wanting it to be Axel but not wanting to get my hopes up either.<p>

**You okay? –Axel**

I couldn't help the relieved smile that appeared on my face. Axel was thinking about me. It was all the reassurance I needed at the moment. I was still very conflicted about last night though. I quickly typed out that I was fine, at Sora's and would be back tonight and then sent the text. Then I knocked on Sora's door as I turned my phone off and shoved it into my pocket. I rolled my eyes as I heard a low thumping coming from the other side of the door as Sora ran through the apartment.

The door was barely open for a second before Sora was yanking me into the apartment and throwing a towel around me.

"Geez Roxas! You're soaked! You said you left a while ago! Why did it take you so long!? You had me worried! Ever hear of calling someone!?"

I rolled my eyes and shoved him away from me, and tried to dry my hair off with the towel.

"Sora, it was just a little rain. If you were so worried why didn't you just call me?"

Sora started to throw back a retort but before he could, Riku came strolling down the hall with an amused smirk on his face.

"Because he's an idiot, that's why. How's it going Roxas?"

Riku leaned over the back of the couch and ruffled Sora's hair so that he'd stop pouting over being called an idiot. Then he threw a questioning smile my way, silently asking if I was okay. I wasn't entirely sure how to answer, so I shrugged my shoulders before collapsing onto the couch next to Sora. I opened my mouth to speak but before I could even utter a sound, Sora's hand was clamped over my mouth.

"No! Wait until Namine and Kairi get here before launching into your sob story."

I glared at him and told him that he was being a jerk but because his hand was still over my mouth it just came out as a garbled mess. Ignoring my irritation with him, Sora just arched his eyebrows in a just-listen-to-me way.

"Come on Roxas, this way you won't have to repeat yourself. You know you hate doing that."

I really didn't want to admit he was right, but he was. That last thing I wanted to do was recount the story twice. I was scared to even tell it once. I knew that at least one of them, if not all, was going to overreact and jump to my defense. They wouldn't understand that it was all my fault. I glared at him a bit longer before giving up and pulling away to pout a bit.

"Really Sora? You had to work the girls up?"

Sora just shrugged, either not realizing or caring that I was upset. While Riku just chuckled and ruffled my hair before walking towards the kitchen.

"Come on Roxas, those two are always worked up. You know that. Want a bottle of water?"

I nodded appreciatively as he threw one my way, caught it and took a quick drink before complaining some more.

"Yea, but still, there's nothing for them to worry about. You know that when they get here they are gonna faun over me like a lost puppy or something…"

I trailed off as my voice took on an unwanted sulking tone. It was only going to get more pity than I was already going to get. I didn't want people worrying about me or pitying me. Mainly because, there was a lot to worry about and I was probably the most pitiful person ever. Sora and Riku both exchanged a worried look with each other, but before they could say anything Namine came busting through their front door with Kairi in tow.

"Hey boys! Miss us?"

Namine winked at all of is as she shuffled through the apartment and straight to the kitchen. Kairi rolled her eyes and smiled apologetically as she plopped down onto the couch next to me and gave me a quick hug.

"Hey Roxas, Sora said something was up. Everything okay?"

I shrugged my shoulders at first, trying to brush off her question, but Sora had already turned traitor and told them something was wrong. Why lie? So I just shook my head and leaned back against the couch, clutching a pillow to my chest. I knew I couldn't put off telling them any longer, but Namine was still scrounging around in the pantry. We all glared at her until she was finally done stuffing her face and came into the living room.

"Damn, who died?"

Kairi scoffed and rolled her eyes as she threw her arm over my shoulders.

"Geez Nams! Could you be any more insensitive!? Something's wrong with Roxas! You know that's why we came over here!"

Namine stopped dead in her tracks when Kairi started yelling at her. I was shocked too, Kairi rarely raised her voice. But then Namine's expression hardened into a glare.

"Stop acting like a perfect little princess Kai! When _isn't_ something wrong with Roxas!? We're comforting him over something on a daily basis it seems! When we got off the phone with Sora, you yourself wondered what it was this time!"

Kairi huffed and pushed herself off of the couch, going to stand directly in front of Namine.

"You make it sound so much worse then what it was! I didn't say it with a bitchy snarky tone like yours! I was just worried and concerned about what had happened to him! Unlike you, I'm a good friend!"

I flinched away from what they were saying. They were fighting, and the reason they were fighting was because I was an irreparable mess. Namine dropped her jaw in shock and was about to yell another retort but I couldn't take anymore.

"Stop it! Stop fighting! Stop yelling! I get enough of that shit at home! If you're gonna stay at each other's throats the whole time, I'm leaving!"

I glared at the two of them before heading towards the door but Kairi's hand on my arm stopped me.

"Please don't go Rox. We're sorry."

I looked at Kairi and I could tell that she really was sorry, but that wasn't enough to convince me to stay. I looked at Namine, waiting. She had her arms crossed across her chest, stubbornly looking everywhere but at me. But after a moment she sighed and smiled at me apologetically.

"Roxas, I'm sorry about what I said…but it's sort of true. It doesn't mean we don't love you though. Just…it'd be nice to be called to hang out and get here to find you happy and with a smile already on your face, ya know? We see you hurting all the time, and it hurts us too…"

I couldn't believe the words that were coming out of her mouth. I didn't care if they were true or not! You just didn't say shit like that!

"Gee, thanks Namine! I'm _so _sorry that my life's _so _fucked up and that it inconveniences you _so_ much! Last I checked, you guys were my friends and you were supposed to help me through this shit! Not get annoyed by it! I'm always the one trying to keep this shit to myself and leave you guys out of it! But you always force it out of me! I'll just keep my fucking mouth shut from now on!"

Before anyone else could say something that would make me feel bad and stay, I wrenched my arm away from Kairi and stormed out of the apartment. I heard the door open behind and Sora yelling for me to come back, but I ignored him. Why should I go back? Namine was being a bitch, Kairi may be sorry but she was still thinking like Namine, and Sora and Riku hadn't jumped to my defense at all so they must have been thinking it too. Maybe there was always crap going, but it's not like I had any control of it! What did they expect me to do? Just put it on pause so that they didn't have to deal with it all the time? Life just didn't fucking work that way!

I was busy ranting in my head and keeping my head down as I roamed the streets that I didn't even notice the car that was driving along beside me. And once I did notice it, I didn't pay it any attention. I was too mad and upset to really care about anything. But then I heard my name being bellowed from inside the car and the driver finally had my attention. My dad was glaring at me. My first instinct was to run and put as much distance between myself and him as possible. But his glare had my feet planted in place. I was too scared to move.

"H-hey Dad…"

I smiled sheepishly at him and started to reach for my phone, automatically wanting to call Axel for help.

"Where the hell have you been!? You didn't come last night!? I've been calling and calling your phone! Why didn't you answer!?"

As soon as he said that I stopped. If he saw my phone he'd get even madder than he already is. Thankfully my phone was already off so I didn't have to worry about being caught in a lie.

"Oh, sorry about that. I stayed at a friend's house last night, I must've left my phone there…I'll go and get it now!"

I turned and started to walk away, hoping that he'd just let me go. No such luck.

"Roxas! You're not going anywhere! You can get your phone tomorrow at school! Just get in the damn car!"

There was no arguing with him, I had no choice. I grimaced as I slid into the car. It smelled of beer and sweat and I could just feel my father's anger and resentment rolling off of him in waves. And school? I didn't even know what day of the week it was, let alone what was going on in school. I tried not to fidget as we rode along in silence, ignoring all the glares sent my way as much as possible.

"Whose place were you at anyways! It better not have been that asshole redhead! If I catch you hanging around hi—"

"No! I was at…Kairi's. I haven't seen Axel since you sent him away! I swear!"

I had momentarily forgotten about what had happened between Dad and Axel, he'd kill me if he found out that I had stayed the night there…and would hopefully do it again many times. I felt like Kairi's was a safe to say I was at. Dad didn't really know who she was so he couldn't really disapprove. Though today just had to be the day that he was actually curious about my life…

"Kairi? That your girlfriend?"

I silently groaned at the question. Why the hell did he care!? But the idea of Kairi and I together was too absurd to handle and I started laughing. Of course he had no idea why I was laughing, because he was totally in the dark about me being gay. I was pretty sure he wouldn't approve and he really didn't need another reason to hate me.

"God Dad, no! She's just a friend! I don't have a girlfriend!"

I expected him to get angry because I was yelling at him, but he just shrugged his shoulders and averted his eyes to the road. Obviously he didn't care that much or he would've asked more questions. I was more than happy to ride in silence though. Anything was better than him yelling and beating the crap out of me. I felt bad though. I had told Axel that I'd be back tonight, but it looked like I was going to be stuck at home. There was no way Dad was going to let me out of the house, and I had no excuse to convince him otherwise. I'd have to wait until I was alone so that I could call or text Axel and let him know.

Dread filled me as we pulled into the driveway. Things had seemed relatively okay in the car, but things always took a drastic change as soon as we were at home. We were behind closed doors and I turned into his own personal punching bag. But I hadn't done anything wrong, and as long as it stayed that way, I had a chance of making it through the night unharmed.

We slipped right back into our usual routine. He grabbed a beer and watched TV in the living room while I cooked dinner. He grabbed another beer and we sat at the table to eat. He grabbed another beer and retreated back to the living room while I did the nights dishes. Then I grudgingly went to my room and tried to get caught up on all the homework I had been missing. My phone seemed to burn as it rested in my back pocket. I was dying to take it out and call Axel, text him at the very least. My Dad was passed out in the living room, but luck was never on my side. I couldn't just sit in my room and act like nothing was wrong though. So I hurriedly pulled my phone out of my pocket and turned it on. I quickly typed up a text.

**Dad dragged me home…Can't come back tonight… -Roxas **

Just then I heard my dad thundering down the hallway. I panicked and threw my phone under my pillow, turning around to face my dad just as he stepped into my room. I tried to wipe the guilty expression off of my face by smiling at him.

"H-Hey…"

He froze and stared at me suspiciously. I rarely greeted him with a smile and I was acting pretty weird. I hoped that he would just think nothing of it and not ask me a million questions. Or worse, get angry and decide it was punch Roxas time.

"What are you doing?"

A quiet, nervous laugh escaped my lips as I gestured towards my desk.

"Just trying to catch up on some homework…"

His eyes narrowed when I said that, but I didn't understand why.

"You didn't have a backpack with you when I picked you up?"

Why, oh why did today have to be the say he decided to be observant!?

"Uh yea, this is just make up work from—"

He didn't let me finish explaining. All of a sudden he was angry and yelling at the top of his lungs.

"Why the hell do you have make up work!? When did you miss school!? Why did you miss school!? What have you been up to!?"

_Shit!_

As far as my dad was aware I went to school every day. He was never here when the school called about my many absences, and he refused to go to conferences so he was oblivious to my dismal grades. I tried to think of a pathetic excuse that would appease him, but before I could say anything my phone started going off under my pillow. My heartbeat accelerated in panic. Now he was going to figure out that I had lied about my phone!

"What is that noise!? I thought you said you left your phone at your friends!?"

I glanced nervously between my bed and my dad, trying to think of something to say.

"Uh-Umm…I guess I must've left it here…That would explain why I missed all your calls…and stuff…"

I knew it wouldn't before the words were even out of my mouth, but I still thought it was worth a try. He wasn't buying it though.

"Bullshit Roxas! Bullshit! I would've heard it going off if it was in the house! You had your phone with you the whole time! Now what else are you lying about!? Give me your phone!"

I panicked and froze for a second, before walking slowly towards my bed. I hoped that it was one of my friends, he wouldn't be as mad if it was one of them. But somehow I just knew that it would be Axel. I slid my hand under my pillow and dragged my phone out. Sure enough, Axel's name was flashing on the screen as he waited for me to answer his call.

I glanced at my dad and then went to answer my phone, but my dad shook his head and extended his hand. I pleaded with him silently not to do this, but I couldn't argue with him. So I gave a resigned sigh as I placed my phone into his hand. He glared at me as he answered, as if he was daring me to say anything.

"I thought I told you to stay the hell away from my son! Did I not make myself clear!?"

I held my breath, wanting to hear everything that was said. Axel's end was quiet for a moment, clearly taken by surprise that my dad had answered. But he recovered quickly and responded in a level tone. I couldn't tell exactly what was said, but it sounded like an apology. I could be wrong though. My dad's face scrunched up in anger, and turned a reddish hue as he yelled back at whatever Axel had said.

"I don't care what you're fucking reasoning is, I want you to stay the hell away from my son! You're nothing to him!"

I gasped in surprised when my dad said that. How dare he speak for me! He had no idea what Axel was to me! Of course, I'd have to actually tell him what Axel was to me…but that wasn't the fucking point! He didn't know anything about me! Before Axel could respond in any way, my dad hung up and threw my phone at me. I flinched away as it flew at me and it hit me in the jaw before falling to the floor. My dad took a step towards me and I started to back away from him until he had me cornered against my bedroom wall.

"You fucking lied to me! And disobeyed me! I told you to stay away from him! He's an asshole and a prick and a bastard and I don't him anywhere near you! You are to have nothing to do with him! Do you understand!?"

Tears pricked my eyes as my dad bellowed in my face to never see Axel again. It felt like everything inside me was breaking. I was so used to obeying my father, that I automatically started to nod my head in consent. But then I stopped. I couldn't give Axel up!

"No!"

My dad's face became a mask of shock when I yelled back at him in defiance.

"You don't know anything about him! And you definitely don't know anything about me! He's the best thing that ever happened to me! I will see him whenever and how often I want! I don't care what you say or think anymore! You psychotic drunk! You have no business calling yourself a father! I fucking hate you!"

Once I started ranting and getting everything off of my chest, I just couldn't stop. Everything I'd ever thought or felt just came tumbling out of my mouth like word vomit. But once I was done speaking, and I was able to process what I had said, I was overcome with fear. I glared at my father defiantly, but I was terrified of the way he was looking at me. His face was an even deeper shade of red and the vein in his neck was throbbing erratically. He was staring at me with a murderous gaze, and even though I had nowhere else to go, I pushed myself even farther up against the wall.

I knew I had rendered him speechless, and any second now he was going to start wailing into me with his fists. So I clenched my eyes shut, turned my face away, and braced myself for the pain. He aimed a few kicks to my legs and sides, as if preparing me for what was to come. The first few punches to my stomach and chest made me grunt in pain, but they were tolerable. I'd felt a lot worse. Then he grunted my name in a hoarse whisper. Even though he hadn't said it, I knew that he wanted me to look at him. I whimpered silently as I turned to face him. His fist came flying at me. Pain exploded in face and I slid to the ground as I doubled over. I gingerly felt my face, checking to see if my nose was broken. I didn't think it was, but the warm liquid running down my lips and chin let me know that it was bleeding. I hoped it was over, but I knew that was too good to be true. He reached down to me and wrapped his hand around my throat, pulling me to my feet and then lifting me up to slam me back against the wall. My head cracked against the rough surface and my vision doubled momentarily. My dad tightened his grip on my throat as he growled into my face. I scratched at his hands, pleading silently for him to let go but it was useless.

"You will NEVER speak to me like that again!"

He pushed me farther up the wall before letting me go suddenly and I dropped to the floor in a huddled mess; gasping and wheezing for air. My dad threw me one last disgusted look before stalking out of my room; a few moments later I heard the front door slam shut.

I started crying and my face became a mess as blood mixed with snot and tears. I slowly dragged myself across my floor, and reached for my phone. I pressed redial, and waited anxiously for Axel to pick up. One agonizing moment later, his voice came through and relief washed over me.

"…Roxas…?"

He sounded unsure and slightly confused. He probably thought it was my dad calling back to yell at him some more. I nodded and then realized he couldn't see me.

"Y-yea…it's me…Can you come and get me?"

He breathed a sigh of relief and it made me smile a little. At least I could be sure that someone really cared about me. He hesitated for a moment before responding.

"Sure Roxas, but…what about your dad?"

I let out a harsh scoff when he asked that, I could care less about that asshole right now.

"He left…Just please come get me…"

"What happened? Are you hurt!?"

The lie slid off my tongue before I could even think about it, but Axel would see me soon enough so there was no point trying to hide it.

"No…maybe…yes…"

Axel let out a low growl and string of curses before uttering something that sounded like 'that fucking bastard!'

"Can you walk?"

I wasn't entirely sure. I felt alright, but there was a faint throbbing in my stomach that might make it difficult to walk all the way to Axel's. I slowly pushed myself into a sitting position and then used the bed for support as I pushed myself onto my feet. I wobbled a bit but managed to stay on my feet. I walked around my room a few times, testing myself out. Besides a dull pain that shot through my sides after every step, I felt okay.

"Roxas?"

"Sorry. I can walk, but it hurts a bit. It might take me a while to get to your place."

"No, don't worry about it Roxas. I'll borrow a car and be right there. Just sit tight, okay? Everything's gonna be alright."

If anyone else had said that I would've called bullshit. How could it ever be alright? It just didn't seem possible. But when Axel said it, I almost believed him. He said it with so much conviction it was hard to do anything but believe him. Axel wanted to stay on the one with me until he got her, but I convinced him that I'd be alright. Or more like I hung up before he could convince me otherwise. I wanted to get all my crying done before he got here.

At first I was gonna wait in my room, but I couldn't stand to be in there a second longer. So I retreated to the living room, but it was the same thing. Every room in the house made me feel like I was suffocating; horrible memories screamed at me from everywhere. Eventually I found myself crouched on the front porch. It was still hell, but at least I had never been hurt here. The cold night air cut through me, but I made myself endure it until finally Axel pulled up in an unfamiliar car. I didn't care whose it was though. I ran down the driveway and threw myself into the passenger seat despite the pain in my sides. I looked at Axel hungrily, as if I hadn't seen him in a long time. Had it really just been last night?

As soon as I saw Axel, everything really did feel like it was going to be okay. He just made me feel safe, worthwhile and loved. But then his face hardened into a mask of hatred and I backed myself up against the car door in fear. What had I done!?

"I am going to kill him! Look at what he's done to you babe…"

His gaze softened and he gently reached out and cupped my cheek. I understood now. When he looked at me he saw what my father had done, that was why he had gotten so angry. I relaxed into his touch and let the warmth of his hand comfort me. We sat there for a few moments longer before Axel shifted to drive and headed for his apartment.

I must've fallen asleep on the way, because the next thing I knew I was waking up on Axel's couch. My eyes fluttered open and I took in the texture of the ceiling. I groaned slightly as I registered how sore I was, but then I gasped in surprise as something wet touched my face. Axel was leaning over me, staring at me with concern as he wiped my face off with a damp washcloth. He smiled at me gently when I looked at him.

"Hey Roxy, how you feeling?"

The annoying nickname sparked my frustration, but when I looked into his worried eyes it disappeared just as quickly as it had come. I suddenly felt guilty for worrying him and wanted to prove that I was okay. I pushed myself up into a sitting position and leaned against the arm of the couch. I grimaced and gasped in pain as I did so, causing Axel to lean forward to help but I waved him off.

"Axel, I'm fine, really. Just a little sore."

He looked at me skeptically, clearly unconvinced.

"Well, you _don't_ look fine. I'm sorry babe, but you look like hell."

He smiled apologetically at me as I glared at him, hating his description. Still, I was curious. I brought my hand to my face and felt around gingerly. My nose hurt like a bitch and the skin underneath my left eye exploded in pain when I softly poked it.

"How bad is it?"

He looked me over quickly, shrugged his shoulders, and then started to wipe my face with the washcloth again.

"It looks worse than it is because you've got dried blood and snot on your face. But really, you just have a bruise under your eye. Once I get the blood off you'll have your perfect face again."

I blushed and ducked my head when he said that. Did he really just say my face was perfect? Was he blind!? I started to feel guilty again, starting to realize just how much trouble I had caused Axel. Tears pricked my eyes and I looked up at Axel pleadingly.

"A-Axel…I'm so sorry…"

His emerald eyes clouded with confusion when I said that. I didn't understand why.

"Sorry? For what Roxas? You haven't done anything wrong."

I hugged my legs to my chest and leaned my head back to stare at the ceiling, trying to fight back tears. What did he mean I hadn't done anything wrong? I was guilty of so many things…

"For everything! For coming into your life and causing you so many problems! For my dad being an asshole! For always running to you for help! F-f-for last night…"

He started shaking his head before I was even done talking.

"Roxas, I love you. I do, but you really are an idiot."

I gaped at him, totally taken aback by what he said. I hadn't been expecting him to say he loved me, and even though I was doing badly in school I wasn't stupid! Before I could think of something to say, Axel continued talking.

"You have nothing to apologize for. My life is so much better since you came into it, and you have not caused me any problems. You don't have to apologize about your dad. The way he acts is not your fault. If I wasn't willing to put up with him to be with you, then we wouldn't be sitting here. It makes me happy that you turn to me for help; it means you trust me and feel safe with me. I want you to always feel that way. And last night was my fault. I shouldn't have said anything unless I was sure you felt the same way…"

Axel was too kind to me. I wasn't used to someone caring about me so openly and unconditionally. He accepted the way things were instead of making me guilty about it like my friends did. I felt better than I had all day, but when he talked about last night my face crumpled.

"Axel…I'm sorry...Do you hate me…?"

His answer was a kiss. He kissed me softly at first and I kissed him back deeply and hungrily and a bit desperately, throwing my whole body into it. And as his lips moved against mine, every ounce of doubt I'd ever had slowly faded away. Suddenly it was very clear. Axel loved me and despite how scared I was of hurting him…I loved him too. I knew it, I'd always known but I was so used to people leaving him that I couldn't bring myself to admit it. But Axel wasn't going anymore so I had nothing to be scared of. He wrapped one of his arms around my waist and cradled my head against his chest with the other.

"Stop apologizing Roxas…I love you, I could never hate you."

"I'm sorry…I love you too Axel. I really do, I was just…scared…"

It was a pathetic excuse, but I had nothing else to say to explain myself. And Axel didn't question it. He just hugged me tighter and crashed his lips to mine.

* * *

><p>Hours later we were cuddled together on Axel's bed. I was slightly irked with Axel but at the same time I was the happiest I could ever remember.<p>

"Hmmm…I wish we could stay like this and never have to move…"

Axel tightened his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him. I was perfectly content to stay like this so I had no idea what he was talking about.

"What do you mean…?"

He chuckled and kissed the back of my head.

"Well, you have school tomorrow don't you?"

I grumbled under my breath and silently cursed Axel. There was no way I was going to school tomorrow.

"You really think I'm gonna be able to go to school, when I can't even walk because of you!?"

He chuckled that infuriating chuckle again and started to nuzzle and kiss my neck before whispering into my ear.

"I didn't hear you complaining earlier Roxas. You seemed to be enjoying it as you moaned and begged for more…"

My face flushed in embarrassment as his breath ghosted over my ear.

"Don't stay stuff like that! It's embarrassing!"

He pulled me even closer and continued to whisper in my ear.

"Really? Cause I thought you were unbearably sexy Roxy…"

I blushed even more and ducked my head.

"Perv…"

"Maybe…but regardless…you love me."

I smiled and nodded.

"Yea…I do…but that can easily change if you don't let me get some sleep!"

He had started nipping and sucking at my neck again and despite how good it felt, I needed some rest.

Axel chuckled again and kissed my head.

"Alright Roxy, get some sleep."

I yawned and cuddled deeper into his embrace as Axel started to run his fingers through my hair. The rhythmic motions and the sounds of Axel breathing were very soothing and within moments, I was drifting to sleep.

…_I love you Axel…_

* * *

><p><strong>Gah! So many things happened in this chapter and so many feels! This is like my favorite chapter so far! ! I really, REALLY hope that you guys enjoyed it! Cause this chapter is me and my beta's baby! We had so much fun working on it together! :3 Once again, I hope you enjoyed it! I have no idea when I'll be posting again, just know it'll be as soon as I can. Be patient with me please! <strong>

**It would be great for a flood of reviews to come in after you guys read this, but I'm not going to get my hopes up! No-siree-bob! Okay...We all know that's a lie...I just love reviews! **

**Anyways~~**

**Review please! :O)**


	21. Misunderstandings

Cornered 21

**Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me**

**AkuRoku**

**Everyone just sit down and listen before you shoot me, okay? I know it's been forever since I updated! I know I've broken promises to you guys over and over again! I'm sorry, so very very sorry. I could come up with so many excuses but really it's just been lack of motivation and being unsure of where to go next in this story of mine. I am still writing this and I don't care if it kills me, IT WILL BE FINISHED. I just don't when that will be, so please PLEASE be patient my lovely readers.**

**Without further ado, the next chapter of Cornered.**

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An annoying ringing sound broke through my haze of sleep and woke me up. I groaned and reached blindly for my phone, trying to shut it up. After a few moments of feeling around Axel's nightstand I managed to silence my phone, but in the process I had knocked just about everything else off. Axel groaned and pulled me tighter.

"What the hell are you doing…go back to sleep…"

I grinned and snuggled into his embrace.

"Sorry. My phone woke me up so I shut it off."

His body shook with silent laughter and he opened one eye to look at me.

"All you did was make an even bigger racket."

Axel sounded irritated but I knew he wasn't really mad. He had a playful grin on his face and he leaned his head down and placed a gentle kiss on my lips. It was then that I realized that we would be able to spend all day together. Neither of us had anything to do today. I had no intention of going to school, and I'm sure it wouldn't take much convincing to get Axel to stay here with me. Today was going to be perfect. Nothing would change that.

"Who was on the phone?"

I pouted in protest as Axel pulled his lips from mine. There was plenty of time to talk later, but right now I desperately wanted him.

"Don't know. Don't care. Just kiss me!"

I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself closer to him. He happily started kissing me again, but not for long. After a few minutes, he gently pulled away and started chuckling.

"Slow down babe. What's the rush?"

I glared at him but it didn't bother him at all. He just kept smiling at me. Which irritated me even more.

"You couldn't keep your hands off of me last night but now that I'm throwing myself at you, you don't want me!?"

I sounded pathetic and I was more than likely overreacting, but I felt like Axel was rejecting me and that hurt worse than any punch that my dad had ever thrown at me.

"Roxas…"

Axel's calm but stern voice pulled me out of my inner self pity.

"…don't even think that. That's not it at all. You know I want you."

Hearing that made me feel a little better, but I knew that something was going on.

"What is it then…?"

Axel heaved a heavy sigh as he averted his gaze and ran his fingers through his hair. I was dying to know what was going on in Axel's head but I told myself I had to be patient. We sat in silence for at least five minutes before he was ready to talk.

"Roxas…I just…"

He hesitated once again but by now my patience had run short.

"What Axel!? What is it!? Spit it out!"

Axel's green eyes snapped back to me in a frustrated glare. I flinched away, scared by his reaction, but then his face softened into a worried expression.

"Is this what you really want…?"

I was totally taken aback by that question. I just sat there, staring at him in confusion, unsure of how to respond. I waited for Axel to say something else, but he didn't. He just stared at me expectantly.

"W-what do you mean…?"

My voice came out shaky and breathless. I knew I had no reason to yet, but I was starting to panic. Did Axel not want to be with me anymore? Had I done something wrong? I mean I knew all along that I didn't deserve someone like Axel but he had said he loved me…and I loved him…I didn't know what I'd do if I lost him now…

"Roxas…"

Axel wrapped his arms around my waist and held me tight to him, as if I was about leave. But I wasn't going anywhere. Where would I go? I didn't want to be anywhere else. I just wanted to be here. With Axel. How could he not know that?

"Roxas, I know what you're thinking and it's not true. I promise. I love you. I just don't want you to do anything you don't want to do…I feel like I'm forcing you into something you're not ready for…"

Just a second ago I hadn't wanted to be anywhere but right here with Axel, but now…Now I wanted to be as far away from him as possible. I couldn't believe he had just said that. He thought that little of my feelings for him? He knew why it took me so long to admit to them. He knew why I pushed him away. But he also knew exactly how I felt the entire time. But _now_ he was going to doubt how I really felt? Now _he _was the one pushing _me _away. What the hell!?

"You know what Axel, just go fuck off!"

I pulled myself out of his grasp and pushed myself off the bed, determined to leave. I was so pissed at Axel, I just couldn't stand to be around him right now. I scanned the room for my clothes, but before I could limp my way over to them Axel grabbed my wrist and stopped me.

"Roxas wait! Just listen to me, please!? Let me explain!"

I yanked my arm away and rounded on him.

"I'm finally ready to be with you and now you're looking for a way to get rid of me! What is there to explain Axel!?"

He flinched and his face fell. I almost felt guilty for hurting him but he had hurt me more. I had every right to be mad at him. Axel opened his mouth to speak but before he could say anything my phone started ringing again. We both looked at it as it rang but I didn't move to answer it and neither did Axel.

The silence that filled the room and seeing Axel hurt had calmed me down a bit but I was still hurt and angry.

"Fine…Talk."

Axel breathed a sigh of relief when I said that and reached out for me, but I stepped away.

"You don't need to touch me to talk…"

Axel's face fell again but I forced myself to ignore how horrible it made me feel. He looked at me pleadingly until he realized I wasn't going to change my mind.

"Roxas, you pushed me away ever since we first met. Even before I started to have feelings for you. And once you realized how I felt it got even worse. No matter what I said or did you wanted nothing to do with me. Your dad hates me. He's forbidden you from ever being around me again. You're directly disobeying your only family to be with me. You're 17 and I'm 21. Of course I'm going to feel like I'm forcing you into a relationship with me…"

I was fuming with anger by the time he had finished. We'd talked about all of that and more. He knew! He knew all of that as soon he met me! But now it was too much!? I couldn't see straight. My vision blurred as tears of anger welled up and ran down my face.

"Roxas…No don't cry. Please don't cry babe."

He moved to get up and walk towards me but I took another step back.

"No! You knew! You knew all of that! If it's such a problem you should've thought about all of that before you made me feel the way I feel! If it's too much for you to handle you should've just ignored me when I ran into you on the street! I never wanted your pity you bastard!"

Axel stopped in his tracks as I yelled at him. He looked shocked at first but then his eyes glazed over with anger and he was glaring at me. I hated that he was looking at me like that, hated that I felt slightly scared of him and a violent sob racked its way through me. But I stood my ground. I was probably going to lose him now anyways. I would have to get used to him hating me.

Axel opened his mouth to retaliate and I braced myself for what he was going to say. He was going to break up with me, tell me he never wanted to see me again, kick me out of his apartment and out of his life for good. I'd never see him again. My life was going to revert back to how it was before I met him. It was going to go back to being a living hell. No, it was going to be even worse because now I didn't even have my friends to seek comfort in. I was truly alone now.

That thought terrified me and another sob racked through me. I wanted to take back everything I had said. I opened my mouth to do just that at the same time that Axel started to yell at me but before either of us could say anything my phone started ringing. Again. I was ready to throw the damn thing out the window!

"You should answer that…If they keep calling back its probably important…"

Axel's voice sounded tired and defeated. Guilt washed over me. I had done this to him. I could care less about who was calling me. All I wanted was to fix things between me and Axel.

"No. Just let it ring. I'll call them back later!"

"Dammit, Roxas just answer the dame phone!"

"No!"

"Fine! I'll answer it my fucking self!"

Axel stomped across the room and grabbed my phone off of the table. It pissed me off! He had no right to answer my phone for me!

"Hey! That's my phone! It's none of your busi—"

Axel ignored me and answered the call anyways.

"What!?"

I stopped in my tracks and flinched away from the anger in his voice. I figured it was either my dad or one of my friends calling to chew me out about yesterday. So before Axel could make the situation any worse I figured I might as well talk to whoever it was.

"Just give me the phone Axel…"

I held my hand out, expecting him to place my phone in my hand and storm out of the room. He didn't do either though. In fact, he looked…scared. His face looked ashen and pale and I started to get a really bad feeling.

"Axel…?"

He ignored me and turned around.

"Are you sure…?"

Okay now I was beyond pissed off! Not to mention confused! Who the hell was he talking to and why did he look so scared and why was he ignoring me!?

"Axel!"

He briefly glanced at me before turning his back to me again. He started nodding his head and saying a string of yeses before saying thank you and finally hanging up MY, may I repeat MY phone and turning back to me.

He had a weird expression on his face and he still looked oddly pale and scared.

"Okay, what the hell was that about!? Who was on the phone!? What the fuck is going on!?"

Axel acted like he couldn't even hear me, plopped down onto his bed and pinched the bridge of his nose. I waited, hoping he'd dignify me with a response but he just continued to sit there in silence. Eventually my anger faded and I began to worry.

"Axel…What's going on?"

I took a step forward, wanting to comfort him but hesitated, unsure if I should after our fight.

"Roxas…I'm sorry…"

"What for Axel…? What's happened?"

He pinched the bridge of his nose even harder for a moment, before looking up at me with a tortured expression on his face.

"I don't know how to tell you this babe…"

The tone of his voice sent a nervous chill down my spine. I didn't want to know what he had to tell me. I was scared to know. But like always curiosity won out.

"Tell me…"

My voice trembled slightly as I asked. Axel stared at me in silence for a few moments before answering.

"You said your dad was drinking last night right…?"

His question took me off guard. Why was he asking about my dad?

"Yea, but what does he have to do with this? Was he on the phone!? Did he threaten you again!? I just wish he'd get out of my life already! I hate him!"

I continued to rant about how much I despised my father, but suddenly Axel stood up with an angry expression on his face. I got scared and stopped talking abruptly, taking a step away from Axel.

"Don't say that stuff Roxas!"

I didn't understand why he looked so angry. My father had put me, and now Axel, through so much. He deserved so much more than me just talking shit about him.

"Why Axel!? You know what a bastard he is! You know what he's done to me! He's threatened you! Hurt you! Why are you defending him!? What the FUCK is going on?! Tell me! Now!"

I stared pleadingly at Axel, begging him to explain himself. Nothing was making sense anymore. If I was dreaming I desperately wanted to wake up. I wanted things back to normal. When Axel and I were happy together. When my dad was someone we both hated and wanted out of our lives. I wanted to erase the last hour and just redo the whole morning.

"Roxas, your dad is in the hospital. That's who was on the phone. They were calling to let you know that he had been in a car crash and that they were bringing him in. I'm sorry…"

Axel watched me carefully, gauging my reaction to the news. I had no reaction though. I couldn't process what he had told me. My dad? In a car crash? No way. He drove drunk all the time. There was no way he could be in the hospital. They had the wrong guy. They called me by mistake. I had nothing to worry about. Wait! Why the fuck was I worried? I hated my dad! I was just ranting about how much I despised him! I could look at my naked body in the mirror and remember how I got every single injury. But he was my dad! What if he was dying!? No! They had the wrong guy!

I was too confused. I didn't know what to think. I couldn't handle this. I sank to floor, clutching my knees to my chest. I could feel my heart pounding against my chest in panic. I could barely breathe. I was taking in short, shallow breaths. The lack of air was making me feel light headed and I felt like I might pass out.

"Roxas! You need to calm down!"

Axel knelt down beside me and pulled me against his chest. His warmth and smell slightly comforted me but I still couldn't get a hold of myself. I began to sob uncontrollably. I clung to Axel for support. He gently rubbed my back and whispered that everything was going to be okay over and over again.

"Shush…shush…it'll be alright Roxas. I promise. Shush babe…it's alright, I've got you."

I'm not sure how long we sat there, but eventually being in Axel's arms and he hearing his reassuring words managed to calm me down.

I pulled away slightly to wipe some snot off of my face and hiccupped quietly.

"Axel…can we go to the hospital…I wanna see him."

He hesitated for a moment, probably determining if I was up for it or not, before nodding his head.

"Sure Rox, if that's what you want."

I nodded, confirming it was indeed what I wanted. Axel helped me up off the ground. I was going to start looking for clothes but before I could step away from him, Axel pulled me into a bone-crushing hug. It took me a moment to respond but once again I was clinging to him as if my life depended on it. In a way, it really did. If my dad didn't make it…Axel was the only thing I had left.

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I hated fighting with Roxas. I knew it was kind of my fault and that I had hurt him, but why was it so damn hard for him to understand!? Why couldn't he get how much I cared about him and that the last thing I wanted to do was lose him? Okay yea sure I know he has self-esteem issues and that he thinks he doesn't deserve me or some shit but I've told him over and over again but he still refuses to believe it. He's so damn frustrating and stubborn! And if that damn phone doesn't stop ringing I will throw it out the window!

"You should answer that…If they keep calling back its probably important…"

I managed to keep my voice calm somehow. Despite how pissed I was I wanted to talk to talk to Roxas calmly. I was over all the yelling.

"No. Just let it ring. I'll call them back later!"

So much for no more yelling…

"Dammit, Roxas just answer the dame phone!"

"No!"

Once again. HE. IS. SO. DAMN. STUBBORN.

"Fine! I'll answer it my fucking self!"

I was pissed when I answered the call I'm surprised I didn't crack the screen a little. But with just a few words from the woman on the phone, all my anger evaporated and was replaced with fear. Roxas' dad was in the hospital. He had been driving drunk and got into a wreck. I had no idea what to do. I was transported back to the night that I found out my parents had been killed. I didn't want Roxas to go through that kind of pain. Again. He'd already lost his mom and he blamed himself. Despite what his dad put him through it would still hurt Roxas to lose him. No matter how much Roxas denied he cared about his dad.

And that's just what he did. As soon as I mentioned his dad he went into a rant about how much he hated him and despised him. How he wanted his dad out of his life for good. Not knowing that that wish may just come true tonight…So I told him what had happened. I saw all kinds of emotions swimming through Roxas' eyes. Denial, fear, guilt, worry, denial, and then some more guilt. Roxas always had to put the blame on himself. Watching Roxas breaking down was one of the hardest things I've ever had to watch. Before I could even register what I was doing, I was across the room and holding him in my arms, trying to offer whatever comfort I possibly could.

Eventually Roxas managed to calm down some. His relentless sobs had subsided to a few trickling tears and he pulled away to wipe away the snot that had gathered on his face, though most of it was on my chest. I knew that he would ask to go see his dad, but I'd give anything to just keep him here in my arms. If he nearly had an emotional breakdown just hearing about what happened to his dad, how would he take seeing him injured in a hospital bed? Worse, what if we got there and his dad was already dead? But I did the only thing I could do; I told him I would take him. How could I say no?

I helped Roxas up but before he could take even a single step away from me, I pulled him into another tight embrace. For just a moment I wanted it to just be me and him again, I needed him to know that I was here for him no matter what happened. Because after we walk out my door tonight, as much as I don't want it to be true, everything will change. No matter what ends up happening, the events of tonight will forever hang over whatever relationship Roxas and I have.

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**So I ask you guys not to shoot me and then I end with a cliffhanger like that…I KNOW I'M A HORRIBLE PERSON!**

**But I have already started writing chapter 22 and it's coming along nicely, I just need to make decisions and tweak some things. I'm not gonna promise anything cause I can never seem to keep to those promises. However, I feel like I'm going to be writing a lot this summer. I'm out of school and my boyfriend just left for basic training –insert sad crying face- so I'm going to have a lot of free time. **

**As always reviews are appreciated and if you've stuck with this entire time, I absolutely adore you. Have some cookies, or cake, or whatever else you like. And my amazing, wonderful, bootfiul beta deserves all the praise in the world for putting up with my horrible writing tendencies! **

**Also, if you wish to follow me on tumblr my URL is 1gurgi1 . tumblr .com**


	22. Hospital

Cornered 22

**Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me**

**AkuRoku**

**Yaaaaaaay! Another chapter! And I didn't make you guys wait for freaking ever like I did last time...Anyways, hope you enjoy! :)**

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We left no more than five minutes after Axel had gotten the call that my dad had been in an accident, but to me it felt like it had been hours. I still couldn't wrap my head around the fact that we were driving to the hospital. That it was MY dad we were going to see. I was still silently hoping that the EMT's had made a mistake at the scene. My dad was a monster, an invincible monster. Nothing could hurt him. He wouldn't let anything or anyone touch him if he could help it. So to think of my dad laying in a hospital bed and severely injured was nearly impossible for me.

What the hell was I supposed to do if it was my dad? I was serious about wanting to stay with Axel. I didn't know how I'd get my dad to agree but I really wanted to live with Axel. But that was before…whatever happened tonight. Until I saw my dad with my own two eyes, I was convinced nothing had happened. But IF it was my dad and WHEN he gets out of the hospital, how can I leave? If he's as hurt as Axel made it sound, he'll need someone to take care of him and I'm the only one he's got. And he's the only one I've got…Fuck what if I lose him? What if he dies? How the hell would I manage to be responsible for both my parents' deaths?

I just feel so cold and empty inside. Almost as if a cold blanket had wrapped itself around me, blocking out any kind of warmth. There's a lump in my throat from crying so much that just won't go away. I feel like I can't breathe, I can't speak. Like an invisible knife has cut through my spine, leaving me numb and helpless. I feel like I'm going to be sick, but I grit my teeth tight, refusing to let anything out. It leaves a cold, sticky feeling around me and in my mouth but I deal with it. My dad could possibly be dying; I could handle a little discomfort.

It felt like at any second my chest would cave in, like my whole being would be done for with a single breath. I get so scared that I start visibly shaking. I stuff my hands into my pockets and stay as still as possible, hoping that Axel won't notice. If he thinks I can't handle going he'll stop the car and turn around. I need to go. I need to know what happened.

"Roxas…?"

Axel's voice, laced with worry, pulled me out of my internal struggle.

"We're here."

Sure enough, the car had come to a stop. I didn't even know whose car we were in. That's how out of it I was while leaving Axel's apartment. There was only one thought on my mind. Dad. I looked out the window, taking in the building in front of us. Looking at it you'd have no idea of what horror awaited me within its walls. You'd never know of all the suffering and death that happens inside. I turned to Axel, fear rising up inside of me, pleading for a way out. He reached for my hand and squeezed it tight, and just that one simple gesture made me feel safe.

"Roxas, say the word and I will take you back home. We can come back later or tomorrow. We can just go back home and figure out what you want to do. You don't need to force yourself to do this. If you're not ready I understand. It's okay."

Only it wasn't okay. I wished I didn't have to go inside and face what had happened. I wished we could just leave and never come back. As much as I wanted to run in the opposite direction, I had to go inside. At least Axel was with me, I'm not sure if I could handle this on my own. I squeezed his hand back and slowly shook my hand.

"Let's just get this over with, okay?"

Axel hesitated. For a second I thought he was going to try to talk me out of it. I kind of hoped he would. I'd listen to him, I'd let him talk me out of going inside. But after a few seconds he nodded his head okay and my fate was sealed. I got out of the car, grabbed Axel's hand, not knowing what to expect, and we headed inside.

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The last time I had been inside the hospital had been when my mother died. I was too young then to really comprehend where I was or what was going on, but now I could. The automatic doors opened with a soft swoosh of air as Axel and I approached. We left behind the noise of the busy parking lot in exchange for the eerie quiet of the hospital lobby. I pulled my jacket tighter around me as the cold of the room wrapped itself around me.

Our footsteps quietly echoed as we walked across the hard marble floor. I quickly glanced around, taking in the pale, faded color on the walls. I'm sure it was supposed to have a calming effect on visitors but it wasn't working for me. My vision blurred as unwanted tears started to pool in my eyes. Images of my dad, broken and bloodied, kept swimming through my head. A slight pressure on my hand brought me back to reality. I looked up at Axel whose face was clouded with worry. I offered him a reassuring smile but I could see in his eyes that he saw right through it.

A few nurses were standing around the big information desk settled in the middle of the room. Off to the side of the desk stood a directory depicting the different wards of the hospital and what floors they could be located on. Soft dings announcing that the elevator had reached the main floor could be heard every few minutes off to left side of the room. My eyes roamed down the directory taking in all the different wards: Radiation, Pediatrics, ICU, and so on. It wasn't listed but I knew that below my feet in the basement was the morgue…Once again I was assaulted by a vision of my dad, this time lying pale and motionless on a metal table, never to breathe again.

"Can I help you?"

I looked away from the directory and my eyes roamed until they landed on who had spoken. A nurse with a kind face was standing behind the desk, staring at us with a questioning gaze. I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out. I wasn't sure what to say. Thankfully Axel came to my rescue.

"Yes, we got a call saying that his father was in a car accident last night. Can you tell us where to find him, please?"

Her eyes flickered from Axel's face and over to mine. I saw pity within them and I instantly just wanted to disappear. No matter how much I hated it, I always seemed to be pitied by the people around me. Tears pricked at my eyes once again and I resolutely turned my face away before she could see. Axel gave my hand a reassuring squeeze that I gratefully returned.

"I'm sorry to hear that. I'll look up what room he is in, I'll just need his last name?"

"Cohen, c-o-h-e-n."

There was a slight tremble in my voice as I spoke, fearing what she might say about his condition. Was I too late? Was he already dead? How badly hurt was he? Or was he perfectly okay? I heard the light tapping of the keys as she typed in my father's name.

"Ah, here we go. He's on the fifth floor in the ICU."

My breath hitched when she said he was in the ICU. Whatever had happened to him was life-threatening. I wrenched my hand out of Axel's grasp and gripped the edge of the information desk, staring at the nurse pleadingly.

"H-How is he? Is he going to be alright!?"

The nurse's eyes widened in surprise, but then she smiled at me and placed her hand on top of mine in a comforting gesture.

"I'm sorry, but I don't have any information about his current condition. The doctor in charge of his care will fill you in when you go up to see him. I promise you he is in good hands Mr. Cohen."

I wanted to yell at her and demand for more information but I took a steadying breathe and reminded myself that it wasn't her fault. I started to thank her but before I could a firm pressure landed on my shoulder and pulled me away from the reception desk.

"Thanks for your help, we'll be going now."

As we walked towards the bank of elevators, I stared up at Axel questioningly.

"What the hell was that about?"

He looked at me out of the corner of his eye and ran his fingers hurriedly through his hair before answering quietly.

"She touched your hand…"

I didn't understand why that was a problem at first, but after thinking about it for a few moments I realized why Axel had acted so weird. It was so ridiculous I couldn't help but let out a small laugh.

"Seriously? _That _made you jealous?"

Axel shifted his weight before reaching out and jamming the button to call for the elevator. He stared up at the display that showed the floor numbers, pointedly ignoring my question. But I wouldn't drop it, it was too ridiculous and I was momentarily distracted from why we were at the hospital in the first place.

"You're jealous because the nurse touched my hand? But it was crazy for me to be jealous of Larxene? Who, if you have forgotten, I had to watch kiss you?"

The corners of Axel's lips turned up into a small smile.

"That's because you _are_ crazy to be jealous of Larxene. She's like my sister and completely psycho."

I started to make some witty remark but right then the elevator pinged, announcing its arrival. We stepped inside and I reached a shaking hand forward to push the button for the fifth floor. I turned my head to stare into Axel's eyes. He looked calm and collected, but there was tightness around his eyes that let me know he was just as anxious as I was.

"There's one other problem with Larxene you keep managing to forget."

I looked up at Axel and raised an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah, and what's that?"

"She's not you, Roxas."

The way he looked at me when he said that made everything else fall away. I could almost delude myself into thinking we weren't in a hospital and my dad wasn't on the verge of death. It was just me and Axel and everything was okay. But all too soon the elevator came to a stop, a soft chime filled the air announcing we had finally arrived on the fifth floor and reality came crashing back down upon us.

The doors slid open with a soft whoosh of air, revealing a dimly lit hallway. We stepped into the hall and began walking to the glass wall at the end of the hallway. When we got there, there was a set of automatic doors labeled: Trauma Intensive-Care Unit. As we stood in front of the door, preparing ourselves, a nurse noticed us through the windows in the doors and came out to meet us.

"I'm sorry but this is a restricted area, can I help you?"

"My name's Roxas Cohen, my dad's in there. I want to see him!"

The nurse was older than the one downstairs, I'd say mid-forties. She had the air of a strict teacher look to her, her hair in tight bun and a look of annoyance etched upon her face. I expected her to say no and turn us away but then surprisingly her face softened into a caring smile, making her appear a lot younger.

"Of course you do, dear. Only immediate family is allowed inside though, I'm afraid your friend will have to wait until you're done."

A huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders; I was finally going to see my dad. But then panic swept in when she said that Axel couldn't go in with me.

"What? No! Wait, please…I don't want to be alone…"

The nurse smiled at me again and I was sure she'd make an exception for Axel.

"Oh sweetie, there's nothing to worry about. You won't be alone; there are plenty of doctors and nurses inside."

I was dumbfounded. She was a nurse! Surely she understood how difficult this was for people. How could she possibly think I'd be okay going through this alone?

"That's not what I mean…Please!"

I was going to continue to beg and plead but before I could Axel rested his strong hands on my shoulders. My mouth snapped shut with a quiet click and I turned to look at him. There was a sad look in his eyes but he was still smiling at me.

"It's okay Roxas, you'll be okay. I'll be right out here when you're done, okay?"

I shook my head stubbornly, but a small voice in my head was telling me to listen to him and eventually I gave a small nod. The nurse cleared her throat, drawing out attention back to her.

"Actually, it would be best if you were to go to the waiting room. We don't want visitors getting in the way. I'm sure you understand."

I wanted to snap at her that I was tired of hearing about all these policies but I held my tongue. Axel looked like he wanted to do the exact same thing, but he simply nodded at her with a tight smile.

"Wonderful, there's a small one at the other end of the hall and then there's the main one on the ground floor."

Axel continued to smile at her but the tightness around his eyes gave away how forced it was. He moved his hand from my shoulder to grab my hand and he guided me out of earshot of the nurse.

"Are you sure you'll be okay going in on your own Roxas?"

Axel's green eyes were filled with love and concern and it made a lump form in my throat. I wanted to tell him no. I wanted to beg him to carry me home. But how could I? If I told Axel how scared I was, I really didn't think he'd let me walk through those doors. But I HAD to see my dad. I had to see with my own eyes that it was indeed him; figure out if he was going to be okay or not. So I did what I do best, I hid what I was really feeling and gave Axel a reassuring smile.

"Yea Axel, I'll be fine. I've come this far, no point in turning back now."

I could tell he doubted me, it was a terrible lie, but he didn't push me on it. I started to pull away when a muffled ringing started coming from my pocket. An annoyed sigh came from behind us.

"No phones are allowed on this floor."

The nurse was really starting to annoy me and I was very tempted to throw my phone at her. Instead, I pulled my phone out and saw I had about a dozen missed calls and texts from my friends. I handed my phone to Axel.

"Here, call Sora and let him know what happened. Tell him I'll call him later, okay?"

Axel nodded and stuffed my phone into his pocket. I began to turn away, but before I could Axel pulled me into a tight hug, completely ignoring the nurse, and crashed his lips to mine. He whispered a quiet 'I love you' before letting go.

"I'll be downstairs Roxas."

Axel squeezed my hand before turning around to head back to the elevators. My heart contracted slightly as I watched him walk away.

"Come along Mr. Cohen, I'm sure your father will love that you're here to visit."

I wanted to scoff in disbelief, but I didn't. She placed one of her hands on my shoulder and guided me through the doors into the ICU. It's a small horse-shoe shaped room with about ten beds and a team of nurses. They all were constantly running around and reading computer printouts, displaying patients' vital signs. The smell of metal and bleach hit me, but there would never be enough bleach to cover up the stench of sickness and misery that pervaded the air.

The nurse led me down the row of beds until we stopped at who I assumed was my father. He was lying in a nest of tubes and wires; I could barely recognize his face through all of the gashes and bruises he had sustained. Despite all of that, he looked calm and serene laying there. I swallowed down the tears that were welling up and took a step closer to his bed.

"Talk to him, let him know you're here. Many are skeptical, but I really think a loved one's voice and presence can be really helpful to the healing process. Being here could really turn the odds in his favor."

I looked over at her as she checked my father's IV and vitals with a confused expression. I understood every word she had said, but I still didn't understand what she meant.

"What do you mean? He's just sleeping isn't he?"

She looked up from the charts in her hands and gave me a look I knew all too well: pity. Panic started to set in and I took a few deep breaths in attempt to calm myself down.

"You don't know, do you? Oh dear, I'm sorry to tell you this but your father suffered severe head trauma in the crash. He's in a coma sweetie."

I shook my head in denial and took a step back.

"A c-coma? But he's going to be alright, isn't he? He'll wake up right…?"

I stared at her pleadingly, hoping she'd tell me that of course he'd wake up. She didn't say anything though, just looked at me with a mixture of uncertainty and pity. She reached out as if to comfort me but I'd taken a step back. My heart was pounding erratically in my chest and I was ready to bolt, to run from this room and never come back.

But before I could, I heard slow quiet footsteps approaching from behind me and the nurses eyes traveled up and over my shoulder; a friendly smile making its way onto her face. I turned out of curiosity and found a tall man standing behind me, his white coat telling me he was a doctor. He smiled back at the nurse before looking down at me, a questioning look on his face.

"And who do we have here?"

He appeared rather young despite the gray streaked through his pale blonde hair, probably due to the stress of his job. He spoke with a soft, soothing voice but it had little effect on me. I was too scared. I heard the nurse step closer behind me, before resting her hand on my shoulder and giving it a comforting squeeze.

"Doctor Vexen, this is Roxas. Mr. Cohen's son...I think he's in shock."

I shrugged her hand off and took a step away from her, throwing her a glare over my shoulder before turning back to the doctor. I didn't need her to speak for me and I definitely didn't want her pity.

"What's wrong with my dad? Is he going to be alright!?"

Uncertainty flickered across his face, hesitating to answer my question.

"Is there someone else, someone _older_, I could talk to? Where's your mother?"

I knew that he didn't know any better, but I instantly hated him. I wanted to hurt him, but instead I started yelling, temporarily forgetting where I was.

"No! There's no one else! My mom's dead! It's just me and my dad! Now, what is wrong with him?"

My voice broke but I held my tears in, refusing to cry in front of him. Nurses around the room looked up with accusing glares at my sudden outburst but I didn't care. Doctor Vexen glared at me too but his was slightly terrifying.

"I'm sorry young man, but if you can't keep your temper in check I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

I stared down at my feet, suddenly feeling like a child. I wanted to tell him it was his fault but if he kicked me out I'd have to go through this all over again.

"Sorry…I'm just really worried…"

I heard him let out a low sigh before stepping forward and resting his hand on my shoulder.

"Let's go over here and talk."

I nodded but shrugged his hand away. I still didn't like him and I really didn't want him touching me. He guided me over to a few empty chairs in the back of the room. I chose the one that allowed me an unobstructed view of my dad. For some reason I thought that as long as I could see him he'd be alright. Vexen stared at me, studying me for a few moments before breaking the silence.

"First, I'm sorry about your mom. I wasn't aware."

I briefly glanced at him, waving his apology off, before looking back at my dad.

"Just answer my question."

I saw him shake his head out of the corner of my eye before opening a file I didn't realize he had been holding.

"Alright, as I'm sure you're aware your dad was in a car crash. He was heavily intoxicated, ran a red light and collided with a driver coming through the intersection. The other driver got away with a few cuts and bruises. Your father, however, wasn't as lucky as you can see."

I glared at him, wishing he'd skip over the obvious and tell me what I really wanted to know.

"What else is in that file? Gonna tell me the sky is blue and grass is green next? I _know_ what happened. What I don't know is why my dad is…is…like _that?" _

I motioned at him vaguely, unsure of how to describe what I was seeing. He looked up from his papers with another one of his scary glares.

"Your sarcasm is unappreciated. I'm getting to that part if you would just be patient."

I swallowed down a sharp retort before slumping back into the chair, waiting for him to go on.

"Your father is in grave condition Roxas-"

I flinched at his word choice. Grave condition, what the hell did that even mean? All I could picture was an actual gravesite, a headstone with my father's name on it.

"-He has a collapsed lung and has suffered from some internal bleeding and we're unsure of the origin. In a few hours we're going to take him into surgery, insert a tube to drain his collapsed lung and try to stanch what is causing the internal bleeding. However we are most concerned about the contusions on his brain…There isn't a lot we can do for that."

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to make sense of what he had just told me.

"So…what are all of those tubes and wires he's hooked up to doing?"

He stood up and motioned for me to follow him, walking back over to my dad. He started pointing out the individual machines and explained what they did. The tube down his throat is connected to a ventilator that is breathing for him. The tube in his nose is keeping his stomach empty. The one in his vein was hydrating him. Another was connected to his bladder and I really didn't need that one explained.

"And these on his chest are keeping track of his heartbeat and that there connected to his finger is checking his pulse. We're monitoring him all the time, checking for any kind of change. Good or bad."

I nodded, hearing what he was saying but not really taking it all in.

"And his brain? What's wrong with his brain? The nurse said he was in a coma?"

He nodded, pulling out and showing me a CAT scan of my father's brain but it didn't make much sense to me. I stared at him blankly, waiting for him to explain.

"The brain is a very fragile thing Roxas. Your father hit his head into the windshield during the crash, resulting in head trauma. That led to his brain swelling and pushing fluid up against his skull. That led to his brain pushing down and disrupting the part of the brain responsible for arousal and awareness. Thus, resulting in a coma."

I swallowed nervously, afraid to ask but needing an answer.

"So what does that mean? Is he going to wake up?"

Vexen shook his head, a trouble look on his face.

"I don't know Roxas, I honestly don't know. Think of it like your father's brain has gone on vacation and we're unsure of the return date. Comas are a tricky thing. They can last days, weeks, months, sometimes years. Other times…"

He didn't have to finish his sentence. I knew exactly what he meant. Other times they didn't wake up. I didn't want to face this. I didn't want to handle this. It's all too much and I needed for it all to stop. But nothing stops just because you think it should, just because you're lost. I took one last look at my father, ignored Doctor Vexen saying my name, and turned and ran from the room.

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I was pacing the waiting room downstairs, anxiety thrumming through me. Others were staring at me but I barely noticed. I was too worried about Roxas to care about anything else. I wanted to scream when that damn nurse told me I couldn't go in with Roxas. I hated that I was forced to let him go through that alone. I had to handle losing my parents by myself. No one should be forced to go through that alone. Especially not Roxas.

I knew him. I knew he was upstairs blaming himself, even though there was no way it could possibly be his fault. It was his asshole of a father's fault. He shouldn't have been drinking and driving. Besides, he deserved this for ever laying a hand on Roxas. I felt no shame in thinking that. Hell I was glad it had happened. I would never tell Roxas that though. Despite everything, he still loved his dad.

At least I wasn't alone in thinking that way. I had called Sora just like Roxas had asked, and after I had assured him that Roxas was okay he started berating Roxas' dad just like I had been doing ever since I had gotten the call. But we both agreed that if his dad died it would destroy Roxas. He was too young to be riddled with so much guilt over things that were out of his control.

I stopped pacing and plopped down into a chair, tapping my foot incessantly. I heard the ding of the elevator, and looked up hoping that Roxas would walk out of them. I thought I would be glad to see him but my heart wrenched upon seeing the tortured expression on his face. His eyes were bloodshot and I noticed the tear streaks on his face as he walked towards me.

I pushed myself out of the chair and pulled him to me, wanting to make all his pain disappear. His body was trembling as he clung to me; his sobs were muffled by my shirt. I held him tighter, almost afraid to ask.

"What happened Roxas?"

He shook his head and pulled away from me.

"…L-Later. Just take me h-home…please…"

I nodded and held him close to my side as we walked out of the hospital and back to the car, wishing we never had to come but knowing it was inevitable.

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The ride home was filled with a tense silence. I didn't want to talk about what I had found out about my dad and I knew Axel was dying to know but didn't push me to tell him. He held my hand the entire time, squeezing it to let me know he was there but I barely noticed, the doctor's words were still ringing through my head.

Now, we were back home and I was sitting on Axel's couch holding a pillow in my lap and fingering the fringe mindlessly. Axel came out of the kitchen with two mugs in his hands and handed one to me. I raised an eyebrow questioningly. He shrugged, looking a little unsure.

"Tea. It's supposed to be soothing, right? Or maybe that's just some bullshit Larxene's mom made up…Right. I'll just set it here then."

A small smile tugged at my lips. It was a rare sight to see Axel unsure of himself and it was quite entertaining. I shook my head and reached for a mug.

"No, tea's great. Thanks."

I took a small sip and surprisingly the warm liquid was sort of soothing. Axel just sat there watching me, which made me squirm uncomfortably. I glared at the distance between us on the couch and set my mug down before scooting closer and wrapping my arms around his waist.

"I'm not going to explode or anything. You don't have to be so careful around me. I'm fine, you know?"

He looked down at me with a disbelieving look on his face before wrapping his arms around me too.

"Okay, so I'm not fine but I will be fine Axel. It's just…a lot to take in."

He rested his chin on my head and started to rub my back in a comforting manner.

"I'm here for you babe. I'm just asking to know as much as you are comfortable with."

I nod and steady myself before I proceed to tell him everything the doctor had told me about my dad's condition. I had to stop a few times or else I would've started crying uncontrollably. But eventually I managed to tell Axel everything.

"So, know it's just wait and see I guess. There's not much else that can be done for him."

Axel nodded, a conflicted expression on his face. I cocked my head in confusion.

"What's wrong?"

He moved his arms and cups my face in his hands and touches his forehead to mine.

"Am I horrible, selfish bastard for being glad that it's him in the hospital instead of you?"

I thought about it for a moment before shrugging my shoulders.

"Probably but I feel the same way so it's okay."

I tried smiling at him but I had been holding back my tears for too long, and the tears started flowing relentlessly down my face.

I was ashamed for Axel to see me that way and I tried pulling away but instead Axel leaned forward, closing what little distance there was between us. I felt his hands in my hair and then he pulled me to him. He held me tight, his hand pushing my cheek against his shoulder as if he can keep me together… to keep me from shattering.

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><p><strong>First of all, I know absolutely nothing whatsoever about medical stuff! So I did research for this chapter, if any of it's wrong or slightly off I am sorry. I don't mind if you point it out but please be nice about it. I tried my best. <strong>

**Other than that I like how this chapter turned out. What about you guys? Like it? Hate? Opions please!**

**Please Review :O)**


	23. Chapter 23

Cornered 23

**Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me**

**AkuRoku**

**Hey guys! Happy AkuRoku day/month!**

**I know it's been a while since my last update and I really am sorry for that. I thought I'd be doing a lot of writing this summer but that just didn't happen. A lot of stuff was happening with me and I wasn't in the mood to write and then I was busy and then I wanted to write but just couldn't seem to get the words out and yada yada yada. Excuses, excuses, I know. **

**If you've put up with my infrequent activity and lame excuses this entire time and stuck with this story through all of my hiatuses I am so truly thankful. Seriously, you guys are the best readers anyone could ask for. I feel like I owe you guys hugs and cookies and ice cream and a plethora of other goodies to show my appreciation. But all I have to offer is this long awaited chapter. **

**So I hope you enjoy!**

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Watching Roxas break down like that nearly killed me. Having to watch the one you love suffer, and not being able to do a damn thing about it is the worst kind of torture. Sure I could hold him and tell him that everything would be okay, but I couldn't give him what he really needed. I couldn't heal his dad. Not that I really wanted to, but if it made Roxas happy…well I'd do anything if it made Roxas happy.

It still shocked me how much he meant to me when I'd only known him for a month. Wow, had it really only been a month? We'd been through so much and he meant the world to me; I felt like I'd known him forever. And I planned on knowing him forever too. There was no way I could let him go now.

I tightened my arms around Roxas' sleeping form and nuzzled my face into his hair, breathing in his familiar scent. He'd ended up crying himself to sleep in my arms and, carefully so as not to wake him up, I'd carried him from the couch to my bed so that we could sleep comfortably. But I had yet to fall asleep. I was too wound up and worried about Roxas. Plus, Roxas kept twitching and mumbling in his sleep. I held him tighter and whispered soft reassurances every time, but it had little effect.

Finally, around 3 in the morning, Roxas had calmed down and was sleeping soundlessly. I shut my eyes and tried falling asleep but of course that's when I realized how thirsty I was. I tried ignoring it, really wanting to sleep and really reluctant to leave Roxas but the more I ignored it the worse it got. I'd only be gone a few minutes; he'd never know I was gone. So with a resigned sigh, I slowly snaked my arm off of Roxas' waist and got out of bed.

As I was walking across my room, my phone started going off in my pocket. I jumped out of surprise before digging my phone out. I hurriedly left my room, groaning internally at the name on the screen, before answering my phone.

"It's 3 in the morning Larx! What the hell could you possibly want?"

I heard Larxene giggling, along with loud music and shouting in the background.

"Axie, baby! I misssss youuu."

I rolled my eyes in annoyance, already regretting answering my phone.

"You're drunk, Larx."

She let out a shrill laugh that made me pull my phone away from my ear.

"What? Noooo! I've only had 2…6 drinks. I'm _completely_ sober. I promise! And I'm totally not crossing my fingers if _that's_ what you're thinking."

I shook my head as I walked into my kitchen, rummaging through my cabinets for a clean glass.

"You're completely hammered. Where are you?"

Finally finding a clean glass, I turned the faucet on and waited for the water to get cold enough.

"Fiiiiiiine, don't believe me! I'm at Dem-Dem's! He's having a party!"

She made it sound like the most interesting thing ever. However, the fact that I didn't know Demyx was throwing a party kind of stung. I filled my glass up and took a sip before replying.

"Why wasn't I invited, huh?"

I heard her shouting at someone that she was talking to me before answering my question.

"Ummmmm, that's probably cause you've been spending soooooo much time with that cutie of yours. Duh! You knooooow, he's really not as bad as I thought! We talked and you like totally deserve him Axie. I want you to be happy and I can tell he makes you happy! So he's a-okay in my book! You can come to the next party! And bring your cutie too!"

I was taken aback by her sudden honesty. Note to self: next time I wanna know what Larx really thinks, get her drunk. I was trying to think of something to say, but before I could there was a faint voice asking her to dance.

"Omigod! Axie! You should see the total hottie that wants to dance with me! Gotta go! Love yaaaa!"

"Larx, wait! Be careful! And don't drive home!"

"Fine spoil sport! Dem-Dem already took my keys anyways!"

And with that, she hung up. I stared at my phone with a bemused expression before shaking my head and stuffing it back into my pocket. I started to lean back against the kitchen counter, planning on finishing my water and then heading back to bed. But before I could, a shout came from my bedroom, making me drop my glass.

"AXEL!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Dead, accusing eyes staring at me caused me to jolt awake, sweaty and tangled up in the sheets. I was thrashing around, trying to get my limbs loose, when my nightmare came rushing back to me. Cold fear gripped me and I rolled over to curl into Axel's side, seeking his comforting warmth. Only, he wasn't there. Not bothering to think logically about why he wasn't there, the terror of my nightmare still fresh, I panicked.

"AXEL!"

A second of silence followed by the sound of glass shattering on the floor, Axel cursing, and then his feet hitting the floor as he ran back to the room. He threw the door open, worry and fear etched on his face. His crossed the room in two easy strides and plopped down onto the bed before gathering me into his arms. I clung to him and noticed that he was slightly trembling.

"You scared the hell out of me babe…Are you okay?"

I shook my head, clinging to him even tighter.

"I had a nightmare…and when I woke up….you were gone. You were gone…."

My voice cracked a bit and I knew I was close to tears. I didn't see how it was possible for me to cry anymore after how much crying I'd done yesterday but apparently it was.

Axel held me tighter, moving slightly to kiss the side of my head.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry…I'm here now, I'm always here Roxas."

We held each other like that until my fear subsided and my heart quieted down to a normal pace. I loosened my grip on him and pulled away slightly, but just enough so that I could see his face. He reached his hand up to swoop my hair out of my face and the corner of his lips pulled into a smile as he looked down at me.

"You okay now?"

I thought the question over, not sure how to answer. I was far from okay, but I didn't want Axel to worry about me too much. At the same time, I was tired of putting on a mask and acting like everything was okay when it wasn't. I was tired of bottling everything up until I felt like I was going to explode. A deep sigh left my lips as I shook my head.

"No, not really."

He nodded in understanding and started rubbing comforting circles into the small of my back.

"Your nightmare?"

I nodded, leaning into him again and nuzzling my face into his chest. I felt his chin rest on the top of my head.

"Wanna talk about it?"

I nodded and took a moment to gather my thoughts before speaking. I told him how it had started out with me in the ICU just looking at my dad, but then his heart had flat lined and the next thing I knew I was in the morgue looking at my father's dead body. How cold and empty I felt because he was dead, but also slightly happy that I was finally free. But then his mouth opened and started shouting that it was my fault. And then his eyes opened and I couldn't look away from his dead and accusing gaze. I was paralyzed with guilt and that's when I woke up. Afraid and alone.

"I just can't get his eyes out of my head…the way he was looking at me…I just feel so guilty Axel!"

I shuddered, a violent sob working its way up my throat. I started to wipe furiously at my eyes, trying so hard not to cry. Axel gently moved my hands away before taking my face between his hands.

"Roxas, listen to me, you have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about! It was an accident, a mistake. It could've easily happened even if you guys hadn't fought that night. It was just bad timing. If anyone's at fault it's your dad. He shouldn't have been driving while he was drunk. There was nothing you could do about it! Believe me!"

I shut my eyes, finally letting the tears run free. I wanted to believe him so badly but I just couldn't.

"I've wished him dead so many times Axel…I hate him and I can never forgive him…I want him to die but I don't want to be alone…he's my _dad_..."

I was choking out sobs, unable to keep them under control. Axel pulled me into a crushing embrace again, whispering fervently into my ear.

"Oh babe…Shush, shush. It's okay…Everything's going to be okay."

The conviction in his voice was so strong that I almost believed him. I nodded, not wanting to talk about it anymore. It was something that we would just have to agree to disagree on.

"And Roxas, you'll never be alone. You've got me and your friends. We love you and we're not going anywhere. Even if you wanted us to, we're just that stubborn."

I couldn't help but chuckle at that. He was right; they were all too stubborn for their own good. Axel pulled back to smile at me before scrunching his face up in mock disgust.

"Your face is covered in snot. So not attractive."

I glared at him as he laughed and reached over to procure a tissue from his bedside table. He proceeded to wipe my face off despite my protests that I could do it myself. Once he was done, he leaned forward and gently kissed me; managing to erase all my irritation and worry. I wanted to keep kissing Axel, it was a much needed distraction and just felt so damn good, but Axel pulled away and let out a big yawn.

"Sorry, I haven't really slept yet."

He gave a sheepish shrug as he smiled apologetically at me. My brows knitted together in confusion.

"At all? Why?"

He shrugged again before lying down on his side and pulling me with him, curling around me with his chest against my back and bringing his arm around my waist.

"Too wound up after yesterday, I guess. Plus you were mumbling in your sleep."

I instantly felt bad, a new wave of guilt washing over me.

"I'm sorry…"

He chuckled before gently kissing the back of my head.

"It's fine Roxie."

I jerked my head back a bit in retaliation to the unwanted nickname, earning another round of chuckles from him. He buried his head into the crook of my neck and tightened his hold on me. We lay in there in silence for a bit, not needing to say anything, completely at ease with each other. My eyes were dropping shut as sleep started to reclaim me. Axel's breathing had slowed so I knew he was almost asleep too.

"Axel"

"Hmm?"

"Don't go anywhere, okay?"

"No worries, too tired to move."

"No, I mean-"

"I know what you mean Roxas, I'm not going anywhere."

Satisfied with his answer, I told him one last thing before falling asleep.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXX

I was slumped on my couch, flipping through the TV channels, and glaring at all the crap that kept showing up on the screen. I was bored. Completely and utterly bored. Roxas was gone; he'd left a few hours before to visit his dad at the hospital. I'd wanted to go with him but I'd had to go into work. So I gave Roxas my key, making a mental note to make a copy for him, and headed to work while he headed to the hospital.

Only for my boss to let me go early…The one day I really needed the distraction of work, my boss turns into a saint and sends me home early saying, 'You work too hard Axel! You need a break!' Never bothered him before how hard he worked me and everyone else. Though I did have to admit it was nice to come home from work without my back aching from moving furniture all day.

I gave up on finding something good on TV and threw the remote onto the coffee table, groaning as I layed down and rested my head against the arm of the couch. I was tempted to call Roxas but I knew he couldn't answer while he was visiting his dad. I could've called Larxene but I didn't feel like catering to her while she recovered from her hang over. That also ruled out all my other friends since they were all at Demyx's party last night and had probably gotten just as drunk as her.

With a groan I rolled over onto my stomach and buried my head into the couch. Maybe I'd take a nap; I was still pretty tired seeing has how I had only gotten like fours of sleep last night. Or I could kill an hour shopping. There was next to no food left in the apartment and I really needed to stock up. Before I could make my mind up; my phone vibrated, announcing a text.

**Hey Axel. Just left hosptl, headin home. How's wrk goin?**

I couldn't help but smile and jump off of the couch in excitement. I quickly typed up a reply before heading to the bathroom to clean up a bit.

**Booooring. My boss sent me home erly tho! Hurry home! :)**

I still had around 20 minutes before Roxas was here. Once again, I was bored. I pulled my phone out and stared at his text, as if that would somehow make him get here faster. My lips pulled up into a grin. He had called my apartment _his home._ I mean sure, I could be reading too much into it but it made me happy all the same. We hadn't been dating long but I wanted him to move in with me. I loved falling asleep with him in my arms and I loved waking up to his face. It was hardly the right time though, not with his dad in the hospital.

While I was silently musing over how long I should wait before seriously asking him to move in, time managed to pass rather quickly. Next thing I knew, I heard light footsteps on the stairs outside and then the front door was being pushed open. Once he had the door shut behind him he looked up and smiled at me.

"Hey."

I had been really nervous about Roxas going to the hospital by himself, especially after how hard it was on him yesterday. But he seemed perfectly okay and worry was replaced with relief as I crossed the room and kissed him in greeting.

"Hey, so how was your dad?"

He stepped around me as he shrugged his jacket off and threw it over the couch.

"No change. No better, no worse. Just the same as yesterday. He's strong though, I'm sure he'll pull through. He's too stubborn not to. Is there nothing to eat in here? We really need to go to the store soon."

I raised my eyebrow in question at his nonchalance. Roxas gave up on rummaging through the cabinets for something to eat before walking back over to me. I wrapped my arms around his waist before pushing him up against the back of the couch.

"Someone's being strangely optimistic? Don't get me wrong, it's good. Just not really like you. Plus, it's understandable for you to be worried."

Roxas shrugged his shoulders before wrapping his arms around my neck.

"Well, I thought a lot about what you said last night. Or this morning, however you wanna think of it. You're right. I've got you, Sora, Riku, Kairi, and Namine. No matter what I'm gonna be taken care of, whether I want to be or not. Don't get me wrong, I am worried about my dad…really, really worried, but I can't help point out how much easier and happier I'd be if he was out of my life. Either way, things will manage to work out."

I really wanted to believe that Roxas was as okay as he said, but after how upset and guilty he'd felt this morning I just couldn't. I tried to keep my doubts off of my face though, not wanting to push Roxas. Sure I wanted him to confide in me, but I could wait. He'd talk when he was ready.

"You're sure your okay?"

Okay, so old habits die hard. But at least I didn't call him on his lie. He smiled and nodded.

"Yea, well as okay as I can be all things considered. Really Axel, I'm managing. Now enough talking, kiss me."

More than eager to do just that, I pushed my concerns away and focused on how soft Roxas' lips were and how much I loved him.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I hated lying to Axel, I really did. But I was tired of worrying everyone around me and feeling like a burden. So I'd keep my worries and problems to myself for a while. I just wanted to enjoy being happy with Axel and not have to worry about anything else. His kiss left me breathless and eager for more. Axel was on the same page and we started to make our way towards the bedroom.

But before we could even make it through the bedroom door, my phone started going off. Axel released my lips reluctantly as I dug my phone out of my pocket. I groaned in frustration as I read the text from Sora. Axel touched his forehead to mine as he tried to regain control of his breathing.

"What is it…?"

"Apparently Sora and others think they need to check up on me…They are on their way over here."

Axel groaned as well.

"Now? Can't you tell them to wait till later?"

I shook my head regretfully.

"I wish! They'd never listen."

Axel chuckled before pecking my lips and pulling away.

"Hmm sounds like you really want it Roxie?"

He waggled his eyebrows at me in a suggestive manner. I felt a blush making its way across my face. I turned away before he could see and texted Sora back. I mumbled a 'maybe' under my breath, and from Axel's chuckle I'm sure he heard me.

"So, I get to meet your friends huh? Should I be nervous?"

I shrugged, thinking over his question.

"Well technically you've already met Namine, but that doesn't really count. I'm not really sure how to prepare you. My friends can be…what's the word…Overprotective? Intimidating? Moronic? Idiotic? Loud? Obnoxious? Annoying? Unpredictable? Need I go on?"

Axel chuckled and nodded as I finished my overindulged, yet very accurate, description of my friends.

"Ah, so 4 Larxene's then? How the hell do you handle that? I can barely handle one!"

I rolled my eyes as I laughed, though he had a good point. I was pretty sure the girls would get along very well with Larxene. Though, thinking of the three of them together was kinda scary.

"Practice I guess? I'm more than used to it. Though it is hard to handle sometimes. Gotta love them though."

A smile spread across my face as I thought about how much they meant to me. Sure, things had been really rocky lately but they were always there. They had always been there. I'm not sure where I'd be without them. Hell, without their pushing I doubt I'd be with Axel. I better thank them for that.

"So, they know where I live?"

I looked and nodded, rubbing my neck nervously.

"Uh, yea, sorry about that. Sora kinda forced it out of me. You know, in case you were a psycho killer or just a jerk or something. If I disappeared he wanted to know where to find me so he could come to my rescue. I told him he had nothing to worry about but he was adamant."

I knew Axel wasn't upset or mad about me telling Sora, but still I started rambling feeling like I owed him an explanation. He chuckled as he shook his head at me.

"Relax babe, its fine. I was just curious. I like that they take care of you, though I do have to be careful. One wrong move and they'll be beating down my door."

He laughed at his own joke, and I started to tell him that was something they'd really do but before I could, a few knocks came from the front door. Axel winked at me before turning to answer the door. He barely had the door open before a brown blur came running at me.

"Roxas! Are you okay!? God, I was so worried about you! And what's with you having him call me instead of calling me yourself!? Talk about an anxiety attack!"

I smiled at Sora before looking up at Axel's bemused expression at Sora's behavior. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Hey! Why are you laughing? This isn't funny Roxas!"

That made me laugh even harder, which only made Sora even more annoyed. He opened his mouth to yell some more but I silenced him with my hand.

"Sora! Breathe! I'm fine! Now, I'm going to take my hand away but only if you promise to calm down, okay?"

He glared at me but after a moment he conceded and nodded his head in affirmation. He threw himself at me in a hug after I moved my hand off his mouth.

"You have to stop worrying us like this bud."

I returned the hug, whispering a quiet apology, before looking up at Axel and my friends as they watched the exchange. It struck me as weird that Namine was hanging back behind everyone else, looking uncharacteristically nervous. I shoved my hands in my pocket, not liking how I was suddenly the center of attention.

"Uh, hey guys."

Riku nodded at me and gave a small wave, Kairi smiled at me, while Namine barely looked at me. I didn't know what to think of her behavior. Was she still mad at me? I sure hoped not, I really didn't want to have to deal with that on top of everything else.

My attention focused back onto Kairi as she crossed the room and wrapped me into a tight hug, before pulling back at staring at me with concern.

"Are you _really_ okay Roxas? What's wrong with your dad?"

I smiled at her reassuringly as I pulled away.

"Yea, Kai, I'm fine. My dad's in a coma, but I'll fill everyone in on that in a bit okay?"

I motioned my head towards Namine and she nodded in understanding, though she looked even more concerned now after hearing about my dad. She looked back at Namine before turning back to me with a guilty look on her face.

"We uh…well we all kinda ganged up on her after you left last time. She was really pissed, but now she just feels really guilty. I think she's nervous you won't forgive her. I've told her how ridiculous that is but still-"

I saw Namine's head snap up as she heard what Kairi was saying, I smiled at the fact that her usual fire was dancing in her blue eyes. I was starting to really worry after what Kairi said but looking at her now I knew she'd be just fine.

"I can totally hear you, you know? I mean damn! Let me speak for myself, thank you!"

Kairi blushed guilty, before motioning for Riku and Sora to follow her over to the couch. Axel did the same, winking at me as he passed, while Namine walked up to me. She looked a tad nervous again but at least she was acting like herself now. I opened my arms a bit, quietly asking for a hug. She looked at me with a doubtful expression.

"You sure you wanna hug me? I'm a selfish bitch after all…"

I rolled my eyes before pulling her into a hug.

"You're not a selfish bitch Nams. I know you didn't mean it."

She hesitated a moment before returning my hug.

"I'm sorry Rox, I really am. You know you can always come to us. We'll listen and help as much as we can."

She pulled away and threw an amused look my way before heading over to sit next to Kairi.

"But at this rate I'm gonna turn into a therapist. Kind of an issue seeing as how I'm already into that art school."

She made it sound like no big deal but you couldn't miss the excited gleam in her eyes. I quietly laughed at the sudden change in her as I followed her and plopped down next to Axel. He smiled at me and threw his arm over my shoulders, pulling me closer to his side. I got a tad nervous again because all of my friends were staring at me again. I cleared my throat, ready to get the introductions out of the way.

"Uh, okay, so this is Axel obviously. The hyper-active brunette is Sora, and that's his boyfriend Riku. And the girls are Namine and Kairi."

Everyone waved and smiled at the mention of their names. My friends were still staring at me expectantly, all of them looking very concerned. I groaned and glared at them all.

"Guys, I'm fine! Stop looking at me like that!"

Namine leaned forward and glared right back.

"Cut the crap Roxas! You are totally _not_ fine. We know you better than that. Now spill! What happened with your dad?"

I groaned again and let my head fall back onto Axel's shoulder. I considered refusing to tell them, but I knew they'd end up forcing it out of me eventually. Better now than later. Besides, I did owe them an explanation after having Axel call Sora yesterday. So I told them about fighting with my dad and how he left the house drunk. How he got into a wreck and was taken to the hospital. I spared them the details of everything that was wrong with him and just said that he was in coma and there wasn't much else the doctor's could do now. I somehow managed to keep my voice even and calm, trying to prove that I really was as okay as I was acting.

"So yea, that's what the past few days have consisted of. I went to the hospital this morning; no change. But before you guys freak out, I'm fine! I promise. Yea, I'm worried and want him to pull through and all but if he doesn't it's not like my worlds gonna end or anything. You guys won't let it."

There, that sounded believable didn't it? I sure hoped so. I wanted to put their minds at ease so they'd stop fussing over me. I mean Axel had believed me hadn't he? Then again he didn't know me as well as the others.

"Bull. Cut the act Roxas, you're not fooling anyone."

I looked over at Riku, wanting to throttle him for not letting my lie slip. However, I didn't let it phase me. I shrugged and grinned at him.

"Okay, so maybe I'm a tad more worried then I'm letting on. But worrying and freaking out isn't going to help anything so why show it? It's not like he deserves any compassion anyways. Everything will be okay, I'm sure of it."

They all seemed shocked by that response. But they all seemed satisfied with that answer and let it go. Well, all besides Namine.

"Who the hell are you and what have you done with Roxas?"

She raised her eyebrow at me before placing a questioning gaze on Axel. He chuckled and shook his head.

"Don't look at me; I've got nothing to do with it. I'm just as shocked as you are."

I looked up at him in surprise. I guess he hadn't believed me then? I guess Axel was right. I was a horrible actor. He looked down at me apologetically and whispered quietly so only I would hear.

"Sorry, but you really are a horrible liar babe."

Great, now he could tell what I was thinking. That's exactly what I needed. I pouted, feeling rather annoyed, but he quickly erased that annoyance as he kissed me. He made it so hard to stay mad at him. We broke apart and started laughing as Sora started yelling excitedly.

"Quick! Someone take a picture! We need documented proof of this!"

Everyone laughed thinking he was joking, but then he quickly dug out his phone and pointed it at me and Axel.

"Go on! Do it again!"

I glared at him and shook my head.

"No Sora, that's just weird. If we want pictures we'll take them ourselves. Put your phone away."

He whined and pouted as he reluctantly shoved his phone back into his pocket. I stuck my tongue out at him and he flipped me off in retaliation. I then noticed that Namine and Kairi were whispering to each other and not really paying attention to us.

"What are you two scheming about over there?"

They grinned at each other before chiming together in perfect unison.

"Nothing!"

I grimaced, not liking the sound of that at all.

"Sora, should we be scared? I'm feeling kinda scared right now."

"Very scared, Roxas, very very scared."

Namine rolled her eyes as she pushed herself off the arm of the couch and strutted over to the kitchen.

"Oh don't get your panties in bunch. We were just saying how dreadful it is that we are now the 5th and 6th wheel. Not that we aren't happy for you Roxas, we totally are. But I mean what I need to do to get some nice guy to pay me any mind, huh?"

She meant it as a rhetorical question but Sora, Riku and I decided to answer anyways.

"Don't intimidate every guy you meet?"

"Get a personality transplant?"

"Stop being evil?"

She blatantly ignored us as she started rummaging through Axel's fridge.

"Geez! How do you guys live? There's like no food in here!"

I pointedly stared at Axel and he looked away sheepishly.

"I know! I just hate shopping okay? Look, why don't we run over to the convenience store and we can buy some snacks? Come back and put on a movie? How's that sound?"

Everyone voiced their agreement and few minutes later we were all filing out of Axel's apartment.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Every sort of junk food that existed had to have been dumped onto Axel's kitchen table when we got back. The question wasn't what had we bought, but what _hadn't_ we bought? The girls went chocolate and cookie crazy, Axel insisted on getting some strange flavor of ice cream I'd never heard of before, Sora needed to have his Oreo's and sour patch kids, Riku wanted his usual bag of Dill Pickle chips (I mean come on, gross right?), and me well I was happy with a bag of pretzel's. Though I'd end up having a little of everyone's stash, besides those nasty chips. And of course, popcorn. Lot's and lot's of popcorn.

Sora and I were standing in the kitchen, pouring the myriad of snacks into bowls as we waited for all the popcorn to pop. Riku and Axel were sitting on the floor in front of Axel's movie collection and were debating on what movies to watch, while the girls were debating on whether to order a pizza or not, as if we didn't have enough food already.

As if he could read my mind, Axel looked up at Namine with an evil smirk on his face.

"Sure you wanna do that ladies? You might get…_fat!"_

He made it sound like the biggest catastrophe that could happen and they both looked horribly affronted. Riku chuckled and gave Axel a fist bump before going back to perusing the movies. I couldn't help but laugh at their expressions as the girls plopped down on the couch and started pouting. They both glared at me when they realized I was laughing at them.

"He's fitting in nicely, isn't he?"

I looked over at Sora, who was nodding in Axel's direction. I nodded in agreement. I was really glad that everyone was getting along with him so well. I didn't want to have to choose when to spend my time with Axel and when to spend my time with my friends. I wanted to spend my time with them together and it looked like I was going to get my wish.

"It's kinda hard not to like Axel though."

The microwave beeped, signaling another bag of popcorn was done. I starting nibbling on a pretzel as Sora pulled the bag out and dumped it into another empty bowl.

"You tried pretty hard, failed miserably though."

I rolled my eyes and softly hit his arm.

"Oh shut up, I was young and stupid then."

He threw another bag of popcorn into the microwave and started it.

"I like him Rox, he's good for you. You two go well together. The way he looks at you…well, I know you're in good hands. And I'm sorry to break it to ya bud, but you're still young and stupid."

I rolled my eyes as I leaned back against the kitchen counter, gazing fondly at Axel.

"Thanks, cause I was soooooo seeking your approval. You're the one that forced us together in the first place, did you forget that little detail?"

He looked at me with an innocent 'who me?' expression before motioning for me to hand him the last bag of unpopped popcorn.

"Seriously though, thanks. I _was_ being stupid. I don't know what I was thinking. I…I love him Sor."

A moment of silence and then I heard the bowl he was holding clatter as it hit the counter. I looked over at him to see him gaping at me. I couldn't tell if he was going hug me in excitement or cry. Neither happened. Instead, he ran past me and fell onto Riku.

"Riku! Our little flower's all grown up and in love! Can you believe it?"

I was left speechless. My face probably looked like a tomato with how much I blushed. Geez, did Sora have to announce it to the whole world? Not that I really minded anyone in the room knowing but still. And what was that 'little flower' bullshit? Making it even worse, the girls started waggling their eyebrows at me and then proceeded to act like they were swooning before falling into a fit of giggles. My embarrassment died a little a little when I saw the amusement in Axel's eyes though. As long as he didn't mind I was fine. He noticed me staring and beckoned for me to come over to him.

So I walked across the room and tucked my legs beneath me as I sat on the floor next to him. He winked at me and I smiled in return, humiliated that it still gave me butterflies when he did that. Would I ever get used to the effect he had on me?

"Hey, talking about me huh?"

I nodded and started shifting through the movies that were laying in front of us on the floor, heaving a troubled sigh.

"Yea, they don't think you're good enough for me and think I should break up with you. I don't know what to do…"

His jaw dropped and his face was painted with confusion. I somehow managed to hold back the laugh that so desperately wanted to come out.

"What? But-but I thought things were going fine? Wha-what did I do-"

I couldn't hold it back anymore, I started laughing and shaking my head at him as he glared at me.

"Relax! I'm just messing with you, they love you Axel."

I smiled apologetically at him. He continued to glare but I knew he wasn't really mad. Namine's voice grabbed my attention and I looked over my shoulder at her.

"Yes, Axel is just grand! Now can we get on to the movie watching please? What are we watching anyways?"

Wondering the same thing myself, I looked back at all the movies on the ground and I started to feel a bit uneasy…Riku got up from the floor after putting the first movie in and walked over to the loveseat with Sora.

"Well, me and Axel kind of ended up choosing scary movies, and as we all know, Roxas doesn't do good with scary movies."

The girls shared a look of excitement before settling onto the far end of the couch, sharing a blanket between the two of them. I threw a glare at Riku before pushing myself off of the floor and headed into the kitchen to grab all the bowls of snacks and popcorn. Axel followed to help me.

"Why did you did pick scary movies then, huh? I swear you guys do it on purpose."

I should probably be used to this by now but I wasn't. I shook my head in annoyance but I wasn't going to ruin everyone else's night by insisting on different movies. I'd never hear the end of it. Axel and I finished placing all the food onto the coffee table before taking up the other end of the couch. I snuggled close into his side, taking comfort in the fact that I wouldn't have to suffer through these movies alone. He took hold of my hand and gave it a squeeze as he whispered into my ear.

"Don't worry Roxie, I'll protect you."

I groaned and elbowed him gently in the side.

"How many times am I gonna have to tell you that I _hate_ being called Roxie?"

He chuckled as he reached over the arm of the couch to flip the light switch off before looking back at me.

"Okay Roxas, let's make a deal. I'll stop calling you Roxie when you legitimately start hating it. How's that sound?"

"Haven't you been listening to me? I've always hated it!"

"Uh huh, then why do you blush every time I say it?"

I couldn't think of a good come back for that. He was so damn frustrating! Mostly cause he was right but there was no way I was ever going to admit that. Everyone laughed at my flustered expression and Namine reached her leg out and prodded my side with her foot.

"Oh come on, this is supposed to be fun _Roxie._"

I glared at her and slapped her foot away.

"Don't you start too! Just start the damn movie already!"

Axel's body shook with silent laughter as he reached for the remote and pressed play. Despite being irritated by Axel, I scooted as close to him as I could without actually being in his lap. Riku hadn't been kidding; I really didn't like scary movies. Okay, maybe that's an understatement. They terrify the hell out of me! And as if the movies don't scare me enough, every time we would finish a scary movie my stupid friends would think of ways to scare me even more. In short, scary movie marathons were not my idea of fun.

The first one we watched wasn't so bad. It was more gory than scary so it didn't really bother me. The second one made me jump at a few parts but I didn't end up covering my eyes, which was saying a lot for me. The next few were a lot scarier and I resorted to burying my face in Axel's shoulder when I couldn't bear to look. I could feel Axel chuckling every time I did and I would elbow him gently in the ribs in retaliation.

As much as I hated the movies we were watching, they at least served as a good distraction from thinking about my dad and how concerned and freaked out I really was. It was exhausting acting like everything was okay when it really wasn't but I really didn't want Axel and my friends to worry about me more than they already were. I shut my eyes, hoping to get a short nap, but after only a few minutes my phone started going off.

Out of habit, I ignored it at fist and let it go straight to voicemail without looking at my phone. Everyone I'd want to talk to was already in the room with me so I didn't really care who was calling. It started to go off again and I felt Axel shift so that he could reach into my pocket and pull my phone out. I shifted as well, trying to get more comfortable so I could actually fall asleep but then Axel started shaking me gently. I groaned and glared up at him.

"What?"

He smiled down at me sadly.

"Sorry Roxas, but it's your dad's doctor…"

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**I KNOW! I'M SORRY FOR THE CLIFFHANGER! DON'T KILL ME!**

**I was gonna write a lot more after that but if I had done that it would've been a monster of a chapter and it still wouldn't be done so I made the decision to turn what would've been a monster chapter into two smaller, yet still long, chapters. **

**I start school the 19****th**** so I'm not entirely sure when I'll be able to have the next chapter up but it will be up at one point or another. PLEASE just bare with me. If I had it my way I wouldn't write all day, every day but unfortunately I have to put other things first. **

**Once again, thank you so much for putting up with me. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me know what you think, please!? I love getting reviews.**

**Reviews please? :O)**


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